growing up

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  • #1988686
    eishis chayil
    Participant

    sharing stories from then

    #1988751
    johnklets
    Participant

    So please start with a story and we will continue….

    #1988777
    IYK
    Participant

    I remember some would grow up so fast, everyone who saw them would say “oh, I remember when you were so small, how did you get so big!”. Now it’s just a bit different… more like “I remember when you were skinny… Did you know that at some point, it makes no difference if you walk through the door sideways or not?”.

    #1988774
    ujm
    Participant

    Growing up I used to sit in a high chair with a pacifier after finishing my baby food.

    #1988784
    Sam Klein
    Participant

    I work for Peter pan whose my father so I will always stay young and never grow up.

    Have fun growing up without me or my dad Peter pan

    #1988785
    IYK
    Participant

    When I was growing up, imagination was fostered. All of a sudden, if someone uses imagination, people fear they might drive a car while imagining they’re not driving.

    #1988790
    eishis chayil
    Participant

    ALL POSTERS: i really meant it as in childhood memories remembering and sharing stories from your parent’s discipline and punishments growing up in their home

    I don’t know if you are trolling or sincere but I  believe it’s time to move on from this topic.

    #1988807
    IYK
    Participant

    I’m okay not sharing too much. But I remember being beaten with metal, leather, it didn’t matter. Anything was seen as a possible weapon to be used against me. I remember being deprived of food, having to sleep sitting without a pillow or blanket. I feared hunger so much that I couldn’t eat slowly and enjoy food because I was afraid it might not satisfy my hunger long enough to last until the next time I’d have food. I remember being forced to hurt myself, or face more pain. Religious beliefs were used to control me even more, as a form of psychological abuse. Fear was so embedded in me that Jewish music causes me pain to this day. All Jewish music is religious in nature, so how would you feel if everywhere you go reminds you of the abuse? I’ve been through therapy for over 11 years now and I’m still working in trauma therapy to try to overcome the psychological abuses, while living with reminders everywhere I turn in the Jewish community. In my days, no one would listen, so everyone was complicit. Judaism failed me. Humanity failed me. To this day, I see every human as a potential danger to me. All I can do is adapt to live among a society that does not want to change. As they still don’t want to change, it is impossible for me to make a difference as the saying goes, “you can bring a horse to the water, but you cannot make it drink”.
    You wanted to know, now you heard my horror story. One that I face for the rest of my wretched life. But at least, I don’t try to relive those memories all the time. I’d rather learn to enjoy the positive opportunities life still has to offer me. So yes, I go to trauma therapy. But I connect more with dogs and horses than humans, as I know they understand more than humans do.

    #1988850
    commonsaychel
    Participant

    “I don’t know if you are trolling or sincere ”

    There is a microscopically thin line between being brilliantly creative and acting like the most gigantic idiot on earth.

    Cynthia Heimel

    #1988988
    Decency is Key
    Participant

    ***These days when someone imagines something everyone else needs to pretend it’s reality to avoid hurting their feelings.

    #1988994
    AviraDeArah
    Participant

    I think she’s unconsciously trolling

    #1989024
    johnklets
    Participant

    Eishis: In my home there was a fair of petsh, though it was given to me only about a handful of times in all my chikdhood. Standing in corner was also an option when we were little.

    #1989034
    commonsaychel
    Participant

    @IYK “In my days, no one would listen, so everyone was complicit. Judaism failed me. Humanity failed me. To this day, I see every human as a potential danger to me. All I can do is adapt to live among a society that does not want to change”
    Guess what, I got petch from my parents, the Rebbe, the Principal, I got an injection in my rear, I had rectal temps taken and I didnt grow up blaming everyone, I hold down a demanding job, got married and own my own home

