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We recently bought a house with a private driveway. Our private driveway is right next to our neighbors private driveway (for clarity, they will be called ‘a’). When we moved in, we found out that a neighbor across the street from us has been using our driveway before we moved in. ‘a’ never used the driveway and so this other neighbor always just pulled in easily using both drieways. ‘a’ told them they can no longer use the driveway because we moved in. We pull into our driveway the same way that this other neighbor did. We do help out ‘a’ by shoveling after a snowstorm, checking the drain in the backyard to make sure there is no flooding, sweeping leaves, and other neighborly things.
This other neighbor has not stopped bothering us and making me feel like 2 cents everytime i see them. Yes parking is hard in our neighborhood. But what right do you have to be upset at me? We paid a fortune for a private driveway!!
My question is, are we wrong at all? Should we be telling ‘a’ that they can use her driveway even though it’ll be an inconvenience for us? (the driveways are about 7.5 feet wide so with 2 cars there it woudl be tight)
It is up to Mr/s A to decide if they want the nudges from across the street to use their driveway but there is no reason for the nudges to be cheppering you about your driveway it seems to me that the A’s told them they cant do it anymore that should be the end but some people once given a favor feel that that favor may never be rescinded that is their own perception and a lack of hakaros hatov.
You give some people a hand, they put it into your pocket. that is how the folks across the street are acting.
lol would you people get your driveways under control. i’m going to have to start billing soon.
from a legal standpoint, there is nothing they can do. they may allege that they have an easement by prescription from the previous owner, but this is highly, highly unlikely (See: the last driveway post). if anything, just tell “a” that they encroach on your area and you want them gone. if they are paying him, he’ll tell them to be more careful. if they’re not, he’ll either get annoyed at them or tell them to stop for good. mumbling something about a lawyer may help your cause. if i understand you situation correctly, it doesn’t sound like the “other neighbor” has any standing to be upset, though it’s not like that has ever stopped anybody.
this is why having to interact with other humans is annoying.
Why not just slash their tires?
Popa, because they’re not parking there.
They cannot park in YOUR driveway. What you neighbor allows them to do in HER driveway is her business. I feel for you, I really do, as I live next door to a Yeshivah where the bochurim, mispallelim, sometimes even rebbeim are frequently encroaching on my driveway, even if it is “only a little bit,” and often blocking it entirely. When they block just a little, it prevents me from going into my own driveway, especially if there is another car on the other side of the driveway, and I have difficulty walking at times, aso parking far down the street is not an option for me. The bottom line – all people have to have real consideration for other people.
You don’t want to slash their tires if they’re parking there. Then they can’t move their car out.
i didn’t get your situation right above. 0/2 on the day. yeah dude just keep doing your thing, ignore the haters. if they actually park in the driveway, make a fuss. don’t be nice and let them park: once you do, good luck getting them out.
There is no need to get nasty and start slashing tyres, a little valve removing screwdriver is far more effective…
Also, for the record: ????? ??? ?? ??? ???? ???
They are upset at you. So that means the two of you have discussed the parking, or at least they have told you why they are upset. What have you said to them? Have they suggested they would park only on a’s side and you said they can’t?
Did you originally tell a to tell them they can’t?
One cannot tell “a” what he or she can tell someone else regrading “a”‘s property unless it impinges on your property. It’s annoying, but true. Unless someone is breaking the law or a City ordinance of some type, you have no recourse. I HATE shared (for all practical purposes) driveways. It’s really best to have a definite line of demarcation, so there is no confusion. I would paint a yellow bus stripe down the middle or plant something, just to clairfy the boundary.
So perhaps this is what happened:
Your neighbor told this people that they need to stop parking there, and when they asked why, told them that you had said so.
So you should tell a that as far as you are concerned, they are welcome to park on the other side of the driveway which belongs to your neighbor. They certainly aren’t complaining about not having the right to park on your land (regardless of what it cost, I’m not sure why you would mention that).
If in fact you don’t want them parking on the other side, then that is why they are mad at you. It isn’t your land.
If in fact you don’t want them parking on the other side, then that is why they are mad at you. It isn’t your land.
I look at it this way: The next door neighbor can allow the across the street neighbor to park, but it would greatly inconveinience the OP, so meiheichi teisa to do a favor at their expense, especially since the OP does favors for them.
Well now, now you’re introducing the next door neighbor’s reasons for what he is doing.
But you want to know why A is upset at you. A is upset at you because A thinks you made a deal with next door neighbor for next door neighbor to not allow A to park in their side of the driveway.
Maybe it was a good deal for neighbor, and maybe you made no deal with neighbor. But that is probably why A is upset at you.
So either tell A that you don’t care if A parks there, or live with A being upset at you.
If you want to know who I think is right, I can give an opinion on that also.
popa, I’d like to know your opinion on who is right.
(Btw, you are mixing up the references to “A”. “A” is the next door neighbor who has the attached driveway, not the across the street neighbor who used to park in the driveway that wasn’t hers.)
We had a similar situation in my neighborhood… there are a few houses in a row with driveways between them. The driveways are not shared- each house has its own. In one house the owner didn’t have a car, so the people who lived in the house next door always used both driveways near their house- their own and the other one. When someone else bought the house and did have a car there was a scuffle over who parks in the driveway… A private driveway, not shared.
Meiheichi Teisa: Where does it come from, where do you get it from, IOW, why should they be better than you.
As far as who’s right, that probably depends on the level of inconvenience to both parties. If it’s really not that hard to all in and out with two cars in the driveway, and/or it’s really difficult for the neighbor to find parking, it would be the “neighborly” thing to tell the next door neighbor to allow the across the street neighbor to park there, although the NDN can do what they please.
If the level of difficulty is similar, that’s when I say “Meiheichi Teisa”. Although you can be the good one and be “mevater” (give in) anyhow, for the sake of peace and to be a tzaddik (tzaddekes).
Either way, the neighbors don’t really have a tayna, but that’s normal human nature, and you should understand that.
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