- This topic has 32 replies, 19 voices, and was last updated 13 years, 11 months ago by .
-
Posts
-
Do young married couples get house keepers for a day a week??
Where is a good place to look for someone reliable in E”Y??
If they pay for it they get it. Otherwise not.
Why would a young married couple need a housekeeper?
There are reliable one in EY. I even heard of man cleaners here. They charge 40 shekels an hour.
Whatever they feel is needed. No rules.
Why 2 question marks? Are you surprised by the prospect?
I think this should be decided by the couples, if they really need it, budgeting, research, etc. I would think that even with a hectic schedule they should be able to manage with only occasional cleaning help. But a full day a week? (??)
I’m with SJS (and to some extent, Tzippi)
Why would a young couple need cleaning help? Unless you’re at 4-5 kids (all under the age of 6) if you need help cleaning, you need a whole lot more than cleaning help.
You need help. Period
I have cleaning help once a week. Everyone has differnt things that make them feel good. Personally, a cleaning lady to come and make the place sparkle is a luxury for me like some pple love getting pedicures.
bp totty – If the op says they need help, why miish arayn? Whats it anyones gisheft why they need help?
People should do what is right for them to do, however young couples should first learn how to take care of themselves and each other before hiring outside help. They should not look at it as a tircha or as something unpleasant. They should be happy to do it for each other and for their own home. When the wife becomes pregnant and doesn’t feel well and it becomes an issue because she can’t do it and he does not have the time to take care of her and learn or work and take care of the home, then there is more of a need for help.
The problem with starting off as a young couple with cleaning help, is that you become dependant on it. Unless you both are working 12-15 hours a day, cleaning up from 2 people does not take too much effort. If you can’t cope without children, how will you cope with children?
Granted, if you can afford it, sure splurge. But keep in mind that often the days pre-children are the easiest to save money for the future. Once kids come, things get very expensive very quickly.
maybe they are too busy walking the dogs, going to college and spending time on facebook 😉
real-brisker, read the first sentence. It sounds like the OP is asking is this de riguer, like whatever the current laundry list of who pays what dictates. I’m just saying that one should get it if needed, didn’t sound like a given.
I know LOTS of young couples in israel with cleaning help. The floors here don’t get mopped like in America, they require ‘sponja’, which is more like man’s labor than ladies. For those that don’t want their husbands to have to do sponja (like is the case in many homes here and is very “normal” – dont tell the shvigger!!!) so they get some outside help, it’s not sooooo crazy! And once shes here doesn’t hurt for her to clean bathrooms too…
Y’know? You’re right. If the couple can afford it, they should get someone else to do the unpleasant part of running a household.
But why stop there? Hire a surrogate to have the kids, someone to raise the kids, someone to <enter the job you dislke most>, and just be done with the whole messy affair. (uh, poor choice of words, perhaps). Then, the kids can hire someone to care for the elderly parents when they lose their luster and interest in Mom and Dad.
Why? I’ll tell you why in one word: responsibility. You chose to start a family.. finish the work you started.
I’ve got enough $ to hire people to do much of the domestic stuff we do at home. But its our family, and there is nothing physicaly wrong with any of us, so we do the work ourselves.
Becuase its our responsibility. That’s why.
BP Totty…. you are really out of touch and sound a bit jealous of the fact this young couple can and want help. Sorry for the newsflash but scrubbing the floor and getting someone to wash the windows doesn;t make them a bad person or wife. And you are 100% dead wrong for comparing this to rasing children and taking care of the eldery. While we are at it, why not take away womens right to vote and forbid them from getting driving licences?? Or better yet let them not leave the house unless accompanied by a man, of course they will need to walk 5 feet behind them….
“out of touch and sound a bit jealous”
Huh? OK, lets take this apart slowly. Not because I’m trying to win you over; becuase just in case Memo is reading each post, I don’t want it to sound like I’m critizing her in particular. Its a general mind set that I have a problem with.
1) Out of touch – if expecting someone to work is called old fashioned, then you’ve got me pegged. A huge contributing factor to many of today’s society ills, is the fact that when the going gets tough, find someone else to do the job more to your liking. Barring a physical handicap, there is no reason a young couple cannot handle basic housekeeping, laundry, cooking, ect. And if she works full time? Wonderful! He does not. Let him pitch in bein hasdorim, the way he expects her to work and bear children. Marraige is about building a relationship. Helping one another is what solid relationships are built on. Why deprive yourself of this, especially in the early years of your marraige?
2) Jealous – no, I pity them. Kind of the way I pity folks that haul off to a hotel for Pesach, even if it almost a tie for what it costs to make Pesach at home. What you gain in convenience, you lose in terms of Grandparents, community, ect.
If you’re talking about a clean-up crew to help after new apt. renovations, or work that requires skill / experience (like painting or floor scraping) that’s another thing. But regular domestic help for 2 people? Ridiculous.
