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  • #1176887
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Sparkly: “and thats the MAIN reason why im becoming a pharmacist to find a cure for that sibling and that made me want to become a pharmacist”

    That is really special! I hope the sibling has a refuah shelaima!

    #1176888

    thats the MAIN reason why im becoming a

    pharmacist to find a cure for that sibling

    I hope you are not setting yourself up for disappointment.

    Have you discussed this with anyone? (Please don’t take

    my personal pessimism too seriously, though.)

    #1176889

    First of all sparkly I didn’t mean I’m jealous…..I Baruch hashem have long nice hair I just meant for urself you shouldn’t flaunt the way u did

    LU I honestly have no patience to argue

    #1176890
    Sparkly
    Member

    lilmod ulelamaid – yes you are! while others like me have to go to college. so lucky you! my parents dont want me to become a teacher and my mom was a teacher! they said because it cost so much to become a teacher and you dont make that much as a teacher so its not worth it.

    #1176891
    Sparkly
    Member

    Happygirlygirl – b’h glad to here:)

    #1176892
    absan
    Participant

    Sparkly you are so sweet you have so much toychin . Unbelievaeble

    you are struggling through college to learn sceince for the sake of finding cure for a family member. You are much better than I and so many others..In this zachis Hashem should listen to your prayers and help you be a good shaliach to find the right med. to help jewish children.

    p.s. just always remember the cure comes from hashem he just chooses the right shalich and may you be one of them.

    #1176894
    Sparkly
    Member

    absan – amen. thats what i pray to G-d every day to ask for.

    #1176895
    absan
    Participant

    Happygirlgirl my full sympathy to you and so thankful you made it b”h and you joined us here in this cr. You are a big addition for us all.

    #1176896
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    LU I honestly have no patience to argue

    Great! Happy to hear it! Halacha is not a game.

    #1176897
    Mammele
    Participant

    Sparkly: you can braid your hair if you think it may be too long but don’t want to cut it. Assuming you can find a hair style that suits you but doesn’t look babyish. Corn-braid maybe? Just putting it out there.

    Refuah Sheleima bekurov to your sibling!

    #1176898
    Sparkly
    Member

    lilmod ulelamaid- no its not. i thought halacha teachers were suppose to be VERY religious like no internet? why do you have internet?

    Mammele – amen! no one comments on my long hair besides to get it dyed and styled since i like leaving it in a pony tail and never doing anything to it.

    #1176899
    WinnieThePooh
    Participant

    Sparkly, I think it’s great that you want to do research to help cure cancer. But you should realize that pharmacists don’t do research- they dispense the medicines that other people have developed and tested. If you really want to do research, whether clinical or basic science, then you should consider a slightly different track- continue taking science courses at the undergrad level as you are doing, and then you would have to do a PhD program in biology, or maybe medicinal chemistry, but since you said you don’t like chemistry, I would think a biology track would be better. With an MsC, you can get a job in a drug company, for example, but you won’t be doing much- more technical work. You would need a PhD to do any real research- either in academia or in biotech/pharma. Or, to make things harder, an MD/PhD if you really want to do clinical cancer research.

    I know all about this because once-upon-a-time I also considered being a pharmacist as a practical profession, but then realized that I really could not see myself standing all day putting pills in bottle. I also really wanted to do research, especially in drug action, so then I considered pharmacology, which eventually led me to my current field. I work for a basic biology lab that studies tumor suppressors and other processes involved in cancer. I/we have not found a cure for cancer, nor do we expect to, but we have contributed to the body of knowledge to help us understand how cancer and other diseases develop.

    And by the way, long hair, even in a pony, in a lab is a hazard, you would need to put it up! (see, this wasn’t off topic afterall)

    Long hair will also be problematic when you are married, both for being able to cover it adequately, and for mikve. Since you want to be married soon, you might want to get used to the idea of parting with the long hair.

    #1176900
    Sparkly
    Member

    WinnieThePooh – A pharmacologist is according to learn.org “Pharmacology is the study of toxicology and drugs. As a pharmacologist, you’ll be a type of medical scientist, and you’ll work in laboratories testing the effects of drugs on the human body. You’ll study how drugs are absorbed into the human system and how they medically react in the body. You may also study how drugs work in animals. You’ll develop new drugs by adding and subtracting ingredients until you reach the desired effect of the new drug.” According to chron.com a pharmacist is “Pharmacists may follow career tracks that provide opportunities beyond dispensing prescription drugs in a store. Pharmacists also conduct extensive research into new drugs and their reactions. Pharmacists in academia delve into the research behind the discovery and testing of new medicines. In pharmaceutical companies, pharmacists often are employed to oversee research projects”.

    #1176901
    Meno
    Participant

    Sparkly,

    That was your best post ever. I’m proud of you.

