April 13, 2011 4:32 am at 4:32 am #596304
So I was at a wedding and I met the Chosson for the first time in a while. The problem is I never know what to tell someone who’s celebrating a Simcha. I always just say Mazal Tov and then a moment of awkward silence follows till he moves on to the next guest. What are all those smooth and cool quotes and Brochos people always say to a Bal Simcha or to anyone else in general? B’sha Tova Umitzlachas? How does it go?April 13, 2011 4:16 pm at 4:16 pm #759731popa_bar_abbaParticipant
Just step on his shoes as you go in for the kiss.April 13, 2011 5:24 pm at 5:24 pm #759732
I have the same problem. In a 15 second window- its pretty hard to come up with something to say that wont sound awkward..
I just flash a huge genuine smile that conveys everything, and it does the trick. Its not like they have anything to say back either..April 13, 2011 5:41 pm at 5:41 pm #759733chocandpatienceMember
I have the same type of problem when meeting a baal simcha. I try to think of what to say beforehand.April 13, 2011 5:49 pm at 5:49 pm #759734adorableParticipant
that is the reason why i hate dancing with the kallah in the middle of the whole circle. You have to say something but dont have anything to say….i dont think the baal simcha realizes the awkard moment though because they are just so happy for themseld…April 13, 2011 6:09 pm at 6:09 pm #759735mytakeMember
I usually tell the Kallah, “Oh, wow, you look so beautiful!” and of course the music is so loud that she can’t hear so I try saying (yelling, really) it another couple of times, and by then somebody pushes in and takes over the dance, so I’m free to leave!April 13, 2011 8:39 pm at 8:39 pm #759736HAKOL TOVMember
it’s cute how we all seem to feel the same way when dancing with the kallah!April 14, 2011 12:15 am at 12:15 am #759737brotherofursParticipant
what if the kallah is not dressed tzinuisdik, can u still say she’s beautiful when it’s awkward?April 14, 2011 1:42 am at 1:42 am #759738shlishiMember
brotherofurs: that would be like telling someone who is eating pork that the food looks delicious.April 14, 2011 2:22 am at 2:22 am #759739pumperMember
I am so relieved that I am not the only one who hates dancing in the middle circle with the kallah! I totally dread it!
I am not a good dancer, and I never have anything to say…
good to know I am not the only one…April 14, 2011 4:31 am at 4:31 am #759740commonsenseParticipant
so nice to hear i am not the only one who feels that wayApril 14, 2011 4:43 am at 4:43 am #759741chayav inish livisumayParticipant
allow the awkwardness to fall on the other person, let them deal with itApril 14, 2011 4:54 am at 4:54 am #759742
Haha that’s another “problem”. I try to remain as inconspicuous as possible but I’m always found and pushed in the middle. I’m like thinking “I just want to eat my dessert in peace” while standing on the sidelines. The poor Chosson ends up with bruises due to my clumsy attempt at dancing. I usually end up kicking him and the people surrounding lol.April 14, 2011 5:15 am at 5:15 am #759743
I agree with chayav.April 14, 2011 5:23 am at 5:23 am #759744
i believe in telling people when situations are akward. for example if i was talking to a friend on the phone and the convo wasnt really happening i wud say ” k we both obviously have nothing to say so we might as well hang up and not waste each others time” same thing goes for dancing with the kallah….go in, say mazel tov, tell her you didnt prepare anything to say to her when you would dance with her and then youll both laugh and it will be over…..April 14, 2011 5:27 am at 5:27 am #759745
lol stuffed thats a good line to say actuallyApril 14, 2011 5:35 am at 5:35 am #759746
try it-works every time!!April 14, 2011 12:00 pm at 12:00 pm #759747EloQuint5Member
lol, stuffedcabbage, that’s my MO as well. most chassanim and kallah’s don’t remember what they talked about in 3 hours worth of 15 second increments with random people.
As for the “tell the kallah she’s beautiful”, that won’t work for the OP.April 14, 2011 5:13 pm at 5:13 pm #759748
Nope that won’t work at all.. In fact I reckon it’ll turn an already awkward moment into a downright uncomfortable (and creepy) one :pApril 14, 2011 6:15 pm at 6:15 pm #759749umMember
what do you say as a kallah to the ppl that are dancing with you??April 14, 2011 6:42 pm at 6:42 pm #759750mdpaMember
Um: Thank you for coming, I’m so glad you’re here…April 14, 2011 9:00 pm at 9:00 pm #759751
tell them “im yirtza Hashem by you”April 14, 2011 9:45 pm at 9:45 pm #759752GumBallMember
Mazel Tov !! thank you so much 4 coming!! And lk StuffedCabbage say if the person is single I”YH by you…….April 14, 2011 10:14 pm at 10:14 pm #759753
nobody likes being told I”YH by u..April 14, 2011 10:33 pm at 10:33 pm #759754seeallsidesParticipant
Baal Simcha – I am sooooooooo happy you came (look happy)- it’s so much fun to share a simcha with a great friend – They say i have a power of giving brochos as a baal simcha, so I wish you with all my heart sheyimalei Hashem es kol mishalosaych l’tovah – you should only have brochos, yeshuos, parnassas b’harchava and kol tuv bharchava……..
Guest – Oh you look so gorgeous (wonderful, amazing, lechtig,…) I can’t believe that i am dancing at your wedding, I am so happy i feel like it’s my wedding (my sister’s, my daughter’s ) You can just feel the atmosphere -everybody is just so thrilled with this wonderful shidduch, and loves you, and wishes you the best (kiss, hug……….)
What’s to be uncomfortable – just cherish the moment!!!!!!!! Nobody can even see you or hear you- it’s such a mob scene.April 14, 2011 10:56 pm at 10:56 pm #759755sof davar hakol nishmaMember
just continue smiling, say “may you be zoche to build a bayis neeman…” if new child say may you be zoche to raise him/her letorah, lechupa ulm”t… whatever just smile and show them you happy for them that’s all they care about.
about the kallah not dressed tznius, if your a girl saying to the kallah, matters on your relationship with her. look for something else like your hair/shaitel…makeup maybe just don’t comment on the gown itselfApril 15, 2011 4:50 am at 4:50 am #759756
“nobody likes being told I”YH by u..”
Wrong – I do. I need as many brochos as I can get.April 15, 2011 9:17 pm at 9:17 pm #759757
Health…iy”h by you,and b’korov.April 17, 2011 7:19 am at 7:19 am #759758
E – I would return the Brochah, but I’m not sure if you’re from the group that wants this brochah or not.April 17, 2011 7:35 am at 7:35 am #759759
Health: This is the most recent advice I got on the subject:
You may not feel ready yet,but be careful not to BLOCK any brochos Hashem may want to give you.Like,instead of saying “no thank you” right away,listen….
Doesn’t take away one drop of warranted fear–it’s just a wise mehalech suggested by a wise person.April 17, 2011 7:40 am at 7:40 am #759760
E – You’re too complicated for me, but here goes -I’yh by you B’korov!April 17, 2011 7:40 am at 7:40 am #759761
I shared that for the benefit of others like me,simply since that “outlook” adds no undue pressure at all.It’s just a mindset.
My dream is to be cleared of all the negative…but only Hashem can solve that one.April 17, 2011 8:02 am at 8:02 am #759762
And what’s so complicated about that suggestion?April 17, 2011 2:52 pm at 2:52 pm #759763ZeesKiteParticipant
Iy”H by you B’korov, to be cleared.., to have such an outlook/mindset and then to be! A lot of dreams actually come to realization.April 17, 2011 4:59 pm at 4:59 pm #759764
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