January 8, 2012 11:39 pm at 11:39 pm #601550mynamesixonethreeParticipant
How do you choose the Rebbe you wish to become close to, feel you can confide in, and ask your questions to? Seriously. I have a difficult time with this.January 9, 2012 12:17 am at 12:17 am #842178Abba bar AristotleParticipant
Maybe the first issue is “What is a Rebbe?” Maybe the first issue is “What is Torah?”
If you can grant that Torah is only what we can “prove” Hashem said, then a Rebbe has to fit that definition: Someone who helps you to know what Hashem says by means of “proving it”. I don’t mean to suggest that this is the only factor – there are many others – but perhaps the starting point is that Torah is not a “guessing game”.January 9, 2012 2:14 am at 2:14 am #842180YW Moderator-42Moderator
Ask your Rebbe 🙂January 9, 2012 2:26 am at 2:26 am #842181YW Moderator-72Participant
looks like cantoresq dug a little deeper and struck a new low…January 9, 2012 2:55 am at 2:55 am #842182Avi KParticipant
Rav Kook says in his perush on the siddur, Olat Rayah, that we ask Hashem to save us from a chaver ra after already asking Him to save us from a bad person because sometimes when two good people get together (mitchabrim) there is a bad result. This, Rav Kook says, is connected to the secret of neshamot that Hashem keeps to himself. I think that the same applies to choosing a rebbe. You come acrosss a rav with whom you feel a good kesher. Whether you choose him because of his hashkafa or choose your hashkafa because of him is probably a chicken-and-the-egg question unless you are very young. As for confiding, this is dependant on one’s personality. Some people tend to keep their own counsel, others confide in just about anyone and the rest are somewhere in the middle.January 9, 2012 2:39 pm at 2:39 pm #842183WIYMember
If you are in a Yeshiva then look around at the various Rabbeim, meishivs…find someone you look up to and think you can grow from. Granted not all Rabbeim are into having a Shaychis with the talmidim but there are many who are and if you seek to make a kesher I doubt you will be rebuffed. Try to set up a learning seder with this Rebbi even a very short one and even if it is only once a week.
Remember, even if its not the perfect fit you always gain from having a kesher to a Rebbi. If your life is complicated and you need someone for advice and guidance then I would tell you to probably seek out a Rebbi who is older and has seen it all because he probably has a lot more experience in dealing with people and giving advice.
Also, don’t think you can’t have a few Rabbeim. You can have more than 1. Lets say one to ask shailos to and one for advice…
At the end of the day the stronger kesher you have to Torah the better off you will be and a Rebbi (if you allow him to guide you and accept his advice) can really keep you on track and save you from a lot of stupid mistakes and problems.
HatzlachaJanuary 9, 2012 3:43 pm at 3:43 pm #842184NechomahParticipant
A “Rebbe” is usually for a chassid and the chassidim will follow their Rebbe and confide in him. For people in other streams of orthodoxy, you can find a Rav or a professional who you feel comfortable with.January 9, 2012 4:40 pm at 4:40 pm #842185cheftzeMember
Nechama, Litvaks and Yeshivish folks have a rebbe.January 9, 2012 5:48 pm at 5:48 pm #842186soliekMember
There’s a rebbe somewhere in my family whose grandfather was niftar and left him the mantle of rebbe. at the time he was learning in a litvishe yeshiva and wasn’t interested in being rebbe and didnt think he was worthy. so one of the chassidim told him “if we can take a cow and make it into a pair of tefillin, we can take a litvak and turn him into a rebbe”
and thats how you make a rebbe 😀January 9, 2012 6:16 pm at 6:16 pm #842187BTGuyParticipant
In my experience I didnt just pick someone.
I have been exposed to a few who I may ask questions to, depending on the situation.
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