    #1176902
    Sparkly
    Member

    Meno – thats insulting…

    #1176903
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Sparkly – I think that was a compliment! That’s how I took it!

    And Meno, that was your best post ever. I’m proud of you! (and don’t tell me now that you’re insulted…)

    #1176904
    Sparkly
    Member

    lilmod ulelamaid – i took it in a way meaning that the ones before were no good.

    #1176905
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Sparkly – I don’t know; I hear what you’re saying, but I still took it as a compliment. Do you think Meno should be insulted because I told him that was his best post ever?

    #1176906
    charliehall
    Participant

    “our gedolim of today made it HALCHA!”

    That is not true. They can establish new minhagim that might be binding for their own communities but no single rabbi has the power to actually change halachah in our times.

    “But you should realize that pharmacists don’t do research”

    This is not true; I personally know pharmacists who do research. They work in pharmaceutical research labs and in hospitals. Good luck!

    #1176907
    charliehall
    Participant

    I dated someone who had very, very long hair. Periodically she would cut it short and donate the hair to a charity that provided wigs for women with cancer, and then grow it long again so she could repeat that wonderful tzedakah.

    #1176908
    Sparkly
    Member

    lilmod ulelamaid – you did it out of sarcasm so its different.

    #1176909
    Sparkly
    Member

    charliehall – i know MANY girls who do that!!

    #1176910
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Sparkly – I was actually completely serious! I’m sorry if it sounded sarcastic. And I really am curious to know if he was insulted.

    #1176911
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Charlie Hall “”our gedolim of today made it HALCHA!”

    That is not true. They can establish new minhagim that might be binding for their own communities but no single rabbi has the power to actually change halachah in our times.”

    Very true, and that is the point I was trying to make. Thank you Charlie! It is crucial to know the difference between halacha and minhag. I was very concerned, HGG, about the fact that you think this is halacha yet you stated that you don’t keep it. If it really were halacha, not keeping it would NOT be an option.

    That statement illustrated to me the dangers of misrepresenting minhagim as halacha. When someone thinks that all of the minhagim or hiddurim are halachos, they feel that they can’t keep all of it, so they develop a lax attitude to halacha since they think it’s impossible to keep everything.

    If they would know which things are clear-cut black & white halachos, they would realize that even if they aren’t yet up to keeping all of the minhagim, it is not so hard to keep all the halachos (while gradually working on the minhagim/hidurim). They would realize what a serious thing it is to not keep an actual halacha and they would never think of saying the words, “it’s halacha, but I don’t keep it.”

    Tznius is more complicated as I pointed out, but there still are things that are black & white halachos handed down from Chazal and written in the Shulchan Aruch and things that are not.

    #1176912
    Sparkly
    Member

    lilmod ulelamaid – you are a halacha teacher and MOST halacha teachers are very STRICT when it comes to things like tznius. so i wouldnt be surprised to see you dressed EXTREMELY tznius not even for a second your skirt is touching your knee. out of curiosity how long does your skirt need to be besides for what my rav says what is your opinion?

    #1176913
    WinnieThePooh
    Participant

    Re pharmacists- I stand corrected that pharmacists do not do research; when I was investigating it, I never came across that option and was advised that to do research you need a PhD in a basic or applied science. I imagine that pharmacists that do research do further training beyond the BPharm? I know there are masters programs for pharmacy. But still, I imagine that the type of research that a pharmacist does is somewhat different than a PhD scientist, because of their different training backgrounds. Developing a drug for any disease will involve many steps- identifying the biological aspect that causes the disease, figuring out how to correct that, screening for/generating a drug that accomplishes that action, then testing the drug, studying its pharmacokinetics, mode of delivery, bioavailability, effective dosage, performing clinical trials, etc etc. I would imagine that the pharmacist would play a role in these later stage, but that is just a guess. I had previously thought this was the realm of pharmacologists. Sparkly, do you have more info on this?

    #1176914
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Sparkly, your skirt has to be long enough that your knees will not show AT ALL in any position, whether you are sitting or walking or getting into a car. As I pointed out earlier, this means that that it HAS to be at least 4 inches below your knee, and most of the time a lot more. For a straight skirt, it has to be a lot more than that in order to ensure that your knees are covered AT ALL TIMES.

    I think that some girls may be nechshol BECAUSE of the 4- inch rule. Instead of checking if their knees are covered at all times, they assume that as long as their skirts are 4 inches, they are okay, and that is not necessarily the case.

    One pitfall that I have noticed is that sometimes girls/women will buy skirts that cover their knees as long as they don’t cross their legs, and they think that they will never cross their legs so it will be okay, but then without thinking, they forget and cross their legs.

    Another pitfall is that some skirts are fine until you get in a car and start driving.

