November 9, 2010 6:36 pm at 6:36 pm #592961
what do you usually do on your lunch break? Do you go utside, and window shop? go to a restaurant? don’t take a break and eat at your desk?November 9, 2010 6:49 pm at 6:49 pm #709105
I usually run down to the (kosher) cafeteria, grab lunch, and eat at my desk while working. I take off a bit of time a bit later to catch a minchah minyan.November 9, 2010 7:20 pm at 7:20 pm #709106
Nothing Kosher anywhere near me (as would be expected).November 9, 2010 7:46 pm at 7:46 pm #709107
Gavra- aren’t u in nyc?November 9, 2010 7:53 pm at 7:53 pm #709108
And even if I was, there are plenty of places that would not have Kosher food near them (Harlem, I would think).November 9, 2010 8:10 pm at 8:10 pm #709109
You’re kidding, right? Lunch break is spent doing the same thing I do at the 10:00 break, the 11:00, 12:00 the …. (you get the idea)
The only exception is the mincha break, when I daven mincha.November 9, 2010 8:20 pm at 8:20 pm #709110
I would like to give everyone a very meaningful concept. Well known is the story about R’ Akiva and his wife. R’ Akiva came back after 12 years learning and heard her say, I’d gladly allow him to learn another 12 years. So he turned around and went back without saying hello thank you. The question of course is, why didn’t he say thank you. Rav Chaim Smulevitz ztzl answers simply. Because one single instance of 24 years solid learning isn’t the same as two times 12 years learning. Rav Dovid Olewski Shlita, Rosh Yeshiva of the Brooklyn Gerrer Yeshiva said at an Agudah conference, we can take a daily mussar haskel from this vort. Stop in the middle of the day and learn something for a few minutes. Because two times 4 hours with a learning break isn’t the same as one long stretch of 8 hours without learning. I told this to someone once. He told me a few months later that he retold it to his brother, a salesman. His brother told him lately that he decided to do that. Each day, no matter where he was on the road, he would stop his car and learn a mishne. And he said that over the few months his sales literally doubled.November 9, 2010 9:22 pm at 9:22 pm #709111
BPT- isn’t that when you eat the leftovers from last night’s supper?November 9, 2010 10:48 pm at 10:48 pm #709112
No, its too hard to hold a siddur and a plate at the same time.November 10, 2010 4:11 am at 4:11 am #709113
Coffeeroom!November 11, 2010 2:03 am at 2:03 am #709114
In Manhattan, non-Jews can eat within a block of where they work while a Jew may need to walk a few blocks to get to a Kosher place. I usually get coffee in place of lunch and do a little studying or listen to a shiur on my iPod.
Some guys combine lunch and mincha (this works out to be a late lunch) by showing up early, and eating their sandwich.November 11, 2010 3:37 am at 3:37 am #709115
Guys usually don’t have a problem congregating for a minyan in Manhattan but to all females in the corporate world, where do you daven mincha?November 11, 2010 3:09 pm at 3:09 pm #709116
I’ve been to many a “business Mincha” that had a mechitza.November 11, 2010 3:14 pm at 3:14 pm #709117
I daven Shachris and Maariv.November 11, 2010 3:22 pm at 3:22 pm #709118
I go to a corner of the office and daven mincha. This is only a problem during the winter, because the rest of the yr. I can daven when I get home.November 11, 2010 10:24 pm at 10:24 pm #709119
“I daven Shachris and Maariv.”
You’re kidding about maariv, right?
Please tell me you’re kidding.November 11, 2010 10:31 pm at 10:31 pm #709120
My daughters daven shachris, mincha, and maariv. Not kidding. BP guy there’s something wrong with that?November 11, 2010 10:47 pm at 10:47 pm #709121
Maariv? Woman? Lol!! I hardly get to manage saying birchas hashachar.November 11, 2010 11:25 pm at 11:25 pm #709122
Maariv? That I thought was a guy thing only. I know several girls who daven shachris and mincha, but not one of them daven maariv or know anyone who does.
It just took me by surprise. And Prof, I thought your kids did sit-ins. And they daven Maariv? Wow.November 11, 2010 11:49 pm at 11:49 pm #709123
Actually I’m not.
