Hotels for Pesach

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  • #595872

    Who actually goes to one of these things? I’m reading the Jewish press and there’s like 20 pages of advertisements for this hotel with this chef and that rabbi and the other singer. And who can actually afford these things??

    Obviously,some can afford it because there are so many advertisements.

    Too bad I’m not one of them…..

    #752547
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    Who actually goes to one of these things?

    And who can actually afford these things??

    Obviously,some can afford it because there are so many advertisements.

    So, you’ve answered your own questions. 🙂 Not much more to do here then…

    The Wolf

    #752548
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    Who actually goes to one of these things?

    The eirev rav.

    Heh heh. Was that over the top?

    #752549
    aries2756
    Participant

    Here we go again!

    #752550

    PBA- I’m liking you more these days! Am I allowed to say that here?!

    And yes,a bit over the top,but Im kinda with you,up there…

    #752551

    Aries-what does that mean?? Was this discussed already? If so,I must’ve missed it. I was asking sincerely.

    #752552

    sometimes you see the same singers in more than one hotel and they all say “for all 8 days…” what does that mean?

    #752553
    anon1m0us
    Participant

    I went a few times. It was awesome. Those who never went to one have no idea what they are missing.

    #752554
    cshapiro
    Member

    me me me…!!!

    its funny cause my boss also goes away…hello how many woman accountants make pesach?!?!?

    #752555
    commonsense
    Participant

    anon, I’m willing to try if your’e willing to sponsor

    #752556

    Let’s be dan l’chaf zechus.

    Some people go away because they are dealing with illness and their Pesach at hotel is funded by good hearted people.

    Some people go away because their apartment/home is not big enough to fit everyone.

    Some people go away because they have no family this way it’s more pleasant.

    Some people go away for Shalom Bayis reasons.

    For some people this is their once a year vacation.

    Remember, Hashem gave us all one nose and stuck it on our face and that’s where it belongs, not in other peoples business!

    Believe me it’s probably very nice to have someone wait on you and relax! Each person is entitled to do as they feel as long as they don’t owe anyone any money!!!

    #752557
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    Hashem gave us all one nose and stuck it on our face and that’s where it belongs, not in other peoples business!

    My nose is long enough to be on my nose, and in other people’s business!

    #752558
    aries2756
    Participant

    Yes this was discussed before as well as other things that some people do and some people don’t. Yes there are people who can afford to do things that other people can’t. People choose to go to hotels and others choose to stay home. Each have the right to choose as they wish and WE do NOT have the right to judge. Each one of us have our own personal reasons for doing what we choose to do as well as the Rabbonim that go, the singers that go, the people that go and the caterers and families that run these programs. Why bring it up or make choizek of it?

    #752559
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    there are people who can afford to do things that other people can’t. People choose to go to hotels and others choose to stay home.

    And this little piggy went wee wee wee wee all the way home.

    (Sorry, I had to.)

    #752560
    cshapiro
    Member

    so where are other cr peeps going?? just outta curiousity…im not going to florida for the first time in a long time even though surprisingly pesach is after tax season

    #752561
    Sender Av
    Member

    when it says for 8 days it does not mean with the singer, it means he will be there for one or maybe more of those days to sing

    #752562
    Poster
    Member

    Some of the ads look so amazing!! I would love to go. But for MANY reasons cannot. For those that could afford and do go, have fun!!

    #752563
    anon1m0us
    Participant

    commonsense: Find you own sponsor. i found one:)

    #752564

    I think that its a lack of chinuch. You havto show your kids the meaning of pesach. just locking up your house and putting your feet up at the seder withough putting you hands in cold water is not what pesach is supposed to be. Show your kids the real meaning. (ofcourse some people havto go for various valuable reasons whihc is understandable) but stam just to go cause pesach is just to hard is not a reason. Bad example for our kids.

    #752565
    adorable
    Participant

    frumsinglegirl- I could not have said it better myself. I have a friend who’s family goes to a hotel every year and sometimes I am so jealous of her but I just think that she will never know what the “real thing” is all about! And what happens when these girls get married and they cant afford to go to a hotel….they have no clue how to clean for pesach!

