Gift for Jewish, intermarried, but interested preceptor

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    Posts
  • #605503
    hudi
    Participant

    Any ideas?

    #901239
    bubka
    Participant

    A gift certificate for a divorce lawyer.

    #901240
    yitzchokm
    Participant

    Why would you give a gift, which sorta says you give a “blessing” to this defilement of Gd?

    #901241
    Whiteberry
    Member

    Buy something related to the role of preceptor.

    #901242
    gavra_at_work
    Participant

    Joe: Although everyone will agree that what is being done is incorrect, your suggestion will only hurt your cause. Ezehu Chacham HaRoeh Es Hanolad.

    I would suggest a Kosher Mezzuza, and you go “help” them put it up properly so that the party can get a Mitzva. As we know, Mitzva Goreres Mitzva, so that could start the path.

    #901243
    yaakov doe
    Participant

    Doesn’t giving a gift show approval of intermarriage?

    #901244
    golfer
    Participant

    yitzchok & yaakov, i think you misunderstood. The OP is not giving a wedding gift. Just a gift.

    I like the mezuzah idea, but I wonder if there’s a problem with putting a mezuzah in a position where it’s likely to be disposed of disrespectfully?

    #901245

    My Rav poskened that I could not give a wedding gift in this situation.

    #901246
    zahavasdad
    Participant

    Who is the Jewish Partner, If the woman is jewish and there are Kids. I think the answer is very different than if the man is jewish and there are kids

    #901247
    bubka
    Participant

    We don’t treat a man or woman differently if he/she intermarries. Either way, they should be sat shiva for.

    #901248
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    ??’ ???? ?? ???? ???? ????

    #901249
    golfer
    Participant

    Or am I the one who misunderstood??

    Wedding gift- probably bad idea. Ask.

    I’m not the resident CR poseik so I decline to suggest an answer.

    #901250
    loca
    Member

    Omg! (Is this a troll or r we just bein dense?)

    Peeps! She is a person. First and foremost. An act of kindness shouldnt be coming with ideas on how to “help” her. It should be to build a relationship. And out of love for her- ur family. Without Judgement! If I wasnt religious and was reading this because I was curious about the inside lives of the Yeshivish World Id be so unimpressed right now.

    #901251
    oomis
    Participant

    I did not gift a gift in this situation, and the bride was my husband’s niece. We also did not go to the wedding, and there were some repercussions for a while, until my sister-in-law’s husband passed away.

    #901252
    yentingyenta
    Participant

    SHE IS NOT ASKING ABOUT A WEDDING GIFT! she is asking about a thank you gift to her preceptor, the person who guided her on the floor for a bit.

    hudi,we used to give coffee and donuts + a card to the floor and instructor. never had a preceptor (yet, IY”H soon). Did she/he ever say “i’d really like X”?

    #901253
    hudi
    Participant

    She was married before she became my preceptor. This is a thank you gift for being my preceptor. (I’m in nursing school). I mentioned that intermarried part, so you get an idea of her situation.

    #901254
    hudi
    Participant

    Golfer – correct.

    #901255

    What about a jewish cookbook. Traditional foods have gone a long way in bringing people back.

    #901256
    Torah613Torah
    Participant

    Mezuzahs, so they can keep an easy mitzva.

    #901257
    dhl144
    Member

    Gavra_at_work very well said…sounds great! misva gorreres misva! I love that

    #901258
    hudi
    Participant

    Gavra- that is a nice idea. Do you think it may be too “in her face” that it’s something religious?

    I was thinking of getting a charm with her Hebrew name.

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