Marrying for the Money

Home Coffeeroom Shidduchim Marrying for the Money

Viewing 13 posts - 1 through 13 (of 13 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • #1540485

    Joseph
    Participant

    What is the Torah hashkafa on money being a factor in whom you marry?

    #1540614

    1
    Participant

    It’s called life. You need money to pay for things. Utimately, Hashem is the one who decides how much you get and where it’s coming from. It’s a very big factor. The politically correct marriage therapist/shadchan crowd will try to make believe that it’s not there. It’s a factor. It could be manifested in a number of ways: does man have a job or in school to pursue a medical or law degree? Does he plan on learning in Kollel. The check won’t pay for your utilities, rent, or food. In that case, does she have a job or do both or one family have the money to support this?

    #1540615

    mazal77
    Participant

    As a quote I once heard, “those who marry for money, will soon lose nterest”

    #1540631

    laskern
    Participant

    Money can be a factor but not the main factor.

    #1540643

    Phil
    Participant

    Joseph,

    Are your three wives no longer supporting you in the manner to which you’ve become accustomed?

    #1540645

    Joseph
    Participant

    1. If money being a factor is a correct approach, does this inhibit the marriage prospects of aniyim (the poor) in Klal Yisroel?

    2. From a personal perspective would you reject a shidduch for yourself or your children, or consider it a big minus when considering the shidduch, if the potential shidduch candidate is poor?

    3. Do you believe that it is appropriate to specifically seek a shidduch with someone from a wealthy or upper-middle class family?

    #1540655

    Takes2-2tango
    Participant

    It says sheker hachen v’hevel hayofee. No mention of kesef or mamon, so maybe joseph has a point after all (not)

    #1540671

    DovidBT
    Participant

    If there is no flour, there is no Torah.
    Avos 3:21

    #1540684

    WolfishMusings
    Participant

    כָּל אַהֲבָה שֶׁהִיא תְלוּיָה בְדָבָר, בָּטֵל דָּבָר, בְּטֵלָה אַהֲבָה. וְשֶׁאֵינָהּ תְּלוּיָה בְדָבָר, אֵינָהּ בְּטֵלָה לְעוֹלָם.

    The Wolf

    #1540688

    TheFakeMaven
    Participant

    The Torah Hashkafah as to this matter is stated clearly in Even HaEzer 2:1.

    #1540694

    jew boy2
    Participant

    A GITTEN EREV SHABBOS!!!

    #1540759

    Solaro
    Participant

    כל הנושא אשה לשום ממון הווין לו בנים שאינם מהוגנים -Kiddushin 70a

    #1541650

    Midwest2
    Participant

    I second the Wolf and Solaro. And it isn’t just by Yidden, either.

    I know plenty of people who devoted their lives to chinuch, not worrying about money, and found they had trouble marrying off their daughters because they could’t offer support. To quote one person, “How could HaShem be punishing me for doing what’s right?” And yet there is a real problem. The mothers of the boys, who think their precious son has a right to sit in kollel and be supported into old age (or are afraid to tell their friends that the kallah’s father can’t afford it), refuse to hear shidduchim unless they see the big bucks. And so, as Solaro says, the grandchildren have problems. The OTD problem has more than one root, and I think this may be one of them.

Viewing 13 posts - 1 through 13 (of 13 total)
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.


Trending