And for the record, if I’m jealous about anything, its the young chosson’s ability to pack in 12-18 months of undisturbed learning. Not his $50 cleaning lady
BPT- i read and reread your last post and I think every single word you said is true. You are 100% right that for 2 people, and even if there is a baby involved, there is no need for outside cleaning help. I know someone who has 9 children and only has 3 hours of help a week! can you imagine?!? And yes her kids are health, happy, stable children. She is their mother and she is capable of making supper, doing laundry and even (gulp) cleaning a bathroom! I think the girls grow up with more of a sense of responsibility and the boys realize that the wife is not a machine- their father pitches in and they will also have to help….
Thank you BPT again! Great post!
I have heard of newlyweds having help. What do I think? If you can afford it, go for it. I also think they are spoiled.
Honestly, I look forward to all that “menial labor” that I will iy”h be able to do for my husband. Nothing says “I Love You” more than a home cooked meal, a freshly laundered and pressed shirt, clean sheets, and a sparkling house that you did BY YOURSELF FOR HIM!
(“Hire a surrogate to have the kids” LOL! Classic.)
I realize that Memo’s question was an innocent one, however I must say that I hear where BP Totty is coming from. The younger generation of today have set very high standards for themselves and then when the expenses of real life kick in (once the expected parental support has stopped)the “luxury” has now become a necessity. Whether you can afford it or not, the peer pressure alone makes everyone need to be like everyone else.
“Who doesn’t have a cleaning lady @least 3 times a week?”
“Who does their own laundry anymore?”
“Who drives a late model car anymore? “Everyone leases a new one every 3 years”.
“Who doesn’t go to Miami @least once a year?”
“Most people now hire someone to learn with their sons every night instead of doing it themselves”
Need I go on?
In the old days, there were the few rich families and there were the rest of us. We as kids pitched in to clean the house, we had older cars, didn’t always get to go on vacation, etc, etc…
and no one was embarrassed about it either. Now if you don’t have all these things which are supposedly the norm, you have to feel like your second class.
LOL! Classic.)
I had funnier ones, but I doubt the Mods would have let them thru.
V’hamavin yovin!
The floors here don’t get mopped like in America, they require ‘sponja’, which is more like man’s labor than ladies.
The only cleaning which is man’s labor is scraping the BBQ.
“There are reliable one in EY. I even heard of man cleaners here. They charge 40 shekels an hour”
how many hour’s does it take to clean the average size man?
OP:
memo
Member
Do young married couples get house keepers for a day a week??
Where is a good place to look for someone reliable in E”Y??
~~~~~~~~
memo
Member
ya. there’s nothing wrong with it!
Am I missing something here?
TheGoq LOL!!!!! 🙂
I have 8 kids and no cleaning help and we survive somehow. And I even do the sponja myself, as do most of my friends. Sure, it’s most physical then using a mop to smear the dirt around, but most women are perfectly capable of doing sponja.
As far as where to find good cleaning help in EY, how about asking neighbors for recommendations? Nobody here can give you much information without knowing where in EY you live, but your neighbors should be able to help out.
Having children in E”Y who occassionally take help, yes it is an issue. My daughter in law(s) usually get someone by word of mouth. Yes, one has to be careful as one had towels and even meat disappearing. No, the woman came for not more than 2 hours but i guess was a professional “ganuf”. Surprisingly too, there are many frum girls who go in and help(for pay) with such as ironing, washing the loads of pots and pans one may have from pre Shabbos preparations. No, my kids are not spoiled. In fact,they have so well blended into life in Eretz Yisroel that many don’t believe they are not first timers(not children of people who move to E”Y years ago). Of course ours sons help too!!
To JustMyOpinion, i learned not to judge by the cover. One never knows what is really going on in someone else’s life and it’s not our business. Someone asks a question and you can either help him/her or not! The why is not for us to ask or comment about.
Going away or having cleaning help is sometimes a form of refuah for someone who needs a Refuah Shelaima and wants to keep it quiet.
For the person in E”Y who needs the cleaning help, what neighborhood do you live in? Perhaps i could get you some leads?
BP Totty
I just want to say that your posts always are right on the mark. thanks you!
To Lia who wrote:
To JustMyOpinion, i learned not to judge by the cover. One never knows what is really going on in someone else’s life and it’s not our business.
If you noticed, my opening statement was:
“I realize that Memo’s question was an innocent one”.
I was responding to all the arguments regarding whether it was needed or not or how people’s “needs” have grown.
The original question here was:
“Do young married couples get housekeepers for a day a week??”
not, “I need a housekeeper”. That is none of our business to judge.
That being said and with the economy being what it is, I have to assume that MOST young married couples in Israel are being supported by their parents. When the parents are shelling out money that they probably don’t have, I don’t think a housekeeper should be at the top of the priority list of 2 young “strong” people to clean an apartment that is not huge at all.
Especially when they all think that everyone HAS TO HAVE a Bugaboo for $1000
…and btw, they shlep everything else from America, why not bring a regular mop. You don’t have to do sponja.
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.