    #752566
    bpt
    Participant

    Lia makes several good points. I know a handful of hotel goers (both staffers and guests).

    Some are alone, and this is the only normal option.

    Some are working, so that’s obvious.

    Some are very rich, also self-explanatory.

    But no matter what the reason, understand this: no matter how good the hechsher, no matter how many promises the hosts make, you are compromising on the kashrus you could have had at home. Not pure chometz at the seder c’v, but chumras (like not using things that fall on the floor, only using things that are peeled) or bigger no-nos (kitchen staff not washing their hands /brushing their teeth after eating their pure chometz food, Uncle Milton bringing to the dining room “his own knaidlach, ’cause the one the hotel makes give him gas”, and then taking Uncle Milton’s plate back to the dishwasher and giving it to YOU the next meal)

    All those things, are part and parcel of the hotel experience. Sounds far-fetched? Ask someone who’s been there.

    #752567

    bpt: Well said!!!

    #752568
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    BPT,

    But those things are exclusive to Pesach hotels — they can just as easily apply to any restaurant during the year or even your friend’s or relative’s house.

    Are you saying that anyone who eats anything out of the home is potentially compromising on his/her kashrus to the point where they should just not do it?

    The Wolf

    #752569

    WolfishMusings

    cmon?! you know good and well that thats not what bpt is implying.

    Lets not be silly here…

    #752570
    hanib
    Participant

    well… many people don’t eat by others on pesach.

    #752571
    observanteen
    Member

    I think going to a hotel for Pesach is like Davening beyechidus on Yom Kippur (not talking halachawise). It’s JUST NOT THE SAME!! This is not something I can describe… It’s just the atmosphere. I can’t imagine my father sitting with his white kittel at some luxurious hotel lobby and leading our seder… It just doesn’t click! I think the “geshmak” of yomtov is the “heimishkeit” and the simplicity (our seder is royal but heimish). I wouldn’t go to a hotel for Pesach even if THEY’D pay me. (Oh, I’m SURE they’re DYING to have me there;))

    #752573
    deiyezooger
    Member

    Noting like sitting at your own table in your own home with your kids around, however for some people thats not an option, so instead of being a geust they choose to go to a hotal. each to his own.

    #752574
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    cmon?! you know good and well that thats not what bpt is implying.

    I know he’s not implying that… but only because I don’t think he thought it through as far as I did.

    The concerns he raises are NOT applicable only to Pesach hotels — they are applicable to almost any other kashrus situation. As such, why is he so concerned about Pesach hotels and not any other situation?

    The Wolf

    #752575
    cshapiro
    Member

    it seems like im the only one going away…anyone else??? just curious if ill bump into any cr goers over the vienesse table ;))

    #752576
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    it seems like im the only one going away…anyone else??? just curious if ill bump into any cr goers over the vienesse table ;))

    Sorry… while I (unlike many posters here) don’t have any hashkafic problem with going away for Pesach, it’s just not my style (or Eeees’s). We’ve always been the “stay at home” types.

    The Wolf

    #752577

    wolfish,

    Because on pesach we are extra careful with the food situation

    thats y

    #752578
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    Because on pesach we are extra careful with the food situation

    That may be true. But eating potential tarfus during the year is pretty bad too. Is the lav against eating tarfus not worth the extra precaution?

    The Wolf

    #752579
    deiyezooger
    Member

    Since chometz is assur even a ???? we are more machmir pesach.

    #752580
    observanteen
    Member

    Woooolff. C’mon! (Sorry, couldn’t hold back anymore)

    #752581
    willi
    Member

    I’ve worked in hotels often in the past. The first time it was like “wow”, but it gets less exciting each time. Obviously it’s different as a worker than as a guest, but I’m not jealous of the ones who go for “pleasure”. As a matter of fact, although I enjoyed some parts of the hotel experience, it didn’t really feel like Pesach to me over there…

    #752582

    WolfishMusings:

    Chumras about food on Pesach is mentioned in the Shulchan Oruch. Chumras that are only done on Pesach, but not all year round. So really, since you’ve thought it through, you have some legitimate questions on our Poskim.

