Imaginary Friends, Teddy Bears, Dolls

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  • #609393
    Vogue
    Member

    I know I am 19 years old, but I have noticed that my friends, who are generally normal good, bais yaakov girls, emotionally healthy each either have an imaginary friend, a teddy bear that they sleep with, or a doll. I love my friends, but I am starting to wonder if I should just join the trend, or if I am bucking it by not having one of the above?

    #1097861
    WIY
    Member

    Thanks for the laugh. You don’t need a teddy bear you have tens of imaginary friends in the coffeeroom.

    #1097862
    Vogue
    Member

    hahahahaha

    #1097863
    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    Vogue, its not a trend..its that these days a lot of terns in high school are insecure, depressed, or something else, sometimes it helps them to have such things for their self -estteem or just something to fry into at night and hug

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    #1097864
    Vogue
    Member

    i am not in high school anymore. I am referring to post seminary girls.

    #1097865
    gefen
    Participant

    Vogue – I can understand the teddy bears – they’re cute and cuddly.

    But imaginary friends??? That sounds a bit over the top for that age group IMHO.

    WIY- LOL. I was thinking something along those lines too.

    #1097866
    TheGoq
    Participant

    “just something to fry into at night”

    mmmm fried teddy bear ill take a thigh.

    #1097867
    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    *Sigh* I meant CRY……lol sorry!

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    Rabbi Perfect

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    Moskidoodle

    Zeeskeit

    #1097868
    Vogue
    Member

    Frying stuffed animals is a sign of pyromania.

    #1097869
    WIY
    Member

    Vogue

    Its a sign of insanity.

    #1097870
    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    Look its not me its this stupid spell checker! Gee, I got turn it off….wait. I don’t think I can!

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    #1097871
    Vogue
    Member

    pyromania is insanity. People end up in psych wards for it…

    #1097872
    SaysMe
    Member

    but pyromania is so much fun! fires and flames and matches and smoke and sparks, heheh so enticing!

    #1097874
    Vogue
    Member

    Like a bonfire? Welcome to camp!

    #1097875
    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    What is it?

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    #1097876

    “Vogue – I can understand the teddy bears – they’re cute and cuddly.

    But imaginary friends??? That sounds a bit over the top for that age group IMHO.”

    Actually, the way females are infantilized it doesnt suprise me.

    That is until they need to be working 80 hours a week while hubby learns all day 🙂

    #1097877
    Toi
    Participant

    crisis- you could use one.

    #1097878
    Torah613Torah
    Participant

    Vogue: I’m sorry but I have to call shenanigans. Normal emotionally healthy BY girls do not do this, and the few that do generally have security issues, and are embarrassed enough to keep it a secret.

    Having an imaginary friend sounds like a mild form of psychosis to me, which is fine as long as the friend isn’t telling you to hurt other people.

    Having dolls and such is not normal for an adult and a sign of emotional underdevelopment, so it’s probably a good idea to see a professional if you are considering it. (I’m wondering if this was a joke thread?)

    #1097880
    Vogue
    Member

    I never said this was a joke thread. My stuffed animals are almost never hugged by me. I only keep them so I have some for my children. My friends are the ones that make me stronger…

    #1097881
    WIY
    Member

    I have an imaginary teddy bear. I have no use for it you can have it if you want it.

    #1097882
    Vogue
    Member

    Does it look like this?

    (. .)

    I

    -/L

    #1097883
    WIY
    Member

    Vogue

    Its cuter.

    #1097884
    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    I don’t have imaginary friends….which is unfortuanate cuz I have no one on my side when my imaginary enemies come attacking

    #1097885
    Torah613Torah
    Participant

    Vogue: I was trying to give you an out.

    This is not normal and you should tell your friends to see a professional. (in a nice way of course) I think everyone can benefit from some counseling, so why not go yourself also? Then they will follow your lead. Use peer pressure to your advantage.

    #1097886
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    Maybe the thread is not a joke, but the animal hugging is. Like, maybe they thought it was cute to have a stuffed animal again.

    I like stuffed animals. I have one my uncle gave me that is very very big, like maybe 2 and a half feet tall. I brought it to yeshiva once because I thought it was funny. (And because I’m psychotic)

    #1097887
    Vogue
    Member

    If anything, I am the one among my friends that needs professional help…

    #1097888
    Torah613Torah
    Participant

    Vogue: If anything, I am the one among my friends that needs professional help…

    That is really impressive, that you can recognize that, and it is clear from your posting that you have a lot of potential to accomplish much in life if you deal with your issues now, while you are still young.

    Everyone can benefit from talking to someone about their problems, and I think you in particular have a lot to gain from going to therapy. Are there good frum psychologists where you live?

    #1097889
    writersoul
    Member

    I still have all my dolls from when I was a kid, but they’re mostly there for decoration (fancy china type) or just because if I put them in the basement they’d get thrown out. Also, like Vogue says, I want my kids to be able to have them later on if they want. I remember being little and finding all my mom’s old stuff from when she was a kid and thinking it was AMAZING, the coolest thing ever.

