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Is it right to build a big fancy house in a neighborhood where everyone is simple people?
it looks silly, huge mansions next to modest homes….
You’ll probably feel pretty stupid but I don’t think it’s a matter of right and wrong.
Yes. It is fine.
Why would you want to live in a neighborhood that has different values than yours?
The contrary. Usually, they want to live in that neighborhood because they have the same values.
How likely are you to make a decision based on what anyone here says???
Do they have a an extra large family? Are they building a larger home because they plan to have room for the grandkids I”H, or because they host zedaka parties or host gedolim and therefor NEED more room? Are they making room for parents? Or for out-of-town family?
Are you going on the premise that they THINK they are better than the rest of you or are they smart in this economy that they can get more for their money right now, so why not think ahead? Just because it is large and spacious does that automatically mean that it is also fancy and ostentatious?
Why do you care how big the house is?
Is it a matter of “big” or a matter of “fancy.” Someone with ten kids may want a big house. That’s different from having gold-plated water faucets (yep, seen those) or designer brick work or two-ton chandeliers – that’s “fancy.”
The real issue is life-style. Are they going to put pressure on their less affluent neighbors to compete with them?
Why is this any skin off of your nose?
Why is this any skin off of your nose?
Because he doesn’t want an eyesore.
Because he doesn’t want an eyesore.
I don’t believe that. I think he is jealous.
3500 sf is not an average house!
I know someone who bought a new house. They saved up and got a really good deal on a big, fixed up house from someone who needed instant cash. Imagine this – she said she is embarrassed to move cuz pple will talk – “why do they need such a big house”
“are they trying to pop our eyes out” etc.
No, pple don’t want you to be jealous of them. They do what works for them and what they feel is comfortable for them. By your talking and analyzing, YOU, with your small house, create the pressure.
notedasken – “and somoene is putting up a 7000 square foot home” What do you care what somone else is doing?
Make sure to stock up on lots of Roiteh Bendlach, you’ll need it.
It apparently shtuchs the eyes of the neighbors who are living a more pashut life. PLUS, as a result of your big, facy house, THEIR TAXES GO UP TOO. So they see your monstrosity, get no benefit from you coming into their area, and have to pay for your lifestyle too, That’s a LOT to ask for.
Living in a big house is awesome. Who cares if the guy next to you can’t afford it?
no emotion will depress you quite as fast as envy.
Hadn’t thought of the tax angle (don’t own a house). So yes, that’a a reason to be concerned. Check with your local tax authorities to see if there’s any way you can prevent it affecting your own tax rate. I sometimes do statistics, and adding one very large value into a group can drag the average really really high – not so good for the “typical” homeowners.
over the last 40 years in America, the average new house has been getting larger. Our expectations change and we are unwilling to live as compactly as our grandparents did.
How many people lived in your grandparents’ home? How many live in your home (adjust for square footage). Did your grandparents have a game room? a home office? a room for the pets?
The good news is that the trend seems to have peaked, and we are seeing fewer of these McMansions than in the past decade.
Torah tells us not to covet, and so those of us “simple people” who object to our neighbor’s having a bigger house should remind ourselves of that. Torah also tells us to be modest, but if Hashem has blessed us with many children and the means to house them comfortably, and we are discreet in our design, there is no Torahic reason not to build a big house anywhere.
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