Maybe I'm Jealous

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  • This topic has 20 replies, 11 voices, and was last updated 11 years ago by bpt.
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  • #598251
    adorable
    Participant

    I dont think I am but I just went out with a friend of mine last night who’s getting married in a couple of weeks. she was ver natural and not talking about her chosson at all but we were! she is the first one of us to get married and were all very excited for her… On our way home, we dropped her off at her chossons house and he was outside waiting for her. (let me mention here that they dont really keep to their “rules” and they go out almost every night and text/talk all the time. I know its not healthy but this is how hes leading her and shes fine with it. she was told not to say anything to him and just follow his lead) she went running up to him and they sat on chairs talking….we just left and went home. I could not stop thinking the whole time how I’m not nec jealous of her (she is marrying a really wealthy, good solid family and a great guy) because shes a sefardi and I would never even be able to marry her chosson (which makes it a little easier) but still felt bad the whole night. I dont know whats bothering me about it. maybe Im just nervous for her…i dont know

    #791274
    ☕️coffee addict
    Participant

    Yeah your jealous 😉

    but realize this isn’t what’s meant for you you’ll find someone that will fit you perfectly

    I know of someone that was jealous of someone else that she was marrying a certain guy and it turns out a year later the guy is totally controlling and that girl wouldn’t like to be with him (and glad she isn’t)

    #791275
    adorable
    Participant

    not sure if I am because I clearly know that hes not for me and would be not possible to work

    #791276
    maskingtape
    Member

    you’re not jealous of the boy she got, only of the fact that she’s getting married before you

    #791277
    ☕️coffee addict
    Participant

    exactly maskingtape

    #791278
    a mamin
    Participant

    Don’t worry!!! Your time will come, hopefully B.E.H. very soon!!!

    #791279
    kako
    Participant

    I didn’t understand the point about her being sefardi. What about it?

    #791280
    adorable
    Participant

    AMEN! Thank you

    #791281
    bpt
    Participant

    Ditto to maskingtape.

    #791282
    adorable
    Participant

    but I’m loving every single second of my single life! I think the fact that they are basically just boyfriend/girlfriends now makes it hard.

    #791283
    am yisrael chai
    Participant

    Maybe you should remove the word “maybe” from this thread’s title and you’ll be on your way to fixing the issue.

    It was pretty evident when you recently “joked” about someone burying her husband, and you are not at all a mean person.

    ???? is one of those things that are ??????? ?? ???? ?? ?????.

    Hashem has His own time frame for you, and when you accept that your spouse’s apparent delay is in your best interest, the jealousy will disappear be”H.

    At that time we all here will celebrate with you be”H.

    #791284
    adorable
    Participant

    i dont get what that joke had to do with anything

    #791285
    mommamia22
    Participant

    It’s normal to feel jealous. It’s part of life. What matters is what you do about it. When I went through a period of infertility/miscarriages, I had a very hard time seeing people on the street who had children, let alone a whole group of them. I then asked myself “why am I jealous?” and I realized it’s because I wanted children to love and to guide/teach. I then understood that this is Hash-em’s will and I should be grateful and happy that the children were brought into the world somehow, even if not from me. I said a little kapitle of tehillim for those families that they should grow and be well and be zoche to more. It was very painful for me, but it actually lessened the pain when I Davened for them and looked at myself as being a smaller part of the klall. Pray for your friend that she should be happy (even if you don’t feel it or mean it/it will connect you to her and you will with time feel more joy) and be grateful to Hash-em that He helped her find her zivug so she can grow more and tell Hash-em that you look forward to finding your own. Be’ezras Hash-em, you will be rewarded with a wonderful person whom you will say was worth waiting every minute for. Hatzlachah rabbah!

    #791286
    adorable
    Participant

    maybe im jealous that shes getting married and marrying such a great family but not nec jealous of the guy. until now I felt that my single time was a gift and i loved every minute of it but last night it just hit me that its time for me to move things

    #791287
    bpt
    Participant

    ” it just hit me that its time for me to move things “

    Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock….

    Gotta time frame in mind? (My guess is down the aisle by late Feb)

    #791288
    adorable
    Participant

    bpt- yes im thinking that too.

    #791289
    kapusta
    Participant

    Hey, you givin’ out brachos?

    *kapusta*

    #791290
    jmj613
    Participant

    Could u explain what you meant with the fact that they’re just boy/girlfriend makes it hard?

    #791291
    smartcookie
    Member

    Adorable- you’re not jealous of her Chosson, it’s just that you would also like a real good guy for yourself very soon.

    That’s very normal.

    #791292
    adorable
    Participant

    I meant that they are in a stage now where there’s not commitment to each other yet because they are not married but they can talk, text and be out at night as much as they would like

    #791293
    bpt
    Participant

    ” Hey, you givin’ out brachos? “

    I did even better. I said the whole tehillim on Purim. I’ve seen one result so far, (and am waiting for several more) My list was pretty targeted, but also included everyone in need of a shidduch under the general header, so that means you too!

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