- This topic has 22 replies, 10 voices, and was last updated 9 years, 5 months ago by .
-
Posts
-
What if you live out of town and can’t get a car? Is it muttar to use a car service/uber/taxi? When can you go by public?
Why would there be a problem using a car service? It could be even less of a problem that driving alone with her.
Why is a car necessary if public transportation is available?
lesschumras, the concept of the car was probably induced by society conventions, to look better or whatever it is.
It would be much easier to meet in the city, everyone going by his own means (im talking from experience). Just now if someone wants to go that way, he would never get married.
In Eretz Yisroel, the norm in the yeshivishe velt is to date without a car. The guy and gal meetup at the agreed to place, each getting there on their own.
The Parisian, when you take parking fees and tolls into account, that’s an enormous expense for each date. It’s much cheaper, and often much faster, to take public transit. Driving is a societal “mesorah” that doesn’t have to be followed
I totally agree with you, personally i have no licence.
I think that as far as dates are concerned, Americans are worse than Israelis (which is something), the formalization is just craaaaaaaaaaaaazy.
“Why is a car necessary if public transportation is available? “
Assuming they are travelling together and they would like to converse, then a car is much more practical.
Additionally, public transportation may be available, but that does not mean it is convenient, for either party, and this is just more respectful.
Why are cars a necessity? Cars are not that old and people have been dating for thousands of yrs. How did people do it before cars?
The parisian:Why do you think somebody without a car will not get married? plenty of people date without cars and get married- maybe not to the same type of person who has a car but there are those who don’t care so much about a car.
Nisht, available=convenient. It’s easy to converse and no less respectful
I don’t have a car and sometimes my date drives to me. It’s practical. Travelling 2 hrs to meet her there is not.
However … the parent generation are very much old fashion and become furious when the man does not pick their daughter up from their place “like they should.”
They don’t get it.
I dont get so much your point Nisht, if we resettle the date to be just in the city (bars, retsos, caffes,…) its possible to shmuz the same amount of time, increasing the number of dates if necessary.
The only advantage of the car is that its possible to converse on the way, which is harder by MTA (i agree its not so geshmack to exchange views on the life at 34th street Herald Square with “stand clear of the closing doors please”). Its a very thin plus for a big headache.
I think it may be the girls who would have a negative opinion of a boy who doesn’t drive or doesn’t come by a car. Driving a car is like basic rite of adulthood, and maybe some girls don’t mind, but it seems many girls think it strange when a guy doesn’t drive or come by car. Also in car service as well as public transportation it’s difficult to have a private conversation.
And in a lounge or kosher restaurant it is easier to have a private conversation than in a car service??
For a girl to mind that her date came with a car service instead of driving is no better than for her to mind that his family uses a silver colored tablecloth for Shabbos instead of gold colored tablecloth or that he wears slip-on shoes instead of laces.
I think you are missing the point that when dating people prefer it not be a public spectacle whom they are dating. I have heard more than one instance where girls will date from a different location just so neighbors don’t see their dates. Taking public transportation is just that…public. As for the car service, I would agree that it’s nerdy way to do, but don’t compare it to people who care about table settings.
Being in public is not as awkward as being with one other person.
Flatbushet, shidduch dates usually are intentionally held in public places; why does transportation have to be private?
We can only speculate, but girls seem to have a distaste for going on a date via public transportation or car service.
just take the train, unless the girl is JAPpy shell be fine with it, back in the day, it was normal when everyone was poor.
People, i think there is a confusion here: Coming to the girl in a car has two aspects.
-“Dating”, i.e conversing in the car, on the way to and from the city.
– Going to a dating place (in the city) by car.
As far as the first aspect is concerned i agree that cars cant be replaced by MTA. BUT the date does not have to start under the girl’s porch! They can decide to meet straight in a resto in the city. And separate there. But here also can be a jappy problem, if the girl doesnt want to dirty her stiletto heels on the train floor, but again they could dress less formal…..
You’re far better off without a jap.
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.