How much do YOU give?

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  • #593152

    rb
    Member

    I was just wondering how much people give their son’s Rebbeim for Chanukah? Do you also give for Purim?

    I have found that people tip their children’s camp JC $10 for a summer and feel comfortable giving the same amount to their son’s Rebbe who teaches him Torah the whole year!

    #712081

    artchill
    Participant

    How much do YOU get from your co-workers and boss around the holiday season?

    You are paid by your company for doing the work you are hired to do. Perks and tips, etc. are nice but are NOT required. Same with teachers. The schools charge parents according to their ability for tuition. The school uses this money to fund the teacher SALARIES. Parental tips are nice but can’t be EXPECTED or DEMANDED by any rational teacher.

    JC’s and waiters PRIMARY payment and income is NOT through their employer, rather it’s through tips. That’s why parents pay the tips.

    #712082

    deiyezooger
    Member

    Tips can’t be demanded but thats the norm and when the school hires a rebbe its mentioned when discussing the sallery so its somewhat expected. Still I believe its not how much you give but how you give e.i. a nice note e.t.c.

    #712084

    artchill
    Participant

    Rebbeim and teachers who went the extra mile for my kids were rewarded in kind. Tips and bonuses are meant to encourage outstanding effort from staff NOT to accept mediocrity. If any rebbe/teacher is insulted by this, let them speak to a regular employee at stam a company. Kids ‘es kumpt mir’ attitudes aren’t always taught at home.

    #712085

    bpt
    Participant

    $50, but that covers Purim too. And only up till 8th grade. HS and beyond, my kids are self sufficent, so there really is no “extra mile”

    #712086

    apushatayid
    Participant

    “when the school hires a rebbe its mentioned when discussing the sallery so its somewhat expected”

    They do? Expected by whom?

    #712087

    aries2756
    Participant

    Usually the class mother collects money for the teachers and Rebbeim both at Chanuka and Purim. This is for a class/group gift. This eases the burden for those who can’t afford and the teacher/Rebbe gets a lump sum from everyone. Not everyone gives what is asked and some give more. Some give besides the group effort. Everyone tends to do what is comfortable for their own situation and what is nogeah between their child and his mechanchim. If one has a child who needs extra attention and that is noticed and responded to, then a parent might respond in a more generous manner to show appreciation at appropriate times. If a parent feels that no attention was paid to their child or a mechanech wasn’t especially caring toward their child their dissatisfaction might come out at this time as well. And if people are financially well off they may generously show their appreciation at times like Chanuka, Purim and Pesach knowing that the mechanchim are also on a strict budget necessitated by their salaries yet have the same expenses like everyone else.

    So basically I would say to each their own.

    #712088

    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    You sound as if you are tipping because it is “required”, “expected”, or “part of the salary”.

    Do you give your kids presents because they expect it?

    Why don’t you give the Rebbi something because you appreciate him and recognize that he is being under-compensated for what he does? Doesn’t your son’s Rebbi deserve something in appreciation?

    #712089

    WIY
    Member

    rb and any other parents who have kids in school

    If you want to do something really nice and thoughtful, buy a card… and write a nice personal message to the Rebbi thanking him for all that he has done and will continue to do for your child and his classmates. I cant tell you precisely what to write but it should be from the heart and sincere. I guarantee you that if you do this it will be appreciated and will pay off nice dividends in the attention the Rebbi/Morah/teacher will give to your child’s development and progress.

    #712090

    rb
    Member

    BP Totty- “HS and beyond, my kids are self sufficent, so there really is no “extra mile”

    My husband is a Beis Medrash Rebbe and I can tell you that parents who still give Chanukah gifts are few and far between. When they do happen, they are very much appreciated. He puts hours into his boys- hours that are not included in his salary. When we receive a check our response is “While not neccesary, it is very much appreciated”. And you know what, it is appreciated. Someone is recognizing your efforts. And it is not always from the students that he puts the most into.

    WIY- I don’t think that he ever received a card without some gift. It just doesn’t happen that way.

    #712091

    eclipse
    Member

    a principal of a huge school once told me that sincere notes of appreciation mean the world to a rebbe or teacher…and evoke in them a desire to be kind to your child,too.

    on a side note,after 2 checks FOR FIVE DOLLARS(j.c.tips) bounced(!!), I was so embarrassed, I decided…if I have so many tips to give I can’t even keep track…i’d rather give one normal size tip to the rebbe(who has to prepare even in the summer).

    #712092

    WIY
    Member

    eclipse

    You tip $5 and with a bounced check?! Have you been out of your house recently? What the heck can you buy with $5?!

    #712093

    eclipse
    Member

    each kid had about 45 j.c.’s..vos vilst du fun mein leben?

    #712094

    chesedname
    Participant

    a rebbi once told me, it means more to get a small amount a few times a year, then once a big check.

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