At-Risk Adults

At risk how?

I think people feel more responsible for children and their potential to grow in Yiddishkeit. Their parents, teachers, and community may feel more invested in them than the regular adult who has a mind of his or her own.

Joseph – There used to be a time when Kiruv meant providing answers. I hear that today what people are looking for is someone who care, notices them, and respects them. Based on that I hear that the approach of kiruv today has changed.

The answer to your question seems to require knowing what these adults are lacking. Kids-at-risk are usually the results of bad (sometimes traumatic) experiences that they had growing up in our frum society. I’m told the best approach to bring them back is acceptance and a lot of love. The question is whether these adults are struggling with the same issues or if they are struggling from not being able to ask hard questions that trouble them. If the latter then we need to start programs that deal with difficult questions on life and Yiddishkeit. The truth is that these programs are already out there. It could be that they need more support and advertisement.

Furthermore, it seems to me that we should all be taking tochacha from what’s happening around us and look inwardly to determine what we ourselves are lacking. The greater and more refine we become the more hashpa we will naturally have on others. I think we are lacking role models today.

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When you say “at-risk,” do you mean at risk of leaving “the derech” (whichever derech you may mean) or at risk of dangerous behaviors? I think that the conflation of the two problems is a huge issue, as it can mean that people think of leaving a Torah (or even just a specific hashkafic) path in the same way as engaging in behaviors which can risk their lives. (Before anyone starts about how risk to the soul is as dangerous as a risk to the body- if a person dies, or even is injured or damaged enough physically, there’s no going back. There is no equivalency between someone leaving “the derech” and going to college and getting a productive job and someone leaving “the derech” and living on the street taking drugs. I’ve heard it way too often and it’s awful to suggest such a thing.)

If you’re talking about being “at hashkafic risk,” I think the best you can do is provide good and wholesome education in childhood and keep on providing adult education for those interested. After that, in the cases of both meshama and guf, adults are adults and are ultimately responsible for their own decisions, and when it comes to maintaining physical health and well-being should always be supported to make sure that they remain safe (to the best of one’s ability, without being stifling).

One thing that I never understood is the people who make a huge effort to make baal teshuva yeshivos and schools for kids at risk to be welcoming, inclusive, enjoyable and full of opportunities in both academic and social ways and nobody makes the same effort to those who can more automatically slide through the system. If we turned all schools into “baal teshuva schools” or “at risk schools,” we could have the refuah before the makkah. The current system seems the epitome of reactionary behavior.