    Imaginary friends? Now THAT’S weird.

    Torah: While I don’t think that what Vogue describes is normal, aren’t you being a bit extreme?

    #1097891
    Vogue
    Member

    No

    #1097892
    Vogue
    Member

    I think many people can use therapy as well. Most normal people What ever that means tend to go through certain periods of time that are very difficult due to significant life changes. In my case I have very significant life changes more frequently than most people my age I know because I am in a very unique position. You would not just write whatever you want inside your mezuzah you would get professional parchment and a Rabbi to install them. And you get them checked every few years. If the mezuzah is like your emotions.then theoretically everyone will need an emotional checkup every once in a while. Nothing wrong with it.

    #1097893
    Torah613Torah
    Participant

    writersoul: We’re talking about adults sleeping with and cuddling dolls. My reaction is the only normal one on this thread.

    Vogue, I completely agree that many people could use therapy, and you are absolutely right that an emotional checkup is important, and I like your comparison to checking mezuzos very much.

    Do you mean there are no good frum psychologists in your area? Maybe we can ask the mods if TLIK or someone can send you some names?

    thinking about it. yes, should be fine.

    #1097894
    Vogue
    Member

    I don’t think this is a good idea.

    this mod is fine with it

    #1097895
    Vogue
    Member

    OK fine feel free but you don’t know where I actually live, and I don’t actually live in Denver.

    #1097896
    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    I’m also saying that..well, a lot of teens cant get help, money issues or other problems….I agree that everyone needs an emotional check -up but most teens cannot do that without their parents being nosy, hovering, asking questions they really don’t want to answer esspecially if they are going through a lot of personal change and feel their parents don’t understand and are just making things worse.

    Talking from expirience here

    #1097897
    Vogue
    Member

    I previously lived in my school. That’s all I can tell you.

    #1097898
    Ayayashreichem24
    Participant

    haha I’m post sem also and I have a teddy bear that I’ve had for ages!!! But I only really sleep with it when I’m sad/lonely lol…so most of the time it’s laying under my bed forgotten 🙂 I’ve brought it with me to camp and seminary- in fact my seminary friends adopted it and still occasionally ask about its wellbeing and stuff.

    One of my best friends has a bear that she had since she was born. And she still sleeps with it.

    It’s just a cuddly, pillow-like thing that’s easy to hug when you need something to hug

    #1097899
    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    Seee we arent crazy! Most of my friends brought hello kitty dolls that were like 10 years old to camp, and we were like 14 or so….these days its normal

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    #1097900
    Vogue
    Member

    I have a bear but I only hug it when I am super depressed when pillows aren’t sufficient. My mom has no clue.

    #1097901
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    Having stuffed animals and imaginary friends is okay. Needing stuffed animals or spending time with imaginary friends, or thinking they are real is not.

    #1097903
    shuli
    Participant

    Having a stuffed animal and imaginary friends are two completely different things.

    An imaginary friend (one you think is real) is a way children learn and develop into social beings, you can read a lot about children and friends like these. There are entire Psychology courses on this topic.

    Having a teddy bear/stuffed animal is usually for comfort/company when you’re sick or tired or just need something fuzzy to cuddle. They make good pillows and provide comfort when you need a good cry.There’s nothing immature about that.

    #1097904
    technical21
    Participant

    Liking teddy bears and stuffed animals has nothing to do with age- it has largely to do with personality. I’m more of the sentimental sort, so I have a number of bean bag pillows and assorted stuffed animals in my room.

    #1097905
    shuli
    Participant

    I have a bag in my closet of all my (many) stuffed animals from when I was a child. We call it the suffocation bag, where all of those friends go to die. I thought about donating them, but by now they’re all dead.

    #1097906
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    Do you still have your imaginary friend (if you ever had one)? If you don’t have one, would you consider getting one?

    #1097907

    it’s hard to know if something is still around if he was never really around in the first place.

    #1097908
    🍫Syag Lchochma
    Participant

    My father always bought stuffed animals for us. Not always random cute ones, sometimes they were more fragile but reminded him of something. Once he bought me a hen with two chicks under the wings because he said it reminded im of me. When he bought me a mom and baby camel for my 25th birthday my mom said he needs to find another hobby but I love them and they are all in my basement.

    I also have the ones he bought my sisters. And while she was in the hospital for a few weeks he bought her a bunch of really big ones. I have let my kids play with some because I don’t like them living in a plastic bag but they are never quite the same afterwards.

    I can’t look at a stuffed animal (or a thread about them) without thinking of my dad.

    #1097910
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    If you had an imaginary friend in childhood, sometimes he, she, or it can be imagined back.

    #1097911
    skripka
    Participant

    you have friends ? whats it like?

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