How should I handle this?
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- This topic has 37 replies, 12 voices, and was last updated 11 years, 8 months ago by real-brisker.
July 4, 2011 4:32 am at 4:32 am #597773
someting has been bothering me lately and i don’t know what i should do about it or if i should do anything at all. hopefully maybe someone could help me with this….
i have been going swimming in a local public pool for women for a few eeks now. my problem is that while they have lifegaurds, i notice that one in particular spends the ENTIRE time chatting with people. either that or texting. the pool is crowded and i feel like she should be watching and actually being a lifeguard and not shmoozing with everyone!!! if it was a 2 minute conversation i wouldnt find it so upsetting but its the whole time (or at least for the hour im there)
do i say someting to the director? i am not a complainer and i dont in ANY WAY want to get this woman in trouble but i also feel like its a Sakana! but then i think “am i over-reacting?!?” after all, its all adults in the pool, and maybe shes good at multi tasking and could do both… but it also bothers me!!
any suggestions on what i should do? i dont wanna hurt this person or cause a big issue about it…. should i just let it go?July 4, 2011 11:41 am at 11:41 am #783527
Definetly say something to the director in a nice way, forget about the fat that the person is not doing their job. It’s sakanas nifushos.July 4, 2011 11:50 am at 11:50 am #783528Pac-ManMember
Tell the lifeguard. If she doesn’t stop immediately, absolutely tell the director.July 4, 2011 12:30 pm at 12:30 pm #783529get a lifeMember
I think you should approach the lifegaurd herself and if that does not work then speak to the manager. It is not over reacting! I myself saw an adult drown. And beleive me it is not nice! It is a real SAKANA!!!July 4, 2011 2:29 pm at 2:29 pm #783530ursula momishMember
Is she the only lifeguard on duty at any time? If she is, then this may be drastic, but maybe plan with a friend who swims with you–so there will be no actual danger to either of you–to pretend to get a cramp in the pool, and see how fast the lifeguard reacts.July 4, 2011 3:26 pm at 3:26 pm #783531aries2756Participant
Ask the director what the rules are for the lifeguards in regards to cell phones? Then don’t say which one it is just say that one of the lifeguards is constantly on the phone and it can result in a serious situation because it probably is distracting her from the job. Let them come into the pool discretely and watch for themselves or speak to all of them.July 4, 2011 4:01 pm at 4:01 pm #783532mewhoParticipant
as i said in a different post, there is too much texting going on. certain jobs should not allow it at all.
a supermarrket in my area does not allow the cashiers to text or they get fired. i’m guessing that came after they gave someone back the wrong amount of changeJuly 4, 2011 6:08 pm at 6:08 pm #783533
cofeefan – First of all -are these guards getting paid? (Just curious -Sometimes people who volunteer don’t take things as serious as paid workers.)
You definitely should first go over to the lifeguard and mention that she shouldn’t be on the phone at all unless it pertains to the job. Also mention that if she continues her behavior, you’ll have no choice but to report her. Then report her if she doesn’t stop.
Reporting her first probably is LH and might cause her to lose her job!
Don’t let her get away with it. But approach her first.
This is what I would want s/o to do for me, if they have any complaints on my performance. I wear ten hats and right now I’m wearing my lifeguard hat!July 4, 2011 6:13 pm at 6:13 pm #783534
RB – “Definetly say something to the director in a nice way, forget about the fat that the person is not doing their job. It’s sakanas nifushos.”
