- This topic has 16 replies, 8 voices, and was last updated 13 years, 3 months ago by .
-
Posts
-
Lets see how many homophonens we can list here.
male – mail
main – mane – Meine
flower – flour
won – one
to – too – two
three – tree
four – for
eight – ate
plane – plain
meet – meat
bored – board
where – were
here – hair – hear – hare – heir – her
dairy – dirty
no – know
not – knot
new – knew
by – buy
I – eye
ear – air
fare – fair
How many homophones does it take to change a lightbulb?
their-there-they’re
weight-weight
sore-soar
dear-deer
chair-cheer
hour-our
ball-bawl
new-gnu
suit-soot (stretching a little-depends how you say the second word)
threw-through
From: The Miracle of Language by Richard Lederer
One night a knight on a hoarse horse
Road out upon a road.
This male wore mail for war and would
Explore a road that glowed.
His tale I’ll tell from head to tail.
I’ll write his rite up right.
hidden site our hero found,
a sight that I shall cite.
With woe he shouted , “Whoa!” as rain
Without a break did reign.
To brake, he pulled the rein, and like
A shattered pane felt pain.
The poor knight met a witch, which made
Sweat pour from every pore.
He’d never seen a scene like that.
His sore heart couldn’t soar.
Then they a game for truffles played,
In which he mined her mind.
To prove who was the better bettor
And find who should be fined.
He won one twice, he won two, too.
To grate on her felt great.
To wrest the rest, he went for four,
And, at the fore, ate eight.
Due to her loss, the mourning witch,
Her truffles missed. I know no way,
Do I, to weigh her rue.
As a swarm of scared fleas flees.
He heard a herd of dear deer pray
The pleas of prey: “Please, please.”
A grisly grizzly bear, all bare,
and a hare that had no hair
And a foul fowl bawled that they were bald.
In their pink skins they stood there.
The knight did see a blue whale wail
As it blew out plumes of sea.
“Yoo hoo, you who come riding here,
Please hear and pity me.”
Our knight began to reel, for real,
The world whirled, so to speak.
All the days of the week his sole soul felt
The dizzy daze of the weak.
Our heir to knighthood gave it up.
He felt the fare not fair.
His wholly holy sword soared up
As he threw it through the air.
To end our tale draws nigh.
Without ado, I bid adieu,
So by your leave, bye-bye.
have you heard the one about the man who bequeathed his offspring a cattle ranch and named it Focus?– because it’s the place where the sons raise meat.
And here are some heterophones:
computer- telphone
car- quickly
vicarious- generic
table- incomplete
composting- incandescent
I didn’t even know they had special phones!
“I crack a window and feel the cool air cleanse my every pore, as I pour my poor heart out” – Open Road Song by Eve 6
Liberace
Oscar Wilde
Rock Hudson
Rudolph Nureyev….oops wrong list
I was hoping I would think of one before somebody asked.
Sorry.
Can you make one up?
oh please, who let the 10-year old boys into the Coffee Room?
peer-pair
poor-pour
it takes four (two to) change a lightbulb
There are a variety of answers to:
How many homophones does it take to change a light bulb?
the answer could be “won ore too.” or maybe “for” or could be “ate” or possibly “nun.”
PBA; Originally. It’s a Polish joke. “How many Poles does it take to change a light bulb”?! Three. One to to hold the bulb. Two to twist the ladder! Another version. “Ten”. One to change the bulb. Nine to watch.
>>>oh please, who let the 10-year old boys into the Coffee Room?<<<
I was referring to the tone of the jokes by mikehall and AOM. Definitely Heder Boy quality jokes.
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.