June 11, 2013 11:13 pm at 11:13 pm #609615
I recently listened to an excellent shiur from Rabbi Rabbi Aharon Weinberg on this topic. It is titles “Rabbi Aharon Weinberg: How to Keep Our Children on the Derech” and can be found on Torahanytime.comJune 11, 2013 11:31 pm at 11:31 pm #958697
Please forgive the typos. Gotta lay off the booze.June 12, 2013 12:16 am at 12:16 am #958698littlefishyMember
Oh… I see what you did there with the booze and the off the derech >:) …that was a joke right?June 12, 2013 12:40 am at 12:40 am #958699
The joke had nothing to do with OTD.
This video shiur is truly excellent and I think every parent should give a listen.June 12, 2013 12:35 pm at 12:35 pm #958700🍫Syag LchochmaParticipant
Thanks, WIY, I hope to do that tonight. You seem so ‘well informed’June 12, 2013 2:02 pm at 2:02 pm #958701simcha613Participant
Just wanted to point out, that it’s not within our control whether our children stay on the derech or not. Obviously we have to put in our hishtadlus with proper parenting and tefilah, but if Yitzchok Avinu couldn’t keep his son on the derech, that means that a lot of it is beyond our control.June 12, 2013 2:58 pm at 2:58 pm #958702YusselParticipant
Good Point. We seem to be living in a culture that promotes an “I can control everything” mind-set. There’s a shiur or a sefer or pamphlet for every topic showing how we can fix virtually every problem there is. The truth is we have little control over what others do, including our children. The canard that kids go off the derech because we don’t sing zemiros as the shabbos table is just that, a canard. People have the free will to do whatever they want and the most we can do is to try to control OUR OWN behavior.June 12, 2013 3:28 pm at 3:28 pm #958703BetShemeshInExileParticipant
Raise Happy Jews!!!June 12, 2013 8:38 pm at 8:38 pm #958705
Simcha613 and Yussel
You cant make anyone do anything but if you do chinuch properly you make it much harder for a kid to go off. Yes some kids will go off even from the best homes, however the fact that there are so many kids practically flying off the derech is a testament that theres really something seriously problematic with how we are bringing up our kids today.June 12, 2013 8:48 pm at 8:48 pm #958706jewish sourceParticipant
Children are a reflection of you mostly they become youJune 12, 2013 8:50 pm at 8:50 pm #958707writersoulParticipant
WIY: I feel like it’s not so much “harder for a kid to go off” so much as “easier for a kid to stay on.” Of course you’ll end up with those kids who are raring at the bit to get out, but you’re more likely to see teens falling through the cracks. It’s a subtle distinction but I think an important one.June 12, 2013 9:25 pm at 9:25 pm #958708
Ok. My point was simply that with the proper chinuch most kids will not want to go off. It wont be that appealing they wont look for it.June 12, 2013 10:59 pm at 10:59 pm #958709morahmomParticipant
WIY – You’re right about chinuch going a long way. But don’t underestimate the power of bad teachers… A difficult school situation really takes its toll.June 13, 2013 1:14 am at 1:14 am #958710
True. I agree.June 13, 2013 11:46 am at 11:46 am #958711zahavasdadParticipant
There is no way to really keep people on and there isnt one reason why people leave.
I would like to suggest a key clue is the word FREI. The choice of words is powerful.June 13, 2013 6:22 pm at 6:22 pm #958712
“There is no way to really keep people on and there isnt one reason why people leave.
I would like to suggest a key clue is the word FREI. The choice of words is powerful.”
If someone has made up his mind that he or she wants to go off I agree at that point it is definitely very difficult to change their mind. However before a person gets that far theres many steps and many things have to happen and go wrong, as well as many warning signs ignored.
Its a huge mistake to think that an irreligious person is free. The frei are the least free, he is actually a prisoner and one who keeps the Torah is the most free.
“V’haluchos ma’aseh Elokim heima v’hamichtav michtav Elokim hu chorus al haluchos – The Tablets were God’s handiwork, and the script was the script of God, engraved on the Tablets (Shemos 32:16).
“Al tikrei chorus ela chairus she-ein lecha ben chorin ela mi she-oseik b’talmud Torah, she-kol mi she-oseik b’Torah harei zeh misaleh – do not read chorus (engraved), rather chairus (free), only one who studies Torah is free because anyone who studies Torah becomes elevated (Avos 6:2).
One who is hostage to his own anger, or can not curb his desire for physical pleasure or is forever driven to seek honor and riches may be politically free, but leads a brutal, slavish existence.June 13, 2013 6:58 pm at 6:58 pm #958713zahavasdadParticipant
I think you missed the Point, that , that word was chosen means something. Obviously some think being frum is the opposite of “Frei”June 13, 2013 7:26 pm at 7:26 pm #958714
Did anyone actually watch the video or listen to the mp3 shiur?June 13, 2013 7:29 pm at 7:29 pm #958715ToiParticipant
dont move to beit shemesh. ha!!!!!!
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