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Nah, if you’re not really interested in hearing, I’m not here to bother or aggravate you, y’know.
~a~
moish interesting picture… but i guess thats the way it really is with a bad habit
try, whenever you “eat a cookie” make yourself do something that you really hate to do after. say do an hour on a treadmill per cookie, every time you think of doing it, you’ll associate the enjoyment of the cookie with the treadmill and you’ll start to hate the habit itself 🙂
or you crash every once in a while- which could be worse.
why is it worse? to give in once in a while is nto good but certainly better than all the time.
there is no easy formula for breaking a bad habit – especially one that has given you so much grief in the past – stop looking for an easy formula – obviously it is a tough habit to break- and it does not make you happy – i think you have to come to terms with the fact that you are the master and the habit is not –
so now – take advantage of everybody’s advice – and Prepare Yourself – you are AT WAR.
1)get rid of the ability to do the habit – get rid of the cookies – the books, program your computer to turn off automatically after whatever time your limit should be-
2)visualize what you will do when temptation hits –
– i will repeat these 10 catch phrases – i will look at my list
– i will remember how i feel afterwards, etc. etc.
3)realize what a great accomplishment it will be when you can say – 1 month ok, 1 year ok, 5 years ok etc.
4)Distract yourself – get busy, get involved, help someone…..
5)find reasons why your bad habit is offensive – (i had so much trouble stopping to bite my nails – even on shabbos i’m embarrassed to say) and then i heard someone say that chewing on your nails is like eating neveilah) and i couldn’t get rid of my nails – so i kept on thinking neveilah, neveilah…… and i stopped
6)if you slip – you can’t beat up on yourself, just start again – if you focus on the failure you will not be able to start up again – but if you remember that you were successful for x times, you can focus on the success. It’s a great success – it is hard to break a habit.
sorry if this is more than you want……. you sound like a great guy – hang in there!
ok, anonymisss (why am i doing this to myself??) what was it?
Moish, I wasn’t going to tell you that you belong in school or that you should at least be working. All I was going to say is that you can make yourself an asset to your family and friends by making a point of going out of your way to do one nice thing for someone that you wouldn’t normally do. Will that give you something to do all day? No. It will make you be able to go to sleep at night (or whenever) and say, “I did something of value today.” That is all.
~a~
moish, I am totally serious. That answer will not be accepted. Sorry.
moish- a few points:
– davening for help is not only to help stop doing aveiros, it’s for all aspects of life.
– it helps to have someone physically involved. A while back, a sibling of mine helped kick a very bad habit/aveira. She just took the situation/fight out my hands and I never had to deal with it again. She explained it was a ‘lion teivah’- something that rears it’s head at the most inconvenient, unexpected, spotty, sudden moments and we have almost no control over it. Once you are in the middle- you can’t stop. So we need to be proactive. Get someone involved, to help, to prevent. You never know- many times they have new ideas that work. Or- they can help implement known ideas (not argue that it’s “impossible” or won’t work!)
PS- please excuse any confusion, have a massive headache
mind games… do you think we have telepathy? if so you should be able to narrow it down… right… about… now! ;);)
funny moish- I couldn’t decide between 2, then realized 1 of them was semi discussed here already, so…
moish theres punishing and theres punishing. it could work if youre willing to follow through with the “punishment” 🙂
moish, you said that your whole life is “one bored waste of time”. Well such a situation gives rise to the problem you’re struggling with. I think SAS had good tactics but it seems like you feel your problem is too big for those ideas. But as many posters have said there is NO easy way. Try to limit your exposure to cookies and when you feel the problem starting use the methods mentioned- distraction, leave wherever you are, remind yourself how bad you’ll feel after…(maybe I am way off base and am thinking of the wrong issue, but I don’t think so)
areivim, may I know what ‘the book’ is?
joyous check your transmitter 😉
kapusta-what?!
mind games… do you think we have telepathy? if so you should be able to narrow it down… right… about… now! ;);)
areivim, may I know what ‘the book’ is?
🙂
moish, not to start hammering you (again) but maybe this is the way to change, youve said many times on here that you are not happy the way you are now… one step at a time is the way to go 🙂
moish01: If I understand what you are trying to talk about, I had/have a similar struggle and I went to many people to ask them what to do and basically they said to get more yiras shamaim. I said thanks that really helps but I am still struggling and not getting anywhere. no one can understand a specific person’s struggle and everyone struggles differently. everyone has to figure out what works for them. Maybe when I find out what works for me I’ll let you know. If it helps, your not the only one out there struggling!
mosih01: A common misconception that because your not doing the right thing it means your not happy.
postemgirl: If I understand correctly what he is talking abou then I dont think you know what he is talking about.
aussie- postsem can have a similar struggle to moish
moish, no need to change your whole life although it would make things easier. Use methods mentioned above for when you are face to face with the challenge.
Obviously im way off
lol this whole misunderstanding what the habit is cracks me up!
striving: Misunderstanding? You sound like you know what it is.
aussieboy: i totally don’t. that’s what makes it so funny…
moish01: Is there a reason you cant just say what it is?
I narrowed it down to 2 choices and I have no clue which it is.
~a~
aussie, I wonder if mods would let it through.
~a~
moish01: Ok then im not way off.
moish01: who were you talking to when you said
“by the way you’re a little off in your thinking”
maybe we should kick AOB out if shes under 13… moish I dont remember where you said it but you definitely implied it a few times. just in case I missed the boat on this one, are you really happy now? 🙂 I think I’m pretty sure what youre talking about but if you dont start somewhere then how is it supposed to change? 🙂
moish01: age for what?
ames: Not an easy thing to punish yourself.
why 18? im confused why would we need to kick her out even if she was under 13?
**EDIT**
Oh. i get it now, I guess he was referring to PG13, and R is 17.
if the cr legal age was 18….you too would not be here!!! i’m just sayin!!!
Jax: Not really he would have just lied about his age 😉
moish: oh no!!!!
lucky for you too no legal age here!!! sweet dreams you 2!!! i’m really goin now!!!
JAX: OUR MINYAN!!!!!! oh well i guess i wont be able to daven with a minyan today 😉
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