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I am a recently working Yeshiva boy and would really like to get married, but thinking of the cost of supporting a wife, paying a mortgage (or even rent), food, clothing, I simply cannot afford it
If you marry someone with a decent income, it should be doable.
yid_pashut:
With the shidduch crisis on, sell yourself to the highest bidder. Learn in Lakewood so that your shver has an excuse to support you.
Wait until the kids come then you really can’t afford it. Tuition is a natural birth control:)
Then don’t get married until you can afford it
or
Plan to move somewhere (if you can get a job) where you can afford to live
The gemarah states; “tinuk v’kar imoi” meaning with every additional child comes an additional source of income.
The gemarah states; “tinuk v’kar imoi” meaning with every additional child comes an additional source of income.
Which B’Davka doesn’t include tuition, according to my rov. the Chiyuv of Limud to your child is not included in “tinuk v’kar imoi” (or whatever the lashon is). Food would be included, though.
yid_pashut, I can see that you are a responsible person. Some people don’t even think about the possibility of not being able to afford being married, and they realize it when it’s too late. I was, and actually still am, in a similar situation, and the best advice I can give is think carefully before any big decision you make. Plan ahead. Realize the effects of your decisions. Make connections with as many people as you can. You never know who might be able to help you out at any given moment.
There are different ways to deal with your situation: Some people don’t get married until they are absolutely sure they can live with it financially. Others marry and then together try to find ways to be financially secure. Do what you are most comfortable with.
” “The gemarah states; “tinuk v’kar imoi” meaning with every additional child comes an additional source of income.”
Which B’Davka doesn’t include tuition, according to my rov. the Chiyuv of Limud to your child is not included in “tinuk v’kar imoi” (or whatever the lashon is). Food would be included, though.”
Well for that we have another Chaza”l “Kol mezoinoisov shel adam k’tzivin loi m’rosh hashanah chitz m’hotzaois banov letalmud torah”
A report that I heard yesterday on the radio that the cost of raising a child until he is 18 years old is $250,000.00. And if we can assume that chareidi children cost more (schools, kosher food, shabbos clothing, sleepaway camp) it gotta be somewhere in the 400K to half a million. I have 4 kids and to think that will cost 2 million within the next 15 years is truly scary.
Zaidy: thank your luck stars you are not the Ribbono Shel Olam. We just completed davening on Rosh Hashono regarding income. Emuna and bitachon help us exist in this world. remember, as a father, tzoel vi’a tatale and as a zaida in transposes itself to tzoel vi’a zaidala. somehow the master plan of the master architect of this world has it all figured out…..
This topic is interesting to me cuz i used to tell my husband that i was afraid of having too many children that we couldnt afford. Myhusband always said, Hashem knows what he is doing and to whom He is giving what, and what He gives is what we can afford or we will make ourselves afford.
And you know what? He was right! time and again Hashem proves to me that He is watching out for us and there for us!
Whether its in the form of a bonus from my boss or his, a refund from somewhere, a gift from a relative…it just comes!
i always heard a little disffrent with each child brocha comes into the family so its not always money per say but we r bring up hashems children he supplies for us all we can plan and save and wait..and it can all be gone in a sec or we can rely on hashem and of course do our hestaldlus and have plenty
golden mom: i totally agree. I just brought out htis one aspect cuz finances is what the OP was talking about.
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