November 19, 2015 12:58 am at 12:58 am #616681
I know someone who works about 6-20 hours a week. Their work hours fluctuate and they are a full time student post high school who is responsible and spends at least 40-50 hours doing school work per week. Is it fair for their parents to make them pay for a cleaning lady if the house they live in is extremely large given the number of people who live there (has like four living room type areas seven bedrooms kitchen and three bathrooms, over half an acre of land)? They are constantly exhausted.November 19, 2015 1:07 am at 1:07 am #1113416
Being an adult ain’t what it used to be.November 19, 2015 1:34 am at 1:34 am #1113417
The parents should charge him room and board.November 19, 2015 1:35 am at 1:35 am #1113418popa_bar_abbaParticipant
Definitely not fair to hire a cleaning lady and then not pay her.November 19, 2015 1:38 am at 1:38 am #1113419
If you are asking about a post high school girl. The parents are last they should’ve started to train her 5 yrs ago (the latest).
why should anybody think they deserve to live rent free. If she is old enough to earn money she should pay for expenses.
If she does not want to she should move out. Is she 18 already?November 19, 2015 1:47 am at 1:47 am #1113420🍫Syag LchochmaParticipant
im thinking this thread makes absolutely no sense but until someone ties it into zionism i will consider it an oasis…November 19, 2015 2:00 am at 2:00 am #1113421
Some yellow police do not cross tape is a lot cheaper. Cordon off half the house. If people question the tape you could blame it on Zionists at the very least modern Orthodox.November 19, 2015 2:01 am at 2:01 am #1113422
Syag: 🙂November 19, 2015 2:05 am at 2:05 am #1113423popa_bar_abbaParticipant
im thinking this thread makes absolutely no sense but until someone ties it into zionism i will consider it an oasis…
Now that makes sense. It’s a moshol for zionism.
The zionists live in klal yisroel’s land, and have the gall to complain when asked to pick up part of klal yisroel’s expenses.November 19, 2015 2:07 am at 2:07 am #1113424🍫Syag LchochmaParticipant
<hands over ears, running away>
AHHHHHHH!!!!November 19, 2015 2:25 am at 2:25 am #1113425☕ DaasYochid ☕Participant
It’s a moshol for zionism. The zionists live in klal yisroel’s land, and have the gall to complain when asked to pick up part of klal yisroel’s expenses.
Brilliant.November 19, 2015 2:29 am at 2:29 am #1113426
I think it sounds reasonable. Either the child helps, or pays for help. If they are old enough to get married, they should be mature enough to chip in and help without being asked.November 19, 2015 2:32 am at 2:32 am #1113427
your talking about someone who can clean, would love to but is a full time college student has an extremely big house and nobody will help them clean. No siblings live there. student is struggling in school and is working.November 19, 2015 2:53 am at 2:53 am #1113428
Torah: Do you really believe a child cannot help before they are old enough to get married???November 19, 2015 4:05 am at 4:05 am #1113429wannabegood7Participant
absolutely not!!! y should she pay????November 19, 2015 4:11 am at 4:11 am #1113430
FrozenThaw: It’s still fair. Just think of how much money you are saving in rent.
You sound like a Zionist to me.November 19, 2015 4:21 am at 4:21 am #1113431
The government should pay. In fact i think it is already a provisionb in obamacare; that for all children over 18 living at home a cleaning help stipend of no less than $15 an hr will be provided.November 19, 2015 4:55 am at 4:55 am #1113432
Apy: typical liberal spending Obama, no cap on the number of hours…November 19, 2015 5:32 am at 5:32 am #1113433
Where does Obama come in here?November 19, 2015 6:06 am at 6:06 am #1113434
In response to APY’s Obamacare joke. But I guess if I need to explain my joke it’s not funny…November 19, 2015 6:45 am at 6:45 am #1113435
It’s a moshol about obama and zionism.November 19, 2015 6:54 am at 6:54 am #1113436sonMember
Now that makes sense. It’s a moshol for zionism.
The zionists live in klal yisroel’s land, and have the gall to complain when asked to pick up part of klal yisroel’s expenses.
No no, it’s about the chareidim; they’re not sharing the burden and the OP is a masmid who isn’t clear about joining/not joining the army!November 19, 2015 8:19 am at 8:19 am #1113437
A good compromise is having the post high school girl make sure her room is clean, the area she works in is clean. To be responsible for her messes. When she uses something she puts it away, when she works in the kitchen she cleans up after herself. When she involves in a project/or does something with other family members such as eats dinner, plays a game-she cleans up heer share.