    Another pitfall is that getting into cars makes your skirt go up, so you have to make sure that your skirt is long enough that your knees do not show when you get into a car. (personally, I never let my friend’s husband give me a ride unless I am wearing a REALLY long skirt, because when he drives me, I have to sit in the back seat, and the back seat of their minivan has a very high step).

    Another pitfall, IMHO, (and I know that there are people who will disagree with this) is that nowadays it has become fairly widely accepted that most people wear stockings/tights as opposed to knee-his. I personally feel that people are sometimes less careful about letting their knees show because they think that it’s not such a big deal because they are wearing stockings. I wonder if they would be more careful if they were wearing knee his. The counter-argument that some might have is that some might feel that it has become minhag hamakom to wear stockings. In any case, stockings or not, you have to make sure that your knees are covered at all times. In Rav Bodner’s sefer on hilchos brachos, he writes that the difference between your knees showing with or w/o stockings is that if you are wearing stockings, a man does not have to turn around to make a bracha, he only has to close his eyes or look down (I hope that was quoted accurately – I don’t have the sefer on me – but I do know that it was a very small difference, and either way it is still a BIG problem).

    Another pet peeve of mine: people who think it is untznius to wear long skirts, and meanwhile, they and many others wear skirts that are not long enough to make sure their knees are covered at all times. WEAR LONG SKIRTS, AS LONG AS YOU WANT – it is for sure one thousand times better than your knees showing, IMHO! (okay, MAYBE, they shouldn’t go all the way to the floor – I don’t know- but even that is better than your knees showing).

    End of rant.

    #1176915
    Sima Batsheva
    Participant

    I just saw the original question. I assume Sparkly is single because for a married lady the question is irrelevant. We all know that the holy Zohar advise all married ladies – not just chassidim – to not let a single hair be seen even to the walls of their house. The accepted way to achieve this is to shave off all the hair.

    #1176916
    Meno
    Participant

    LU,

    Thank you for the compliment. I wasn’t insulted.

    #1176917
    Sparkly
    Member

    Sima Batsheva – maybe i am married and dont cover my hair?!?!

    #1176918
    Sparkly
    Member

    WinnieThePooh – i am getting a pharmD and maybe even a phd in pharmacy and with a pharmD you are ALLOWED to do research. so i guess you were referring to something different than me.

    #1176919
    Sparkly
    Member

    lilmod ulelamaid – you are TOO religious for me! i ALWAYS wear leggings under my skirt so that when it does go up which very often it does no one can see anything or very slight difference since i like wearing skirts that go around my knees.

    #1176921
    Meno
    Participant

    “maybe i am married and don’t cover my hair”

    Well then maybe you should shave it all off

    (I’m not suggesting you should do this, I’m just saying according to Sima Batsheva, this may be the right thing to do)

    Side question: Sima Batsheva, if they shave off all their hair, why do they still cover their heads?

    #1176922
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Meno:”side question: Sima Batsheva, if they shave off all their hair, why do they still cover their heads?”

    Meno, if you hair was shaved, wouldn’t you want to cover it (especially if you were a lady)? Besides, from a halachic perspective, the hair is constantly growing in, and you wouldn’t be able to shave it the second a hair pops up.

    #1176923
    charliehall
    Participant

    “We all know that the holy Zohar advise all married ladies – not just chassidim – to not let a single hair be seen even to the walls of their house.”

    And the halachah is not according to the zohar. A married woman is not required to have any headcovering in her own house.

    “The accepted way to achieve this is to shave off all the hair. “

    Only in some communities, particularly those with Hungarian roots.

    #1176925
    Sparkly
    Member

    Meno – im NOT married but when i do get married its up to my husband if i cover my hair or not. so for example right now i have 2 shidduchim with 2 wonderful guys b’h so 1 wants me to cover my hair the other doesnt so if either shidduch works out its up to them NOT me.

    #1176926
    Meno
    Participant

    Sparkly,

    You’re not married? I thought you said you are.

    Maybe I’m just confusing you with someone else.

    #1176927
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Sparkly:

    ” Meno – im NOT married but when i do get married its up to my husband if i cover my hair or not. so for example right now i have 2 shidduchim with 2 wonderful guys b’h so 1 wants me to cover my hair the other doesnt so if either shidduch works out its up to them NOT me.”

    Sparkly, according to halacha, it is up to you, not your husband. You have the bechira to choose your husband, and the responsibility to choose a husband who will not pressure you to stop keeping halacha. If you do end up marrying such a person, it is still in your hands to keep halacha.

    I have a friend whose cousin covers her hair even though her husband tells her every day how ugly she looks (can’t even imagine how much schar she will get for covering her hair under those circumstances!), but I wouldn’t advise marrying someone like that l’chatchila (at the time she got married, she thought that covering your hair was a chumra so she didn’t start covering her hair until many years later when she found out it was an actual halacha).

