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A recent problem has arisen where I daven Mincha. An elderly, hard-of-hearing gentleman has started davening a bit too loudly and is disturbing those of us nearby. I feel funny asking him to quiet down. Naturally, he doesn’t hear himself davening loudly. He also wouldn’t hear us shushing him during Shemoneh Esrei.
Waiting for suggestions, l’shem shomayaim.
I assume he only became hard of hearing later in life. Is he visually impaired as well? I doubt he would mind if someone told him he was too loud, or was unaware it was Shmoneh Esray.
Remember, that unless you die first, most people end up with limited hearing and/or vision.
Be happy that you not only have the opportunity to put more effort into davening with kavana, but you get the side benefit of being a mentch! (Oh, and don’t say anything, in case that wasn’t clear.)
Frumguy
If its so loud that its truly bothering a few people not just the guy standing next to him then maybe its an issue. If you really can’t focus maybe have the gabbai or another older person speak to him. However in my experience the noise distracting me is not the loud Daveners but rather the kfitzas haderchniks who start shmoozing the second they finish Shemoneh esrei.
Pick a different spot.
“I’ve had this Makom Kavua for over 16 years.”
So be matir hanhagah and move to a different place for the next 16 years. Do not do anything that might possibly embarrass this Jew.
Find a rov or someone that can tactfully explain to him that it’s likely halachically problematic to daven this loud (???? ??’ ??). Some hold of the zohar that we should enunciate the words yet not make them audible to the ear, perhaps a rov would matir him to do this from now on.
Failing that, the point of a mokoim kevuah is to aid concentration, in this case it isn’t, so you’d have to consider moving.
Otherwise try earplugs. (Seriously. One Rosh Hashana the guy behind me was davening too loudly and it being yom hadin and there is a certain minhag to do so, I discreetly put my fingers in my ears under my talis for much of shmone esrei.)
I was honestly disturbed to even see this question. As a daughter of people who are deaf I am offended. You obviously don’t realize what a bracha it is that this man has the ability and the knowledge to daven. Leave the man alone and thank G-d during every Tefilla for the gift of hearing.
Wife M-
++1
Thanks for writing that.
I can sympathize with Mr Frum, since I also have a hard time having proper kavana when I daven. But he needs to figure out a way to solve his problem without involving this elderly gentleman. And I hope your reply will go a long way towards getting him set on the right course of action.
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