It might be a Sakanah, but your way is LH, if you don’t approach the LG first!July 4, 2011 6:33 pm at 6:33 pm #783535
Health – I would not want a lifeguard working or watching me that doesn’t have enought daas to know to pay attention to the pool.July 4, 2011 8:07 pm at 8:07 pm #783536basket of radishesParticipant
I would personally do a large cannon ball into the swimming pool right in front of him and soak him. That would work right? He would know never to mess with your concentration and eyesight.July 4, 2011 9:48 pm at 9:48 pm #783537
first- yes there is only one lifeguard on duty in 3 hour shifts. and i would assume shes getting paid. shes also not talking on the phone, she talks to people IN the pool face to face, as of yet i have not heard her talking on the phone, only texting and glancing up every few seconds (BH for that…)
my problem with talking to her first is that she is a marrried woman while i am a single girl. i just feel dumb! what would i say? i am so not the type to say something straight out! should i just try to avoid her shift and hope everything turns out ok for everyone else?! or do i tell the director without telling her which LG it is? like maybe she could make a meeting and “review the rules”?July 5, 2011 3:38 am at 3:38 am #783538
real-brisker – “Health – I would not want a lifeguard working or watching me that doesn’t have enought daas to know to pay attention to the pool.”
You’re extremely tough on others -I hope you’re just as strict with yourself. So if you ever pass a stop sign without coming to a full stop, or pass a red light, or exceed the speed limit, I hope you would immediately hand in your driver’s license. You shouldn’t have a second chance -you knew better. Most people who drive don’t want others on the road who don’t follow the basic rules.
Me, on the other hand, understand human nature and realize we all make mistakes. This is why you first get a ticket and then after a few times, your license gets suspended!July 5, 2011 3:47 am at 3:47 am #783539
CF – ” i just feel dumb! what would i say?”
Ask her simply -I see you’re texting alot -How is it possible to text and watch the pool at the same time?
“hope everything turns out ok for everyone else?!”
Sorry, she needs to be informed before a tragedy occurs.
“or do i tell the director without telling her which LG it is? like maybe she could make a meeting and “review the rules”?”
This is snitching/LH. The Director will figure it out in a half of second who it is! Use this method only as a last resort!July 5, 2011 1:35 pm at 1:35 pm #783540
Heath – My impression from the OP is that it wasn’t a one time thing, rather it is an ongoing occurance. And yes if it is an ongoing occurance I will stick with my previous post.July 5, 2011 2:46 pm at 2:46 pm #783541
Thak you health for the good advice!!July 5, 2011 4:46 pm at 4:46 pm #783542
real-brisker – “And yes if it is an ongoing occurance I will stick with my previous post.”
If s/o does something all the time -that means they know better? Dan the lady L’caf Zecus -maybe she isn’t aware of how serious her actions are! There are people who speed all the time -does this mean they are all aware of the dangers? When they finally get a ticket -then some will start thinking -maybe I did something wrong. Unless you’re perfect -Kshot Atzmecha V’achar Kach Ksot Achairim! Your Heter for LH and possibly causing s/o to lose their job is very flimsy!July 5, 2011 4:47 pm at 4:47 pm #783543
cofeefan -You’re welcome!July 5, 2011 4:53 pm at 4:53 pm #783544
Health – Yes someone that speeds all the time knows they are doing something wrong. I hope that a lifeguard knows what the job calls for, and if they don’t know what the job calls for than NO they are not a qualified lifeguard.July 5, 2011 5:18 pm at 5:18 pm #783545
“Yes someone that speeds all the time knows they are doing something wrong.”
They might know they are speeding, but they rationalize that it’s Ok. After enough tickets -they stop rationalizing.
“NO they are not a qualified lifeguard.”
The LG right now isn’t qualified, but maybe by informing him/her of their inappropiate behavior(s)- they will change. Why cause s/o to lose their job by speaking LH on them when you could accomplish the same thing by talking to them directly?!?!July 5, 2011 6:40 pm at 6:40 pm #783546
Health – As I stated I do not want a lifeguard that does not have their own daas to know what is proper, very nice you will tell them this, but if they weren’t smart enough for this who knows what else they will not be smart enough to know about by them self?July 5, 2011 7:47 pm at 7:47 pm #783547
real-brisker -“who knows what else they will not be smart enough to know about by them self?”
