June 6, 2013 4:10 am at 4:10 am #609554
So I used to listen to English music. Like anything and everything. About a month ago- I had enough and I stopped cold turkey. I kept only a few songs that were not remotely connected to love or anything. Otherwise, I’ve been doing the Benny Friedman thing. Now, I’m beginning to listen to English music again but with strict boundaries for myself because I don’t want to sink as low as I did previously. Here’s my question: I’ve learnt in school that when it comes to conquering middos, one should go to the opposite extreme and then find their healthy balance. So I went to an extreme for myself by not listening at all, and now I’m okay with listening to certain songs that don’t conjure up disgusting images. Does that make any sense?June 6, 2013 4:12 am at 4:12 am #957457popa_bar_abbaParticipant
I don’t know if the methods for changing character traits are the same as the methods for stopping to listen to music.June 6, 2013 4:14 am at 4:14 am #957458
pba- it might not be. Thats my question. I’m also wondering how its possible to maintain strong boundaries for myself and not spiralling right back down from where I came from.June 6, 2013 4:28 am at 4:28 am #957459kkls45Member
I did the same thing as you, but I knew that if I would put even a few non-Jewish songs on my ipod I would just end up wanting to put on more and more and eventually get right back to where I used to be. So the middle ground that I got to was that at the beginning ever time I heard the any English music I wanted more, so I completely stopped. but now I am able to go places that are playing the music and be with people who are listening to it without wanting more and wanting it on my ipod.
I don’t know about you but for myself I didn’t find it so possible to just keep “some” of it.June 6, 2013 4:45 am at 4:45 am #957460Israeli ChareidiParticipant
I think you’ve chosen the correct method. Music is very powerful and the ta’ava to misuse it is very strong in our generation. I’m not sure I would recommend the “Benny Friedman thing” though (for reasons I’d rather not discuss in a public forum – feel free to ask mods for my contact info if you’d like to discuss it further).
May you continue to have much hatzlocho in wichever method you choose! It sounds like you’ve already made tremendous progress!June 6, 2013 4:55 am at 4:55 am #957461haifagirlParticipant
Why don’t you just listen to English music that is religious? There are plenty of those, such as “Mama Rochel.” (Okay, I know part of it is in Hebrew, and part in Yiddish, but basically, it’s an English song.)June 6, 2013 5:12 am at 5:12 am #957462Shopping613 🌠Participant
Define the benny friedman thing? Whats wrong with his music???? These days, everyone tells me i cant listen to half of even the jewish music….June 6, 2013 5:28 am at 5:28 am #957463kkls45Member
Shopping, Im with u. there is nothing wrong with benny friedman’s music.June 6, 2013 1:10 pm at 1:10 pm #957464
Haifagirl- when I said english music, I meant non- jewish music
shopping613 & kkls45- no you got me wrong. I love Benny Friedman. He’s my favorite singer. But, no matter how awesome a Jewish singer is, its a little hard to get totally excited and love his music, when you’d so much rather non- Jewish musicJune 6, 2013 2:04 pm at 2:04 pm #957465DaMosheParticipant
haifagirl: Because most “Jewish” music these days is garbage, and can’t compare in quality to non-Jewish music. Most Jewish singers try to cope the style of non-Jewish music, but don’t do a very good job of it.June 6, 2013 2:58 pm at 2:58 pm #957466smartcookieMember
When I said trees, I meant socks.June 6, 2013 3:12 pm at 3:12 pm #957467WIYMember
To be honest it is highly questionable if it is even possible to find any contemporary non Jewish songs that are kosher. If its Kol Isha you have that problem and if its a man you still have a problem with the lyrics. Even if its not a love song it is very likely that some of the lyrics will still be problematic either for foul language, or hinting to inappropriate things, or just because the hashkafos (whatever the theme of the song is) discussed in the song are bad and anti Torah.
Theres nothing wrong with listening to Benny Friedman and if you go to mostly music you can listen to samples from every genre of Jewish music until you find some wholesome artists you like.June 6, 2013 3:16 pm at 3:16 pm #957468WIYMember
It will take a lot longer than a month to get “out” of listening to non Jewish music. Realistically it can take 6 months or longer for it to be really out of your system and you need to be cold turkey with the non Jewish music across the board. You cant have it in your car or at home or on your ipod or whatever. Delete any non Jewish music you have and make it as unavailable as possible.June 7, 2013 7:22 am at 7:22 am #957469Shopping613 🌠Participant
Actually, i seem to be able to find kosher music. Alot of women compose songs because they think jewish music these days isnt really jewish. They do nice soft tunes, with beautiful, meaningful, lyrics straight from theyre heart. Its such a shame tge only people who think to do that thses days are the women. Men really dont have anything purely kosher. Im not saying that the other artistss (Benny Freidman or Avraham Fried) arent kosher, but in every artist these days yoy will find out somethings goyishe in at least one song.
Ex. Did you know the hit song : Yofyofisa that Shasheles and Junior came up with, the exact song and melody were taken from a hit called Breakaway, that was made in the 1900’s?
And many YBC and MBC were also taken from old non-jewish songs…..
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