Home Forums Shidduchim girls!!!! DON"T SELL YOURSELVES CHEAP!!!

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    Emunas Itecha- great story!

    health; what reccommendations are you refering to?


    HILARIOUS! thank you all for a few minutes of quality entertainment.

    lets make sure i got it right –

    woman is very upset and posts short (and somewhat mild, really) rant. (she forgets that on the internet EVERYONE sees your words and judges you critically, no accusations there, this is a well known malady that has been tossed around for years by experts and psychologists studying the phenomenon of what happens when ppl can hide behind the anonymity of the internet. (RE: story about girl studying for finals, asian girls in library wont stop talking, she is super frustrated and like an idiot during her video blog because of her frustration she mouths off meaninglessly about how she doesn’t like asians and they dont belong in america, her life is promptly ruined, family gets death threats, she sends a heartbreaking apology to various newspapers FROM HIDING asking them to please print it on her behalf. you can google story for more info. its an object lesson about the dangers of venting on the net. as in NEVER EVER DO IT EVERYONE HATES YOU FOR IT NOTHING GOOD WILL COME OF IT EVER PERIOD.))

    People take her incredibly seriously and come out in full assault mode (they don’t look at it that way, they see themselves as being totally rational and objective, for some reason anonymity does that. the normal social boundaries that prevent us from saying certain hurtful or highly critical things or from using judgement to asses situations in a more positive light (because its socially incorrect not to) disappears. WELCOME TO THE NET!)

    she gets very defensive because of harsh attacks (totally normal response) (of course, why she should care about anonymous posters who she has never met is in itself a mystery, but the sense of “community” tends to do that. another not-so-well-understood phenomenon of the net.) and tries to rewrite and recast some of her words (perhaps even honestly)

    remember net criticism? rinse and repeat. she aint getting NOWHERE with this.

    i thought the coup de grace was at some point she made what seemed like a sincere attempt at somewhat defusing by desperately offering an “olive branch” in telling someone that their passion for defending others from anonymous net attacks was impressive.

    remember net criticism? rinse and repeat. she aint getting NOWHERE with this.

    tl;dr: the internet isnt your personal diary or your best friend, everyone can see what you wrote, and YOU WILL GET HAMMERED VIOLENTLY FOR IT. (im sure i will for this post, but it just amuses me so fire away ^_^)

    when you want to rant, go to a store, buy a leather bound note book, write comments like “all boys are SOOOOOO STUPID OMG I HATE MEN (cept my hubby hes the bees nees) AND AND AND THEY ARE GARBAGE TOO. (just an example, really i thought the op was ok. i had nothing to say.)

    then take the notebook and hide it where if someone finds it and sees it, you can be furious at the invasion of your privacy and private feelings.

    or confide in a close friend who understands how you talk, and knows exactly what you mean, and wont put your words up for public display, to be judged and bashed ANONYMOUSLY.


    even more tl;dr: i would love to see this conversation play out face-to-face



    Emunas Itecha; I really liked that story.

    Shtieger; The one above has a divine plan for each and everyone of us. I too hope to find my zivug bekorov. It’s important for people to make a life long decision, rather than act in haste.. I admire him for evaluating it before proceeding further into anything. I’m sure he’s a great guy, that just has a SMALL commitment problem. like Emunas Itecha said with the right girl he’ll be fine! Hope he finds her soon.

    I’m just wondering how in the world brainy knows shtieger..

    Health; I really hope you find your true zivug soon.


    Geshmakke Mentch – according to shteiger, you simply dont exist. You are a lie. a creation of the big, bad shidduch machine that sets up the scum of the earth with the best girls.


    Shtieger -“health; what reccommendations are you refering to?”

    I’ll copy and paste, since you missed it:

    “How about getting him the help he needs by suggesting he should go for some professional help? Do yourself a favor, stop Redding him Shidduchim and stop Bashmutzing him.”


    Bring back the Kosher singles events – it’s the only way.


    lolface – While you make a lot of interesting points, the Jewish blogs are driven by different rules than the regular net. We on Frum websites try to hold the posters to the standards on the Torah. So differences such as anonymity (Hashem knows who you are), or I’m just ranting (ranting you can be Oiver many Issurim, like Kaas, LH, etc…) aren’t excuses!



    Great post. But wholly inaccurate here.

    Go back and read the original posts, they were pretty respectful and understanding.


    maybe popa, but tell me this, if was frustrated and annoyed, should she post here, or in her private diary?


    Oh yes, I absolutely agree with you about that, and about the general storyline.

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