guest for yom tov brings chametzdik cake, puts it on the table

Burn it.

Something similar happened to someone I know. I didn’t hear what they did, other than stop inviting such guests. 🙁

I can tell you what not to do

DONT GET ANGRY and yell

Its likely the person is not religious and maybe is on a journey to frumkite and really meant well. Best to quietly dispose of the cake and explain nicely and calmly why it was wrong

mik: You’re going to leave the chometz cake on the table for the rest of Yom Tov?

Happened to us 20 years ago. My late cousin’s wife came with her sons for the seder. She walks in and places a ‘Passover cake’ on the sideboard in the dining room. My wife took a quick look and saw that it was from a non-kosher bakery. She quickly thanked our guest, explained that tonight’s menu was already set and instructed the eldest daughter to place the cake in the garage where it would stay cool. Daughter picked up the cake in its box along with the cloth that was on the sideboard and walked to the garage. Somehow the cake managed to end up in the compost heap behind the garage.

After Yuntif, we sent a lovely note thanking cousin in law for the cake.

We couldn’t get upset with her. She was not brought up with any religious knowledge. Her husband passed away leaving two young sons and the annual sedarim at our home were their only connection to their Jewish heritage and our side of the family. Wife explained that we eat so much rich food for the holidays that we only serve fresh fruit for dessert. The following year she brought a bunch of bananas.

Golfer,

No the two young sons did not grow up/end up as Frum Yidden. However, they have remained Jewish and married Jewish women. They and their still widowed mother and the boys’ children were all guests at our Seder Table. They arrived dressed for Yuntif and looking forward to their yearly dose of Yiddishkeit and mixing with the remnants of their late fathers’ family. They also brought lots of bananas.

As a segue, there had been a thread about family minhagim at the seder table. Traditionally, on the first night we host our immediate family and my wife’s relatives. The second night we have relatives from my side of the family. We cook recipes and special dishes that have come down on the particular side of the family for each night. In the drawer where we keep the guest Haggadot we have a collection of yarmulkes for the non-frum guests. They are from weddings and B’nai Mitzvah going back more than 50 years. We match guests with yarmulkes from their weddings, Bar Mitzvah or those of their deceased parents and grandparents. These two boys got a thrill when they were first given a chance to wear a yarmulke from their late father’s Bar Mitzvah or parents’ wedding, now each has a young son who proudly wears those yarmulkes at our seder and talks how they can’t wait to come back and be connected with their ancestors again.

We also use kiddush cups and other items that go back as many as 7 generations, and all the charoset is ground by hand in a brass mortar and pestle that my Great-Great grandmother bought when she arrived in America back in 1872 and had to make Pesach in a new land.

Very nice story.

We have non religious guests over, and we even had non-Jews over this year for the first seder (Shabbos, avoids any issues of cooking on yom tov for a goy). I told them that if they wanted to bring something, they should just bring themselves and a willingness to read in English parts of Magid.

We’ve had so many issues with people not knowing. Even if you give them explicit instructions in terms of what’s acceptable, they still don’t get it 99% of the time.

I serve dessert at the seder for those guests who find macaroons and jelly rings an integral part of the Pesach experience, but I do explain that they shouldn’t fill up, since we have to eat the Afikoman with an appetite, and I tell them we’re not permitted to eat anything after the afikoman.

There’s a lot you can do with bananas for Pesach.

We made banana pancakes this year, a recipe that involves just bananas, eggs, vanilla, a little sugar, and whatever other goodies you want to add. There’s also Yonanas Ice Cream, a perfect natural, parve treat made from just bananas and whatver flavors you want to add. Good item for Pesach all around.

we use coca cola on pesach. somehow, and i am surprised it got past us, a non pesachdik bottle got in to the case. When one of the kids found it on yontiff (they noticed the red cap as opposed to the yellow) they hid it under something somewhere. unfortunately, when making slurpees (we put coke into our ice cream maker for a chol hamoed treat) one of the kids didn’t want to believe we were out of coke and put in a search worthy of bedikas chometz. well they were very excited to find one last bottle! Fortunately, a second child noticed the cap before they made the slurpees, but unfortunately it was after they poured it into the freezing bowl.

Goldilocks…………………..

You can ask and ask and ask that guest not bring any food or gift, BUT people who were brought up properly do not arrive empty handed.

Thus, we tell them the menu is set, the cooking is done, but it would be very helpful if you could pick up a bag of ice. They feel they are both bringing something, helping us out, in that we don’t have to leave preparations and go shop erev Yuntif/Shabbos.

And we never have to explain that we eat this hecksher and not that, or from this bakery and not that. Or even worse, the home you think is kosher isn’t up to our standards.

Sam, it would be rov of the slurpee.