Maariv for me, came from less than noble intentions but I’ve kept with it… I think I started in 11th grade (dont worry, I dont go to shul)November 12, 2010 3:44 am at 3:44 am #709124
Why dont you Daven Mincha too? You have more of a chiyuv to daven Mincha than Maariv?November 12, 2010 3:56 am at 3:56 am #709125
I know someone who started davening Maariv but stopped when her brothers kept on making fun of her. In seminary she heard from a Rabbi that girls should daven Maariv. I wonder if she started again…
But seriously, I hate skipping Mincha but my office is an open one and there’s no corner where I can daven without everyone wondering why I’m randomly hitting my chest and bowing.November 12, 2010 2:15 pm at 2:15 pm #709126
I know I dont have a chiyuv for Maariv I just started doing it a long time ago and I think I would have to do Hatoras Nidorim to stop. Mincha isnt going to happen.November 12, 2010 2:45 pm at 2:45 pm #709127
A Woman Outside BrooklynParticipant
Getting back to lunch, mine is at my desk, usually check emails and look at the news (YWN and drudgereport.com) while I’m eating. I have to get in the car to go someplace kosher, so its not worth it. Much cheaper to bring lunch. I’m just grateful that people around here (I work in a secular environment) recognize when I’m benching and leave me alone then.November 12, 2010 4:45 pm at 4:45 pm #709128
Mincha according to many seforim (Halachically Shacharis is most important) is the most important or powerful Tefillah of the day because during our hectic work day we take off the time to recognize that there’s a Creator and everything we do in business or elsewhere in our lives is totally worthless without His blessing and help. We can’t succeed without Him. The Gemara says that Eliyahu Hanavi was Davening and Davening and was finally answered by Hashem at Mincha time (on Har HaCarmel)
That being said your father can be matir your neder if you never said bli neder. I don’t know all the rules but its an easy process.
If you already are Davening 2x a day make Mincha #2.Mincha is shorter than Maariv, its just ashrei shemonah esrei and aleinu I don’t even think you need to say tachnun. Look at it as though you are davening “Maariv” a few hours earlier.
You certainly have the 5-10 minutes it takes to Daven a quick Mincha. Although it may mean less time in the CR here we will all be happier knowing you are Davening to Hashem and putting Him before us.November 12, 2010 4:58 pm at 4:58 pm #709129
“That being said your father can be matir your neder”
I believe you need 3 men.
“If you already are Davening 2x a day make Mincha #2.Mincha is shorter than Maariv”
It’s not about switching up the battle plan or what is longer or shorter, I took on Maariv for a specific reason.
“Although it may mean less time in the CR”
Is there a way to daven Mincha discreetly, sitting by your desk. looking at your screen?
“Davening to Hashem and putting Him before us”
Dont flatter yourself.November 12, 2010 5:06 pm at 5:06 pm #709130
Hi there, when you work Mincha isn’t that simple. yes only 5 mins but still.. As a girl i also davened Mariv. beautiful thing.. So who cares if you don’t have a chiyuv? Some say it’s even nicer cause it is a nedava!November 12, 2010 5:22 pm at 5:22 pm #709131
WIY- Sac is correct. A father can be maifir his daughter’s nedarim only when she is a na’arah. Older than that, she needs a “beis din” or a chocham like anyone else.November 12, 2010 5:27 pm at 5:27 pm #709132
beis din” or a chocham
Squeak- Do us ppl in the CR qualify? 😉November 12, 2010 5:38 pm at 5:38 pm #709133
Nyet.November 12, 2010 5:40 pm at 5:40 pm #709134
squeak – how ’bout lurkers?November 12, 2010 5:44 pm at 5:44 pm #709135
I’m just going by what I see. A “Chochom”, who may be mattir nedarim as a party of 1, is defined as someone well versed in the halachos and prattim of nedarim. I haven’t seen anyone here lay claim to that.November 12, 2010 5:51 pm at 5:51 pm #709136
Well if you took on Maariv for a particular reason definitely stick with it unless it becomes too much of a burden.
But seriously you have a chiyuv to daven Mincha. Its not really optional. I don’t know your work environment but I can’t imagine there isn’t even 5 minutes to quickly Daven a Mincha.
People find time to do the things that’s important to them (like eat, go to the bathroom, shmooze with friends, send text messages…) nobody has time for Hashem. Its depressing.November 12, 2010 5:56 pm at 5:56 pm #709137
I haven’t seen anyone here lay claim to that.