    #752583
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    OK, OK. I still think I have a valid point, but it seems I’m clearly in the minority here, so I retract the objection.

    The Wolf

    #752584
    anon1m0us
    Participant

    I used to think like most of you that a seder in a hotel is a lack of chinuch or spirit of yom tov. But when I saw my family sitting around a seder table smiling, rested, and being served, it became the true meaning of a yom tov. After the seder we went to bed and did not need to worry about cleaning up or what to make the next night. That is what Yom Tov is about.

    As far as your Kashrus is concerned, there is a reason why we have mashgichum and rabbonim there. Their job is to verify that everything is good. If you feel it is not good enough, you should also kill your own chickens and cows, because you are relying on someone else and pesach you should be more machir. You should not buy ANY items from the grocery like potato starch, because you are also relying on other people doing their job.

    edited

    #752585
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    OK, OK. I still think I have a valid point, but it seems I’m clearly in the minority here, so I retract the objection.

    The Wolf

    You do have a valid point, that we should consider the compromises made in any restaurant or catered event. They also have a valid point that Pesach is more stringent.

    BTW, in general, I don’t think you should retract your opinion because of the number of opinions expressed in the CR, unless you’ve been convinced by a good argument.

    #752586
    always here
    Participant

    anon1m0us~ I am hearing you loud & clear on both your points.

    #1. My DH & I are tired! B’H, all the children are married; we love having them for Yom Tovim, but we’re now B’H in our ‘golden years’ & it’s harder!.. to clean (altho’ I can’t do much & have hired help), & I do all the cooking myself beforehand so that I don’t havta be exhausted from preparations; the children help make some things, like Pesach lukshen, salads, etc. My daughter’s in-laws are again this year going to a hotel in Florida, so they’re coming to us. My son’s in-laws are in Israel, so they’re coming in from Monsey to us. My other daughter has a family, but lives walking distance; they’ll come for a Seder, iy’H, & we’ll keep a grandson or two for longer. My son & his daughter will be here the first or last days, plus. BUT– I KNOW my children would definitely NOT begrudge my DH & I going away, & I’d go in a heartbeat if it was affordable. B’H, we’ve had many great years together & we’re very close, so it’s not like we wouldn’t have plenty of other times, iy’H, to be together.

    #2. My DH is a retired Mashgiach (not by choice, but because companies want to hire @ the lowest pay they can.) He always felt a great achrias for his work. We were able to go to a hotel for Succos years ago & altho’ we didn’t see him all that much because he was so dedicated to his work, it was a fantastic experience. And if you trust the heksher & Rav Hamachshir of the place you’ve chosen to go to, & if other mashgiachim are as machmir as my DH, you should not have to worry about the kashrus. Otherwise, don’t mish.

    #752587
    mytake
    Member

    Observanteen

    Well said. I wouldn’t give up Pesach at home for any hotel. And that includes the pre-pesach rush, the friendly bickering,the endless cleaning, shopping, cooking, hosting guests, and everything else that comes with Pesach at home sweet home….

    #752588
    veteran
    Member

    As far as your Kashrus is concerned, there is a reason why we have mashgichum and rabbonim there. Their job is to verify that everything is good. If you feel it is not good enough, you should also kill your own chickens and cows, because you are relying on someone else and pesach you should be more machir. You should not buy ANY items from the grocery like potato starch, because you are also relying on other people doing their job.

    Whatever helps you sleep at night, buddy 🙂

    #752589
    aries2756
    Participant

    For all those who said they would “NEVER” you have NOT gotten to that point yet. B”H you have NEVER experienced an illness or accident a few weeks before Pesach which renders the woman of the house incapable of pulling it off. And you have not gotten to that wonderful age where all your children are B”H married and with all the eineklech there is no home big enough to accommodate sharing Bubby and Zeidy for pesach, so you go to hotel where you can all be together for yom tov, including maybe a great grandparent and some aunts and uncles. Or maybe you have B”H not experienced the day when ALL your kids are in a difficult position where they are ALL going to their in-laws that year. Or you work so hard all year that it is impossible to make Pesach at home. Such as families where both parents work and happen to be accountants bogged down in tax season.