What is this need for a cleaning lady?!? She should also have to pitch in a bit on shabbos to clean up after the younger ones since that’s when she has a it of a break. Shabbos is long enough to pitch in for an hour or two and get in extra sleep in the USANovember 19, 2015 12:24 pm at 12:24 pm #1113438
Shopping,, I think taking care of your own stuff is pretty basic. The OP says their parents want additional help for the general household.November 19, 2015 12:25 pm at 12:25 pm #1113439
Hurry its almost midnight!November 19, 2015 12:58 pm at 12:58 pm #1113440
Girls living at home should be the cleaning lady.November 19, 2015 1:08 pm at 1:08 pm #1113441
Joe you remind me of the orphanage master in Oliver Twist.November 19, 2015 1:33 pm at 1:33 pm #1113442
She’s probably OO and saving her energy to do the cleaning in the ???”? .November 19, 2015 1:56 pm at 1:56 pm #1113443
Well if she is that busy why should she be pitching in for other people. The way I see it if she pitches in her share than it’s fine. What if she didn’t live at home? There would still be the same ammount of work and the mom would have to pay for a cleaning lady anyway. If she’s pitching in enough that her presence isn’t adding to the balagan so it doesn’t matter!!!November 19, 2015 2:59 pm at 2:59 pm #1113444
Girls living at home can’t be cleaning ladies. Only ladies can be cleaning ladies.November 19, 2015 3:26 pm at 3:26 pm #1113445
Shopping: the issue seems to me that her parents (no younger kids at this point) have a bigger house than they can afford to easily maintain and are probably not so young either. For whatever reason they choose to continue living in this huge home but need their daugter?s help. Apparently she’s not paying for utilities, food or rent and although the house is a burden it definitely seems comfortable so she’s benefitting greatly.
The real questions are how much money are we talking about and how much is she earning? Are her parents paying for her schooling? I don’t have all information so I could be wrong but it seems to me she’s getting a great deal and some hakoras hatov is in order.November 19, 2015 3:40 pm at 3:40 pm #1113446
I never heard of Jewish daughters who don’t help out cleaning the house once they’re old enough to help out.November 19, 2015 5:46 pm at 5:46 pm #1113447HashemisreadingParticipant
My parents live by me now. I’m thinking they should pay for my cleaning lady..November 19, 2015 6:12 pm at 6:12 pm #1113448
Joseph: she actually said “They are constantly exhausted.” Which I assumed meant she is pitching in but because the house is HUGE it’s just never enough and they need hired help as well. Read the OP again to get a better idea.November 19, 2015 6:48 pm at 6:48 pm #1113449
But it’s not her responsibility. If they are 3 adults living in a huge house they shouldn’t be making such a big mess. It seems like most of the rooms aren’t normally in use so it doesn’t make a difference if she lives at home or not.November 19, 2015 8:28 pm at 8:28 pm #1113450
“student is struggling in school and is working.”
Maybe switch majors.November 19, 2015 9:55 pm at 9:55 pm #1113451
Just curious, why is everyone assuming the student at home is female? The OP has never once said this overworked student is a female.November 19, 2015 10:14 pm at 10:14 pm #1113452
“They are constantly exhausted.”
The parents? This might be a question for a Rav as hilchos kibbud av are involved.November 19, 2015 10:28 pm at 10:28 pm #1113453
apy: See my first comment above (third on the thread.)November 19, 2015 10:30 pm at 10:30 pm #1113454
The OP’s use of the singular “they” indicates that they do not wish to disclose the gender of the student. Everyone else thinks this is because the OP doesn’t want to say because it’s not tznius. But it’s perfectly tznius to talk about men.November 20, 2015 2:01 am at 2:01 am #1113455
The only household chores I do not think are tznius for women are mowing the lawn or snow shoveling. Taking out the garbage has no tznius issues or recycling.November 20, 2015 6:40 am at 6:40 am #1113456
Taking ut the garbage involves issues in a possibility in getting dirty.November 20, 2015 4:49 pm at 4:49 pm #1113457
So, there are several ambiguities here.
1: Who is tired, the parents or child, or both. Perhaps this impacts the question in some way.
2: Is the child male or female (although for the halachos of kibbud av, I dont know if that makes a difference but Im not an expert in those halachos).November 23, 2015 1:01 am at 1:01 am #1113458
But taking out the garbage does not take a significant amount of time unless you are a cleaning lady in a hotel with 500 rooms and you are responsible for all of them or you are responsible taking out all of the garbage in a skyscraper like the Empire State building.November 23, 2015 1:41 am at 1:41 am #1113459
The daughter should definitely be taking out the garbage.November 23, 2015 4:34 am at 4:34 am #1113460
Frozen Thaw: stop “playing us”. Your question seemed legitimate at first but it appears that you don’t have a problem of not having enough time (to clean) but have too much time on your hands… (And yes I know you were supposedly asking about someone else.)
Otherwise why can’t you answer the questions posed to you like a mensch?
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.