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CR,
I am soon going into an intesne conversation with my parents. As many of you know, I have become quite different from them, but BH this problem seemed to ease off. But it seems as though it is only superficially. They r very pushy for me to lead my life in a certain direction because “I have no life experince”. They dont have so muc faith that this is who I am, but I’ve never been ahppier and I dont want to change. Im trying to make them happy, but these majour life deisicons that I think will make me a happier Jew and a happier person, well I think |I need to do them for myself. And I am the youngest child, so this is also probably a youngest child thing they r doing to me. I know they love me and want whats best, but it has come to a point, where I can no longer be open with them about anything importnt in my life because I am afraid they will get upset, cuz they always do. Im not looking for advice really here, I sorta wanted to share this story, because I need all the tefillos I can get that I will say the proper things to my parents. I want to repair this “flaw” in relationship with them, but I want them to see I need space to make choices on my own, so I can use their life experiance to help make MY OWN LIFE EXPERIANCES.
So pls pls, If you are kind enough, pls keep me in ur tefilos. Hashem will IyH know who you are tlaking about. Thanks CR family 🙂
hatzlocha rabba and good for you for jumping into that tought conversation!
?????? You guyz are all in my tefillos…
Srsly, why can there be a list on yhe board stating:
People who are not sick, but need your tefillos:
______bas ____
______ben ______
________ben _____
And so on…..
Wow, that could’ve been written by me. My parents told me they don’t really approve of my choices and that I don’t have enough life experience to choose correctly. I don’t know how to tell them that this is my life and I will do what I want and nothing they say will change it. And if they big me about it, it’ll just be worse and probably alienate me even more.
I will actually agree with you, People need to find things out for themselves.While I dont know specifics, I have found out that I knew some things and my parents knew somethings and sometimes they were right and sometimes they were wrong. Everyones life is different and everyone needs a different path.
Hatzlacha Rabba! Keep it mature and respectful. If you get too emotional, it may help to write a letter instead.
Thanks 🙂 Yes I have wished that many times too..
Best of luck to you!
OURtorah-
(((((())))))) sending hugs to you where ever you are. I will bli neder have you in mind during my shemona esrei tommorow. Stay strong, Hashem is at your side! Have you ever read the poem about footprints in the sand? I don’t have the poem with me right now, but basically the story goes like this-
There was once a person who died and went up to shamayim. There he saw his whole life flash before him by the sea. Whenever times were good, he saw two sets of footprints in the sand. However, when times were rough, he only saw one set. At the end of the viewing, he turned to Hashem and asked, “Hashem, during my good times you were always with me, but when I needed you most, why did you leave me alone?” Hashem replied, “my beloved child, who I love more than anything, it was during those times that I was carrying you.
I hope things go well!!!!!!
ourtorah, fkelly- can we make that a wish for 3-way email chizuk? :-/
I’m sorry things didn’t work out the way you’d hoped.
Stay strong!
thx for the update n encouragment! Wishing u continued progress n improvement!
Sorry it didnt work out, but at least youre on speaking terms and they are trying to understand you!!!!
Im sure this is for the best!
You are in my tefilos.
I’m sorry 🙁
What else would we be??
You have a great attitude, so keep it up! You’re doing great!
Whew…finally got a chance to sit and write a coherent post, something I’ve wanted to do for some time. I’m so sorry to hear things didn’t go as expected 🙁 I was (still am actually) davening for you!! I know you specifically requested that you don’t want advice but just wanted to share one thing. Personally, I don’t have the best relationship with either of my parents as our views are quite different as well. One thing I’ve learnt from this is, and I’m sure you know as well, parents love their children too much to just let them do whatever they think is right. Your parents (views, mentalities, and lifestyle aside) know you best! They seriously do, better than anyone else, so their opinions on how you should live shouldn’t be taken that lightly. Really listen to what they have to say, as they sincerely want you to be happy more than anyone else in the world. I really don’t know your situation so I’m kind of debating whether to post this or not, but if it’s not applicable to you maybe someone else will read it one day so please forgive me… 🙂 And btw I love your last post – you know you’re an inspiration, right?
My parents didnt particularly approve of my life choices either. At the end of the day I am considerably more successful financially and otherwise than they are. Parents may mean well but that does make them always right.
My tefilos are with you. Try saying one kapitol of tehillim a day for yourself too – it may sound silly or basic but if it is said with the proper kavana it will work wonders.
Keep talking to a mentor as that will help you have more faith in yourself, your abilities and your direction in life.
At the end of the day your parents will probably come around if they see you are serious about things that are important to you and are striving to do what you think is right.
Sheesh! That sounds complicated – so I was right for debating whether to post or not cuz I really didn’t understand your situation, I apologize for that. In any event, I’m glad you have your head on straight and I hope your parents come around to fully understanding you and accepting your life’s decisions as well. And congrats on your new subtitle – I’m loving it 🙂
OurTorah – thank you for a beautiful update.
What oomis said.
What letakin girl said
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