    It is lovely to be home and a wonderful experience but when I am home I rarely step foot out of the kitchen even with help. It is also wonderful to be at the hotel because I get to rest and am not in charge of cooking or cleaning, although the seder experience itself is different, yet one can go to many different shiurim that I wouldn’t go to at home because I go from kitchen to bed to shower to kitchen to bed to shower….. And of course I get to meet wonderful and amazing other yiddin that I wouldn’t normally have the opportunity to meet.

    And like I told Esther Malka. WE have already had this discussion last year and probably the year before. The pros and cons, the cons and pros, the “never” and the “its great”.

    #752590
    AJE
    Participant

    We are a perfect example of why you should not judge others who choose to go to a Pesach Hotel. This year will be our second year attending such a program. I have been undergoing treatment for a back injury for over a year now (herniated disc that is sitting on a nerve root) and have problems standing in the kitchen even long enough to make a regular Shabbos. We have a special needs son with multiple health problems (we are a Chai Lifeline family). Last year, 5 weeks before Pesach, we found out that he had a spinal tumor. B’H, he is doing okay, but still has regular therapy and doctor’s appointments. My husband and I are both BT and do not have any Frum family near us. We are not on any kind of tuition assistance and we can afford to take a vacation. My husband works 60+ hours per week, and we would like to have family time together. We are on the West Coast, so we go to a hotel in the LA area. Last year Chai Lifeline gave us tickets to take the kids to Disneyland during Chol Hamoed and it was a ray of sunshine during a very stressful time. Would anyone like to make any snarky and judgmental comments about our Pesach plans?

    #752591
    bpt
    Participant

    “As such, why is he so concerned about Pesach hotels and not any other situation? “

    There are a few differences:

    The other scenario I did not mention (but happens) is this:

    The hotel agrees, months in advance, to a certain number of mashgichim / guest ratio, which impacts the number of meals / hours they need to work. When the bookings are done and the guest arrive, the number of guests are FAR MORE than anticipated, (and the meal output / kitchen hours) are far more than the initial number of mashgichim can properly supervise.

    What to do? Turn guests away? Close the kitchen? Let the show go on?

    Like I said, its not a guarantee that these things will happen, but it is definitely a roll of the dice.

    #752592
    bpt
    Participant

    ” anyone else??? “

    I can’t afford it (as I’d only want to go to a $10,000 place).

    Besides, even I I could afford it, and you were at the same exact hotel, I would’nt see you. In fact, I would’nt see anybody.

    I’d be too busy looking in the mirror

    #752593
    always here
    Participant

    AJE~ I wouldn’t! refuah sheleima to you & your family. & have a gr8 Pesach again this year!

    I have a very close friend’s son, who has been blessed, B’H, with fantastic experiences thanks to Chai Lifeline; kol havod to them!!

    #752594
    bpt
    Participant

    “Would anyone like to make any snarky and judgmental comments about our Pesach plans?”

    No. Clearly, in your case, the need to go away is imperative, and syata d’shmaya will see to it that you / your family will have a chag kosher v’sameach, and a refua shelema!

    The snarky comments are aimed at the folks who, well you know who those folks are. And if you don’t, lucky you! (I do…Bklyn has loads of them)

    #752595
    TheGoq
    Participant

    I think it must be nice for the singles who go to hotels not to have to wait hand and foot on their married sibs.

    #752596
    mytake
    Member

    AJE

    I actually commented earlier about how I’d never give up Pesach at home for anything. We happen to be a (b”H former) Chai Lifeline family, and for two years we did NOT stay home for Pesach.

    I hated being away. (That, and watching someone I love so much fight nausea and pain all through the seder…)

    Of course I didn’t mean to judge. God knows I understand (much better than I’d like to) that sometimes staying home isn’t possible.

    I hope I didn’t offend you or anyone else. But if there IS a choice, staying home is best, hands down.

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