September 20, 2011 2:15 am at 2:15 am #599482photogenicMember
I am curious what my fellow CR’s would view of my question.
Can you Daven for something that you want very much, if you feel that it is something that will be good for you and will also bring Nachas to Hashem, but of course (as with anything) you dont know 100% if its good for you? Or is anything that will bring Nachas to Hashem and with the right intentions, good for you? I hope I am clear here.September 20, 2011 2:23 am at 2:23 am #811234BaalHaboozeParticipant
hashem wants us to be in contact with him as much as possible, to have the closest and warmest bond. Daven for anything, talk to Him in the middle of the day, even if it isn’t Minyan time yet. Of course He will answer you either yes or no, but He’ll be so happy to hear your beautiful voice, like a Tatte loves to hear his little kid’s voice no matter what he has to say.September 20, 2011 2:32 am at 2:32 am #811235GumBallMember
If Hashem Knows that its good for you then obviously he will give it to you but if he knows its not he wont…September 20, 2011 2:47 am at 2:47 am #811236mddMember
Gumball, it says in the Gemora that if a person davens for something, even if it is not good for him, HaShem might give it to him just because he is asking.September 20, 2011 2:49 am at 2:49 am #811237Sam2Participant
It’s a Mefurash Gemara that we shouldn’t ask for something that is bad for us because Hashem might grant it and we’ll regret it. The Gemara tells a story of someone who Davened to marry a particular girl, ended up marrying her, and regrets it.September 20, 2011 3:01 am at 3:01 am #811238September 20, 2011 3:09 am at 3:09 am #811239BaalHaboozeParticipant
*kapusta* – everytime I see your sn I am reminded of my Babbeh’s delicious kapusta :p
maybe I will daven that this years batch tastes like hers this erev Yom Kippur…September 20, 2011 3:48 am at 3:48 am #811240photogenicMember
Firstly, thanks for taking time to reply!
I think I will clarify a bit deeper. (I tend to think myself in a muddle but thats not bad…right?)
First, can one Daven for something in particular if he has the right intentions and feels that it will be good for him? For example: to help himself improve his Middos, become spritually closer to Hashem, to be able to give more money to Tzeddaka, be able to give good advice, get a certain job he feels would be able to help a lot of people, marry a person who has great Midos and Yirat Hashem-and then specify particulars-and then say “if its good for me, please grant it”
Also, I must admit I am curious-what does “if its good for you” mean? Isnt anything that Hashem does good? And can anything be good if used or happens in the correct way? (Can Hashem change things for xyz to end up being good, even if it wasnt originally the case)
How can one know what to Daven for or what is truly good?
Which brings me to my next question-why cant someone Daven for something in specifics (shidduch, job, etc.) if he only has good intentions in mind for mentioning it.
Wow. That was a mouthful. Thanks in advance!
And extra points to Yossi Z. for his original points offline 🙂September 20, 2011 3:59 am at 3:59 am #811241workinonitMember
QUESTION: how do i know when im supposed to stop davening for a specific thing. ok lets say i rly wanted a bike so i daven to Hashem every day for a bike, after a year should i take the hint tht Hashem doesnt think i should have a bike or does it mean i have to daven harder?September 20, 2011 11:04 am at 11:04 am #811242NechomahParticipant
I don’t think that anything Hashem sends us can be not for the good, but sometimes Hashem gives us things or has us experience things that are “good for us” but it is hard to see the good. Let’s say, for example, the loss of a friendship when one party moves far away. Now you might think that it’s not good for you, who wants to lose a friend. But, Hashem knows that it is good for you, because maybe you were too dependent on that friendship or whatever, and now without it you will develop more independence, more leadership skills, new friends, etc, that you might not have done had you had that friend close by. Was it painful? Yes. Was it good? It was hard to see in the beginning, but maybe with hindsight the person might appreciate that it was in fact good for him even though he did not think so in the beginning or even in the process of reaching the final goal.
I think it is helpful to ask Hashem to give you what is good for you and for it to be sweet and that you should be able to see the good (so that it is obvious that it is good and you’re not left wondering).September 20, 2011 11:47 am at 11:47 am #811243ToiParticipant
in response to OP- the chovos halvavos in shaar cheshbon hanefesh brings down that a certain tzaddik used to end off his tfilla saying to Hashem ” You know what better for me and whats beneficial and whats not. if i asked for something thats not good for me then i dont want it.” that covers you tooSeptember 20, 2011 6:14 pm at 6:14 pm #811244mommamia22Participant
Someone I dated told me he Davened that our shidduch should work out. I was having issues with him and hesitating and shlepping for a long while and later, after we decided to end it he told me he recently changed his tefillos to “if it’s good for me, let it be, if not, not”. I thought that was pretty ironic. The power of tefillah. Be careful what you wish (ask) for, lest it come true. Just because you believe someone or something is amazing, doesn’t mean it’s amazing for you. Better to Daven to be granted what’s good for you, and if “this” is “it”, that you should have clarity to see it.September 20, 2011 7:19 pm at 7:19 pm #811245ha ha ha haMember
i heard that there are things hashem wants to give us but he just wants us to ask!!! so keep on davining that is the whole point…..
as the snake in p berashis was punished that he has everything he needs and won’t have to ask hashem for anything at 1st this looks like a privilge not a punishment but it is as the whole point in creation is that we get closer to hashem and daving is one of the clearest ways!!!
keep on davening hashem is waiting for you teffilos!!September 20, 2011 8:42 pm at 8:42 pm #811246GumBallMember
mdd-I daven everyday for moshiach and he still hasent come, for the past years i have done this. I doubt Hashem thinks its bad for me…
why hasent moshiach come if i always daven??September 21, 2011 12:25 am at 12:25 am #811247brotherofursParticipant
hahaha- wow that’s really nice! 😀
i also heard sm like that..September 21, 2011 4:46 am at 4:46 am #811248
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