    #1176928
    Sparkly
    Member

    lilmod ulelamaid – i DIDNT mean a guy who would start calling me ugly because no matter what im wearing if my husband starts calling me ugly i think his asking for a divorce. i meant a guy who his mother and sisters DONT cover their hair even tho believe it or not his sister dresses VERY tzniusly (she covers her elbows, collar bone and knees at all times! and she DOESNT cover her hair and shes married with kids!) his the type to leave it up to me to decide and i am the type to be like if your being lenient on me than ill do what your sisters do which is not cover their hair. his rabbi told the sister that if the sheitel bothers her which it did NOT to cover her hair!! and his rav would be my rav and thats the kind of rav i would have and so basically id be told NOT to cover my hair since in reality who likes covering their hair all day long?!?!

    #1176929
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Sparkly – you’re missing the point. The point is that it is Halacha. As I’ve told you before, Halacha does not change just because you were able to find someone who calls himself a Rabbi and does not accept Halacha.

    If this “Rabbi” says that you don’t have to cover your hair, he is not an Orthodox Rabbi and people who follow him are not Orthodox and you should not be dating them!!!

    #1176930
    Sparkly
    Member

    lilmod ulelamaid – thats NOT true he is orthodox and PLEASE DONT say stuff like that about people when its false that is clear cut motzei shamra and my mother is okay with me dating him and considers him religious and i also do. he keeps shabbos and kosher and other stuff even if his okay with his wife not covering her hair.

    #1176931
    Abba_S
    Participant

    Does having long hair increase the possibility of contaminating a sterile environment? Germs may attach themselves to the strands of hair and when the hair falls out contaminate what it lands on. I know food handlers must wear hairnets, does it also apply to pharmacist compounding new drugs in a lab? I think the longer the hair, the more likely it is to fall out.

    #1176932
    Lilmod Ulelamaid
    Participant

    Sparkly – I am just telling you what the Torah says.

    As I have told you many times before, any Rabbi who denies a halacha is an Apikorus. Kefira is one of the biggest aveiros. Please stop spreading your Kefiradik views.

    If you say that this Rabbi denies that one is obligated to cover her hair, YOU are saying that he is an Apikorus! If in fact this is Motzi Shem Ra, and you were saying things about him that are not true, as you have done in the past about your own Rabbi, please correct them, as soon as possible.

    #1176933
    Sparkly
    Member

    lilmod ulelamaid – i am NOT going to correct stuff like that. this is what she told me and i am NOT putting words in her mouth. you are VERY insulting to start calling people apikorsim because their more lenient than you are. if i get permission not to cover my hair thats my issue NOT yours. i just dont like the idea that youll call me an apikorses because i dont cover my hair. besides for the fact out of the 2 guys im MUCH more likely going to end up with the one who DOES want me to cover my hair.

    #1176934

    I have to agree with LU

    Sparkly- first for all im sure u know the story of the woman who the walls I her hohdr never saw her hair and she was zoche to have 7 kohanim gedolim so therefore we know the Torah endorses it…..now a side point a married woman’s hair is considered ervah and a man may not make a bracha in front of u and if he does his bracha is livatala …you don’t like that response? The truth hurts.

    #1176935
    Little Froggie
    Participant

    L. uL.

    You might be missing one point. Maybe she’s writing about going uncovered IN PRIVATE. Which, as you know, al pi din is permissible.

    That’s the down side to the coffee room, people don’t necessarily explain themselves adequately. Sometimes posters ave very ambiguous. Otherwise you’re definitely right.

    #1176936
    Sparkly
    Member

    Happygirlygirl – truth DOESNT hurt since i have a VERY yeshivish brother who kicks out any married lady that isnt covering her hair, or wearing not tznius clothes so he can make a bracha. it DOESNT bother me so leave for a few seconds big deal its NOT like its the WHOLE day!!

    #1176937
    Sparkly
    Member

    Little Froggie – i have married sisters and they do NOT cover their hair. ill be honest the ONLY reason why i want to cover my hair is since i HATE my hair!! when i see someone covering their hair not dressed so tzniusly it makes me think she doesnt like her hair because the reason why i want to cover my hair is because i dont like it.

    #1176938
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    As I have told you many times before, any Rabbi who denies a halacha is an Apikorus.

    Many sefardim state that not eating fish and dairy together is a halacha. Does that make the rest of us bagels-cream-cheese-and-lox Jews apikorsim?

    (And before tries to say that it isn’t “halacha,” I’ll grant that they are correct — it’s more than halacha, as per the dictum of “sakanta chamura m’issura.”).

    The Wolf

    #1176939
    Little Froggie
    Participant

    Sparkly – you remind me of Frogette, she was waiting for her Chuppah from the day she grew hair!!!

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