Home › Forums › Bais Medrash › Forgiven. But maybe not.
- This topic has 19 replies, 7 voices, and was last updated 12 years, 5 months ago by Doodle-Man™.
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July 2, 2012 10:28 pm at 10:28 pm #603967SayIDidIt™Participant
Many years ago, someone promised me something. At that time I didn’t care for the item so much, and today I really don’t.
And the person never gave it to me. S/He probably forgot about it. (I never told him/her that I don’t really want it). And I forgave the person.
But then, I mentioned this story to someone else and he told me that if I still remember the story, I still have a grudge and was not mochel the person properly.
Was I mochel or not?
July 2, 2012 11:08 pm at 11:08 pm #885808Song of BlessingParticipantI dont think it has anything to do with it that coz you remember the story you have a grudge. But think about it if you are in a really bad mood and everything is going wrong – if you’d think about that story would it make your mood worse or you’d stay the same as you were before…
in other words do YOU think you have a grudge? Maybe it would help to talk to the person that was supposed to give you the item in question and ask them casually “hey remember…” it might help you see if you really forgave them or not to talk to them about it.
July 2, 2012 11:10 pm at 11:10 pm #885809nitpickerParticipantIf you still remember the story, then …??!!
Why wouldn’t you remember it?
July 2, 2012 11:25 pm at 11:25 pm #885810KozovMemberBefore you ask anybody else, ask the person who told that to you to explain the correlation between remembering and having a grudge, or at least what’s the source, and if his explanation is not satisfactory don’t let it get to you.
July 2, 2012 11:28 pm at 11:28 pm #885811SayIDidIt™ParticipantShira
if you’d think about that story would it make your mood worse or you’d stay the same as you were before…
First, are you new here? If yes, welcome aboard! Join the Fun™!
Next, no, it would not make me even a tiny bit more angry/upset. I really don’t care for the item.
About talking to the person, there is really no point in mking him/her feel bad about it. And if I do talk to him/her s/he will think that I DO want it and have been holding a grudge for many years. But thanks for the advice!
nitpicker
Why wouldn’t you remember it?
EXACTLY!!
July 2, 2012 11:33 pm at 11:33 pm #885812SayIDidIt™ParticipantShira: I see you’ve been a member for four years yet you don’t have a single post to your name – even AFTER posting above! Can you explain that or are you J*seph???
SIDI™
July 3, 2012 12:10 am at 12:10 am #885813Song of BlessingParticipantSay IDidIt
Yeah I am actually new its weird that it says for four years???? I dunno I have a bunch of posts in my name but it just changed it to shira1988 so weird i was messing about on my profile page now i can’t see how to change it back oh well.. but i think i’m the ones that it says shira all over the place lol.
And who’s Joseph?
And back to the topic i think you shouldnt worry about what people say about holding grudges or not. You seem to know very well that you don’t and you dont care for it so why worry about it. And I agree with nitpicker – i mean do you forget that your little sister tore up your coloring book when you were 7. Probably not, and maybe at the time you were upset but remembering it 20 years later doesn’t mean you hold a grudge about it. Most probably its funny after the fact.
July 3, 2012 12:16 am at 12:16 am #885814SayIDidIt™ParticipantShira1988: Click HERE for your correct Profile page (or just click your screennmae on the top of any CR page)
Back on topic. I agree with you. Its the other person who said I wasn’t mochel…
SIDI™
July 3, 2012 12:19 am at 12:19 am #885815Doodle-Man™MemberShira: HERE
July 3, 2012 12:32 am at 12:32 am #885816Song of BlessingParticipantya i know how to get to my profile page but before I could edit my name and now i cant… lol
and it says:
Member Since
May 30, 2012 (1 month)
so where did you see 4 years?
yep so I hope you feel better about it 🙂
and moskidoodle what do you mean? ur link is to google…
July 3, 2012 12:36 am at 12:36 am #885817SayIDidIt™ParticipantShira: HERE!
July 3, 2012 12:54 am at 12:54 am #885818July 3, 2012 1:23 am at 1:23 am #885819Song of BlessingParticipantgot it.
and moskidoodle, joseph is NOT me lmao
July 3, 2012 12:06 pm at 12:06 pm #885820SayIDidIt™ParticipantShira: when you first posted, your name said just Shira. So I checked out Shira’s profile (HERE), and it sows that “Shira” was here for four years wit no posts. But you did post above. So I thought you must be one of J*seph’s elves!!
SiDi™
July 3, 2012 1:40 pm at 1:40 pm #885821☕ DaasYochid ☕ParticipantI really don’t care for the item.
The item is not what you hold a grudge about, it’s the broken promise.
July 3, 2012 2:12 pm at 2:12 pm #885822Doodle-Man™MemberDY: You took the words right out of my computer.
July 3, 2012 2:31 pm at 2:31 pm #885823SayIDidIt™ParticipantDY: I hear what you are saying, yet I disagree. I don’t hold anything against the person.
SiDi™
July 3, 2012 3:02 pm at 3:02 pm #885824SayIDidIt™Participantmoski: better get a better anti-virus program!!
July 18, 2012 4:30 pm at 4:30 pm #885825HaLeiViParticipantJust making sure you forgot it…
July 18, 2012 4:40 pm at 4:40 pm #885826Doodle-Man™MemberPBA is very sorry he broke the promise but he knew you didn’t care about it anyway.
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