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I know I am 19 years old, but I have noticed that my friends, who are generally normal good, bais yaakov girls, emotionally healthy each either have an imaginary friend, a teddy bear that they sleep with, or a doll. I love my friends, but I am starting to wonder if I should just join the trend, or if I am bucking it by not having one of the above?
Thanks for the laugh. You don’t need a teddy bear you have tens of imaginary friends in the coffeeroom.
Vogue, its not a trend..its that these days a lot of terns in high school are insecure, depressed, or something else, sometimes it helps them to have such things for their self -estteem or just something to fry into at night and hug
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Vogue – I can understand the teddy bears – they’re cute and cuddly.
But imaginary friends??? That sounds a bit over the top for that age group IMHO.
WIY- LOL. I was thinking something along those lines too.
“just something to fry into at night”
mmmm fried teddy bear ill take a thigh.
*Sigh* I meant CRY……lol sorry!
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Vogue
Its a sign of insanity.
Look its not me its this stupid spell checker! Gee, I got turn it off….wait. I don’t think I can!
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but pyromania is so much fun! fires and flames and matches and smoke and sparks, heheh so enticing!
What is it?
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“Vogue – I can understand the teddy bears – they’re cute and cuddly.
But imaginary friends??? That sounds a bit over the top for that age group IMHO.”
Actually, the way females are infantilized it doesnt suprise me.
That is until they need to be working 80 hours a week while hubby learns all day 🙂
crisis- you could use one.
Vogue: I’m sorry but I have to call shenanigans. Normal emotionally healthy BY girls do not do this, and the few that do generally have security issues, and are embarrassed enough to keep it a secret.
Having an imaginary friend sounds like a mild form of psychosis to me, which is fine as long as the friend isn’t telling you to hurt other people.
Having dolls and such is not normal for an adult and a sign of emotional underdevelopment, so it’s probably a good idea to see a professional if you are considering it. (I’m wondering if this was a joke thread?)
I have an imaginary teddy bear. I have no use for it you can have it if you want it.
Vogue
Its cuter.
I don’t have imaginary friends….which is unfortuanate cuz I have no one on my side when my imaginary enemies come attacking
Vogue: I was trying to give you an out.
This is not normal and you should tell your friends to see a professional. (in a nice way of course) I think everyone can benefit from some counseling, so why not go yourself also? Then they will follow your lead. Use peer pressure to your advantage.
Maybe the thread is not a joke, but the animal hugging is. Like, maybe they thought it was cute to have a stuffed animal again.
I like stuffed animals. I have one my uncle gave me that is very very big, like maybe 2 and a half feet tall. I brought it to yeshiva once because I thought it was funny. (And because I’m psychotic)
Vogue: If anything, I am the one among my friends that needs professional help…
That is really impressive, that you can recognize that, and it is clear from your posting that you have a lot of potential to accomplish much in life if you deal with your issues now, while you are still young.
Everyone can benefit from talking to someone about their problems, and I think you in particular have a lot to gain from going to therapy. Are there good frum psychologists where you live?
I still have all my dolls from when I was a kid, but they’re mostly there for decoration (fancy china type) or just because if I put them in the basement they’d get thrown out. Also, like Vogue says, I want my kids to be able to have them later on if they want. I remember being little and finding all my mom’s old stuff from when she was a kid and thinking it was AMAZING, the coolest thing ever.
Imaginary friends? Now THAT’S weird.
Torah: While I don’t think that what Vogue describes is normal, aren’t you being a bit extreme?
writersoul: We’re talking about adults sleeping with and cuddling dolls. My reaction is the only normal one on this thread.
Vogue, I completely agree that many people could use therapy, and you are absolutely right that an emotional checkup is important, and I like your comparison to checking mezuzos very much.
Do you mean there are no good frum psychologists in your area? Maybe we can ask the mods if TLIK or someone can send you some names?
thinking about it. yes, should be fine.
I’m also saying that..well, a lot of teens cant get help, money issues or other problems….I agree that everyone needs an emotional check -up but most teens cannot do that without their parents being nosy, hovering, asking questions they really don’t want to answer esspecially if they are going through a lot of personal change and feel their parents don’t understand and are just making things worse.
Talking from expirience here
haha I’m post sem also and I have a teddy bear that I’ve had for ages!!! But I only really sleep with it when I’m sad/lonely lol…so most of the time it’s laying under my bed forgotten 🙂 I’ve brought it with me to camp and seminary- in fact my seminary friends adopted it and still occasionally ask about its wellbeing and stuff.
One of my best friends has a bear that she had since she was born. And she still sleeps with it.
It’s just a cuddly, pillow-like thing that’s easy to hug when you need something to hug
Seee we arent crazy! Most of my friends brought hello kitty dolls that were like 10 years old to camp, and we were like 14 or so….these days its normal
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Having stuffed animals and imaginary friends is okay. Needing stuffed animals or spending time with imaginary friends, or thinking they are real is not.
Having a stuffed animal and imaginary friends are two completely different things.
An imaginary friend (one you think is real) is a way children learn and develop into social beings, you can read a lot about children and friends like these. There are entire Psychology courses on this topic.
Having a teddy bear/stuffed animal is usually for comfort/company when you’re sick or tired or just need something fuzzy to cuddle. They make good pillows and provide comfort when you need a good cry.There’s nothing immature about that.
Liking teddy bears and stuffed animals has nothing to do with age- it has largely to do with personality. I’m more of the sentimental sort, so I have a number of bean bag pillows and assorted stuffed animals in my room.
I have a bag in my closet of all my (many) stuffed animals from when I was a child. We call it the suffocation bag, where all of those friends go to die. I thought about donating them, but by now they’re all dead.
Do you still have your imaginary friend (if you ever had one)? If you don’t have one, would you consider getting one?
it’s hard to know if something is still around if he was never really around in the first place.
My father always bought stuffed animals for us. Not always random cute ones, sometimes they were more fragile but reminded him of something. Once he bought me a hen with two chicks under the wings because he said it reminded im of me. When he bought me a mom and baby camel for my 25th birthday my mom said he needs to find another hobby but I love them and they are all in my basement.
I also have the ones he bought my sisters. And while she was in the hospital for a few weeks he bought her a bunch of really big ones. I have let my kids play with some because I don’t like them living in a plastic bag but they are never quite the same afterwards.
I can’t look at a stuffed animal (or a thread about them) without thinking of my dad.
If you had an imaginary friend in childhood, sometimes he, she, or it can be imagined back.
you have friends ? whats it like?
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