It’s possible. Are you familiar with the concept of “Dan Odom L’caf Zecus”? This applies to e/o, not just perfect people who don’t “ever” make mistakes!July 5, 2011 9:19 pm at 9:19 pm #783548
Health – If it was dan lkaf zechus or saftey which do you pick?July 6, 2011 4:11 am at 4:11 am #783549
real-brisker – E/o has a Chezkas Kashrus, even people who are texting all the time. When I’m in the medical field and I see s/o who is blatantly incompetent -then and only then do they lose their Chezkas Kashrus!July 6, 2011 4:34 am at 4:34 am #783550
yoish i dint mean to start an issue here….
so far i have not been by this LG’s shift so so far Hashem has made my decision for me 😉July 6, 2011 2:07 pm at 2:07 pm #783551aries2756Participant
Coffeefan, now that you brought it up, I believe you have an achrius to say something to her. Let her know how much you appreciate her and all the lifeguards first. It is always better to start off saying something nice. So say that and then mention that you don’t feel as comfortable as you should since each time you glance over at her she has her phone in her hand and is texting. Couldn’t she possibly put the phone away while she is on her shift before something tragic happens or someone complains to her boss? Maybe you can say you “think” you heard women talking about it.July 6, 2011 3:20 pm at 3:20 pm #783552
Health – Why does someone that is texting and shmoozing and not paying attention to the pool (the way the OP made it sound) still have a chezkas kashrus?July 6, 2011 5:20 pm at 5:20 pm #783553
RB – They have a Chezkas Kashrus on their lifesaving skills, not on their attention skills.
Why are you only interested in taking care of this problem with the good possibilty that the LG will be fired -maybe you can take care of this problem without damage to another Jew?July 6, 2011 6:46 pm at 6:46 pm #783554
Health – Part of lifeguarding skills is “common sense”. If someone doesn’t have it (by loosing their chezkas kashrus), then they are not qualified to be a lifeguard.July 7, 2011 1:57 am at 1:57 am #783555flowersParticipant
Ever person is capable of learning from their mistakes. I agree with Health. Speak to the Life guard first. If it doesn’t help, only then should you speak to the Director.July 7, 2011 2:08 am at 2:08 am #783556s2021Member
Snitching is snitching and I hate when ppl run to do it without making an effort to help the person first. (Is it even Loshon Horah? It could possibly be avoided..) Sure its more comfortable 4 u to speak with the director, but if u were in her position u would WISH someone spoke 2 u first. If ur really concerned u gotta speak 2 spazy first.July 7, 2011 3:57 am at 3:57 am #783557
good points everyone! im so glad i asked!! thanks for the advice!!!
so far ive been missing her shifts so i cant say anything but if the need arises again i will speak with her before going to the director but hopefully i wont have to;)July 7, 2011 4:14 pm at 4:14 pm #783559
RB -“Health – Part of lifeguarding skills is “common sense”. If someone doesn’t have it (by loosing their chezkas kashrus), then they are not qualified to be a lifeguard.”
1. A lot of people don’t have common sense, but most of them are still employed, married, etc.
2. Who are you to determine who is qualified to be a lifeguard?
How many years lifeguarding experience do you have?July 7, 2011 4:16 pm at 4:16 pm #783560
Right on!July 7, 2011 4:41 pm at 4:41 pm #783561nygalMember
i really think you shld tell the director bec if someone does drown chas veshalom then you wold feel it on ur concience that you didnt say anythingJuly 7, 2011 4:44 pm at 4:44 pm #783562
Health – I am my own personal opinion, as in who I would hire, and who I would want to watch me.July 7, 2011 5:14 pm at 5:14 pm #783563
RB – Yes, this was what we were discussing -are the opinions that say to try to get her fired before speaking to her at all, correct?July 8, 2011 1:50 am at 1:50 am #783564
Health – That’s my feelings, you may differ. Are any of us right – I don’t know, coffefan must ask a rav.
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