Kids at Kiddush

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  • #603757
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    People like to complain when the kids take all the seats at the kiddush, and then eat all the food.

    Well, of course they do. They are just as deserving of a seat at the table as anyone else. If there aren’t enough seats, it is the adults who are at fault, and should make sure there are enough seats.

    And of course there are lots of kids; and I’m glad there are.

    #934688
    apushatayid
    Participant

    As long as they don’t hog all the space at the bar.

    #934689
    Csar
    Member

    If there are insufficient seats for everyone, the children should allow the adults to sit instead of them taking seats.

    #934690
    pcoz
    Member

    herring and eier kuchel is wasted on kids

    #934691
    BTGuy
    Participant

    Hi PBA.

    There is nothing wrong with kids taking all the seats AND stacking them to see who can stack higher. Adults can stand so the food goes straight to their feet and not their stomachs.

    #934692
    MorahRach
    Member

    I agree somewhat. I find it hard to find fault with little kids in general. What bothers me is when the kids pile on the cholent and nuggets at a nice Kiddish and eat 1/10th of what they take!

    #934693
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    I allow everyone (kids and adults) to sit before I do at a kiddush, se’uda shlishis, etc. I sit only once I’ve determined that there is a seat for anyone and everyone else who wants one, regardless of age, level of learning, communal position, etc.

    The Wolf

    #934694
    dash™
    Participant

    If there are insufficient seats for everyone, the children should allow the adults to sit instead of them taking seats.

    There are certain classes of people one should give up their seat for. Adults are not such a class.

    #934695
    nishtdayngesheft
    Participant

    While it is respectful for children to give up their seats for adults, they are at least a hungry after davening.

    And some of the adults who are soooo offended by children seating want nothing more than to make sure they get the piece of herring they like.

    #934696
    Csar
    Member

    Adults should get their piece of herring before children get their piece.

    #934697
    kfb
    Participant

    It’s disgusting when kids take food and seats before adults! They need to learn to respect adults and this in no way teaches them that. Also what bothers me is when little kids run around and shul and no one says anything! It’s these liberal parents who let their children run wild, bc according to them how could you tell you child what to do??

    #934698
    147
    Participant

    Go to a Hashkomo Miyan and come home & eat breakfast at a decent hour, and when you thereafter attend a Kiddush, you won’t arrive there ravenous & famished & out of control with your pushing & shoving.

    #934699
    bpt
    Participant

    At a Bar Mitzvah or kiddush, they have the same rights as adults do.

    But at an oif ruf, the kids have already gotten peklach, so the adults should get first dibs on the kiddush.

    #934700
    seeallsides
    Participant

    Sorry, I disagree. I think it is disrespectful for kids to sit down when there are not enough seats to accomodate kids and adults. I can’t imagine a child sitting at a kiddush table when there is an adult that has to stand. I understand that it would be better if there were enough seats prepared for all the guests, but in the event that there is a shortage, adults should come first.

    #934701
    TheGoq
    Participant

    Bpt there is no kishka in the peklach.

    #934702
    ☕️coffee addict
    Participant

    If there are insufficient seats for everyone, the children should allow the adults to sit instead of them taking seats.

    let me quote part of the last mishna of Sotah

    “before Moshiach comes……. Zekeinim (old people) will stand Mipnei(Because of) Kitanim (Children under 13)

    #934703
    ItcheSrulik
    Member

    I’m with popa on this one.

    #934704
    yaakov doe
    Participant

    If you let the kids take seats at the kiddush, ext thing they’re going to want to join the kiddush club!

    #934705
    nycvoter1
    Member

    imho kids are hungrier than the adults hence they are not allowed to fast on fast days, an adult should not say anything and should probably make sure the kids have their food first, however as far as seating ( when there are not enough seats )it is up to the father to teach proper respect to his kids and what better chance than this.

    #934706
    Josh31
    Participant

    The new generation has to be taught to be respectful and also that Shabbos is to be enjoyed.

    #934707
    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    I allow everyone (kids and adults) to sit before I do at a kiddush, se’uda shlishis, etc. I sit only once I’ve determined that there is a seat for anyone and everyone else who wants one, regardless of age, level of learning, communal position, etc.

    and

    “before Moshiach comes……. Zekeinim (old people) will stand Mipnei(Because of) Kitanim (Children under 13)

    I’m glad that I’m doing my part to bring Moshiach.

    The Wolf

    #934708
    147
    Participant

    Sorry, I disagree. I think it is disrespectful for kids to sit down when there are not enough seats to accommodate kids and adults.

    seeallsides:- Until next time you get into a full car in the NYC subway system. People don’t stand up too quickly for anyone on a full train, but the moment a child walks on, there are always several people who will jump out of their seat to offer the child their seat, even if the parents have to stand up, and even if the child spends a substantial part of the ride, standing up and not utilizing his/her seat, but G-d forbid that anyone should even contemplate sitting on that seat & perhaps depriving this child of his/her seat if/when this kid finally decides to sit down.

    #934709
    bpt
    Participant

    “kishka in the peklach”

    Nor is there at the kiddushim at our shul. So they are on equal footing there.

    Now, herring / kugel on the other hand…

    #934710
    🐵 ⌨ Gamanit
    Participant

    before Moshiach comes……. Zekeinim (old people) will stand Mipnei(Because of) Kitanim (Children under 13)

    Most adults don’t go into the category of zaken. If a kid sees an old person or a talmud chacham, believe me they’ll stand up.

    #934711
    dotnetter
    Member

    Gamanit, whether the adult is over 70 (zakein) or not is irrelevant. A child should stand up for a 40 year old man/woman as well.

    #934712
    🐵 ⌨ Gamanit
    Participant

    A child can stand up and sit right back down. He/she is not required to give up the seat.

    #934713
    shnitzy
    Member

    He is required if the adult is unable to stand. Otherwise, that seat is fair game.

    #934714
    lesschumras
    Participant

    The biggest proplem is kids getting drunk when the liquor table is unsupervised.

    #934716

    Lesschumras- Many MO shuls have gone dry for this very reason.

    #934717
    shnitzy
    Member

    They could have just gotten a waiter to supervise.

    #934718
    Toi
    Participant

    less- maskim. nine year olds throwing up everywhere is gross.

    #934719
    rebdoniel
    Member

    Nobody should allow kids to ruin the mashke table for the rest of us. Whatever happened to kids going to youth group/NCSY/Bnei Akiva/Pirchei Groups on Shabbos morning? Don’t shuls do a teen minyan anymore? Let them have their own kiddush.

    Kids also do low-class things like take all of the same kind of rugelach, pick the meat out of the cholent, waste food, etc. In fact, with kids at a kiddush, they’re getting bad chinuch since the parents let them commit baal tashchis and borer.

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