Squeak- i was joking clearly 🙂November 12, 2010 5:59 pm at 5:59 pm #709138
“But seriously you have a chiyuv to daven Mincha”
Uh no, I dont. Woman have a chiyuv of davening 1 tefila that encompasses shevach and bakasha. Most poskim agree you need a Shmoneh Esrei. If you cant, Brachos can suffice as a bare minimum.November 12, 2010 6:04 pm at 6:04 pm #709139
Aha. Well for parnassah we can also live on a bare minimum. We can wear second hand clothing..but nobody wants that!!
Judaism isn’t about doing the bare minimum. A single girl should not be cutting corners. A married woman who has kids and is busy taking care of them has all the Halachic excuses. You have none except your contrived ones of course.
Most Halachic authorities hold like the Ramban that a woman must daven shacharis and mincha. The minimum is 2 shemonah esreis a day. I know you are a lawyer but there aren’t real loopholes for a single girl.November 12, 2010 6:34 pm at 6:34 pm #709140
The Mishna Berura says that Tefilla is a mitzva aseh shehazman grama, in which woman arent obligated. Yes, tefillah is mandatory by the Torah but at what time, it is not.
(I wasnt looking for a loophole, I do what works for me)November 12, 2010 6:50 pm at 6:50 pm #709141
The Rabbanan in the Gemara say that Tefillah is an exception bedcause Tefillah is a request from Hashem for mercy and women need that just as much as men do.
At the minimum you should Daven Shemonah Esrei. I think any competent Rav would agree with that statement. I challenge you to ask one.
With all do respect its not up to you to do “what works for you.” Trust me my life would be soooo much easier or entertaining if “do what works for me.”
I once complained to a Rav “I don’t feel like doing xyzabc so I don’t do it, I want to feel like doing it but I don’t. Well he said “your mistake is viewing it as though you have an option. You don’t have an option. You must do what Hashem commanded you. Now once you are going to do it anyways because you must, doesn’t it make more sense to try and do it with as much enthusiasm and enjoyment as we can muster?”November 12, 2010 6:56 pm at 6:56 pm #709142
“At the minimum you should Daven Shemonah Esrei”
I do. Twice a day.November 12, 2010 6:58 pm at 6:58 pm #709143
Shacharis and Mincha silly!November 14, 2010 3:07 pm at 3:07 pm #709144
I used to daven mincha in work. But I was in a frum office in BP and tho I was looked at strangely at first (due to the fact that the other girls were chassidish besides one who didnt daven mincha) eventually they got used to me and a couple of girls even started to daven mincha also!
And BP Totty- plenty of girls daven maariv. I dont (unless I’m by the kosel) but my younger sister davens maariv every night. (Not just Friday night, when some hold that you have a chiyuv because of kiddush)November 14, 2010 4:41 pm at 4:41 pm #709145
lets get back to eating, every body should have a break to eat because you gotta eat like a mench and not to combine it with any thing else like work or prayers. we hard workers deserve to eat in pease without being disturbed by anything. and i mean anythingNovember 15, 2010 1:54 am at 1:54 am #709146
I hope you spoke to a Rav about Mincha or are willing to take my word for it.
You can only gain from setting aside those extra few minutes to connect with Hashem.November 15, 2010 3:18 am at 3:18 am #709147
I work in an area of Manhattan where there are no kosher restaurants anywhere nearby. If I want to go out to eat, I’d have to hop on the subway and spend at least ten to fifteen minutes traveling by train.
The WolfNovember 15, 2010 3:22 am at 3:22 am #709148
“willing to take my word for it.”
After catching you making up a couple of halachos…. not likely 😉November 15, 2010 3:39 am at 3:39 am #709149
“After catching you making up a couple of halachos…. not likely ;)”
Thats not fair I retracted that one! I have no problem admitting it when I am wrong. 🙂
I cant make you do what you dont want to do but I am just informing you that it is a Chiyuv for you to Daven Mincha and it would probably add much needed spiritual content to your day and make it more meaningful. It seems like you are on a path of change and I just think that this can be a real boost in helping you along that path. Dont underestimate the power of a sincere Tefillah. The harder it is for you to do it the more it will mean to you and to Hashem.November 15, 2010 4:49 am at 4:49 am #709150
WIY! Leave Sacrilege alone!! You made your point and it’s up to her to decide what to do…enough already!
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