February 7, 2012 3:05 am at 3:05 am #601936adamsParticipant
I work some part time hours in public and sometimes don’t wish to converse with a customer. I was wondering if there is a Torah directive that I must go beyond Sever Panim Yafos?
Suppose I am learning or reading should I automatically put this down. You know that when someone is not giving their attention that they dont’ wish to converse.
In addition this may be also a societal – legal question, I was wondering what privacy rights I am allowed in the USA that is if some supplier is annoying, invading my privacy with conversation that i consider degrading to me, am I obligated to do nothing
or is there a right to say that so and so cannot have any contact with me?
I was interested in hearing perspectives. Particularly are we obligated to take the
‘high road’ from a Halachik perspectiveFebruary 7, 2012 3:28 am at 3:28 am #849932besalelParticipant
I’m not sure the halachik ramifications of your misanthropy but i do know that there’s a job at the dmv with your name all over it!February 7, 2012 4:01 am at 4:01 am #849933GoLearnTorahParticipant
There is a chiuv to make a kiddush Hashem… I’d venture to say that includes the high road.February 7, 2012 4:11 am at 4:11 am #849934oomisParticipant
Hevei mekabeil es kol ho’odom b’sever panim yafos does not mean you have to be his best friend or engage in an hour long dialogue, but it DOES mean that a modicum of friendliness and civility IS expected. There are many tactful and sensitive ways to get the idea across that you are finished conversing. it’s a matter of showing good manners.February 7, 2012 4:44 am at 4:44 am #849935🍫Syag LchochmaParticipant
I think it matters greatly if your conversing/availability is expected. A friendly security guard is nice but a stoic or quiet one isn’t insulting. If you are a salesman and people take your being busy as a sign that you are not available for questions, that may be rude. A bus driver could probably go either way, except for the part about reading a book.February 7, 2012 10:55 am at 10:55 am #849936moreMember
No, but theres no chiyuv to be a groutch either..lol:)
and it does say to greet one n’ all bsever panim Yafos.
there’s also sth called social cues… Tznius alzo plaiyz an elementz over chere…February 7, 2012 3:21 pm at 3:21 pm #849937ED IT ORParticipant
of course theres a chiyuv to be friendly it comes from the chiyuv of being happy,
? ?? ??? ???? ?????February 7, 2012 4:01 pm at 4:01 pm #849938wanderingchanaParticipant
I remember learning something like, if you greet someone with a sour face it’s like you’re stealing from them. I am paraphrasing and I don’t know the source. Anyone?February 7, 2012 4:14 pm at 4:14 pm #849939apushatayidParticipant
“I work some part time hours in public and sometimes don’t wish to converse with a customer.”
I dont know what you do, but conversing with customers might be part of your job description and not doing so might be a dereliction of duty.February 7, 2012 4:14 pm at 4:14 pm #849940🍫Syag LchochmaParticipant
I thought he was choosing between indifference and friendliness, not rudeness. Obviously rude and anti-social (though it works well for me) is NOT the way to go. But, as I wrote above, I don’t think the high rode is an obligation unless it affects your obligations.February 7, 2012 5:03 pm at 5:03 pm #849941oomisParticipant
Some people perceive indifference as rudeness. It always pays to be pleasant. You never know who will end up being your mechutan.
Or your kids’ boss.February 7, 2012 8:01 pm at 8:01 pm #849942Raphael KaufmanMember
The key word in the OP is “customer”. If you’re not pleasant to customers, pretty soon you won’t have any and the question will be moot. (not “mute”)
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