    #1989052
    IYK
    Participant

    commonsaychel:
    Was your life sabotaged by your own parents to the point that you couldn’t get up? Clearly not. Let’s talk real here. You hold a job, got married, own a house. How did you pay for that house? Who put the down payment towards it? Did you pay it all yourself? Or did you have help, community support. You got married, so now you possibly have dual income to assist with that. In addition, community support to make sure you can support her as well. You’re not all alone. The one job I was offered, my parents approved of because it made them look good. No one ever asked me what I wanted. It was all to force me to submit to their rule. I guess, you submitted, were supported because you did. When I wanted to take college courses, my parents didn’t pay for it, I did. I worked hard to pay off my debts, to be responsible, all the while money being mooched off of me from the community for one cause or the other. But when I wanted to take the next step to open a business, my parents disowned me, my community offered no support, I ate the ice off the road because I was hungry. I had nowhere to stay, I slept on park benches, on the ground in parking lots, ignored by my own Jewish “brothers”. I was made vulnerable, attacked at work, one coworker even attempted to murder me. I was working for a Jew. Who then pressed along with my parents to have me put in a mental institution, just to destroy me. I had to fight in court for the right to control my own money. I then used some of it to save a stranger’s marriage and take his home out of forclosure. To this day, I have no clue who the guy is, all I know, he was Jewish. I have a name as a danger to society so I have no legal right to own a firearm. No right to defend myself. If I were to get married, I’d have to go to court to fight for the right to raise my own kids. The only one fighting for me is Hashem. I received a letter recently telling me that there are many in need of help for food in the community, asking for my help. Why do you think this happens? Hashem works Midah kineged midah. Miami, people are homeless now. Why do you think this happens?  I now have a home I call my own. Why do you think this is? Midah kineged Midah. When Jews shirk responsibility for each other, Hashem picks up the tab. Because of what I went through, I said my final prayers, ingested something that was guaranteed to kill me. I fell asleep, yet woke up totally unaffected. Hashem wants me alive for a reason. I walked and prayed Hashem should hit me with a tree to just end my suffering. A tree instantly came down where I had been standing 30 seconds earlier. Most people believe in themselves as to the reason they are where they are in life. I’m only here because Hashem wants me here. Good night.

    edited

    #1989130
    johnklets
    Participant

    Common saychel: You got injection in the rear and rectal temps as part of punishment ? If not i don’t understand why you mentioned it, this was normal in my times.

    #1989159
    commonsaychel
    Participant

    @johnklets, the OP wrote that we should share our unpleasant childhood memories, so I listed two, and thoses had nothing to do with punishments,
    @IYK I could not follow your long rant other then you were in and out of pyc hospitals, the little I was able to understand I will answer, I worked FT and went to school at night, got my degree and worked in corperate America, I had my own bank account since I was 16 and my down payment for my house came from my savings plus a 5000 loan from my sister and a 10,000 gift from my wifes grandmother.
    I dont like to talk about my personal life but after your rant I need to show you there is a thing call self sufficiency, my wife’s grandmother lost both parents in the camps, and she came out a 19 yr old orpha, she got married and set up a life of her own.

    #1989184
    IYK
    Participant

    At least society recognizes that there is alternative to rectal thermometers. Injections in the rear are still done today, because that’s a fairly large muscle in the body. The muscle absorbs the medication, so sometimes depending on the medication, society has no alternative yet. However, there are alternatives to violence for raising children, yet society over all is still resorting to violence. Why? (Why, is a question that is judging) what is the cause? (What, is seeking a solution) It’s so frustrating that just because someone was wronged, they cannot hold back from wronging others, refuse to improve themselves. This action is a sign of failure to properly raise a child. If you take the action to be violent to a child because you experienced violence yourself, the justification is flawed. You have the ability to find alternatives to violence, to work on your personal emotions and gain control over them instead of allowing the emotions to control you.

    #1989195
    IYK
    Participant

    The lesson of chad gadya is, that there is always someone bigger or stronger than you. When one gets attacked by the biggest and strongest of them all, Hashem is even bigger and stronger. There is no need to prove greatness. If there is a chain reaction of suffering and pain, eventually Hashem will end all pain and suffering. Bimhera Biyameinu.

    #1989247
    IYK
    Participant

    commonseychel:
    What you don’t understand is, even you were helped. There is no getting up from where I’ve been put down. By laws of nature, I should be dead now. I only have a bed to sleep in, because someone I cared about very much died and their furniture was offered to me. I’m only getting up because there is a greater force picking me up. Probably because I was wronged by others. So much so, that unlike Holocaust survivors, I still have to fight for what you consider normal life.

    #1989254
    IYK
    Participant

    I also want to point out, that the furniture was offered to me, but the bed was already in the trash. I had to take it out of the trash. I sleep on a quality bed that was thrown away. Quality people get thrown away as well. I was a quality person, destroyed. Made into nothing. But there is a plan in this world, I know I’m part of it. If not, Hashem would not be raising me from destruction. From a place where nobody has returned. As it says, meashpos yarim evyon.

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