May 28, 2014 3:48 pm at 3:48 pm #612902May 28, 2014 6:23 pm at 6:23 pm #1017907notasheepMember
The problem with babies is that the older they are, the harder it is to train them to self-soothe. It will take work, but it’s worth it. First night, put her to bed and soothe her (you know what she likes) with calm music, a crib mobile, back/stomach rub or gentle stroking. After a few minutes, when she is calm, leave the room. She may be a little unsettled, and if this is the case you should go back in every ten or fifteen minutes and repeat until she is sleeping. The next night, cut back the number of times you go in the room, and the night after that, cut back again. Eventually (it could take up to two weeks at that age) she will learn to put herself to sleep. I did this when my oldest was three months and it took a few days (she was NOT easy to sleep train).
Good luck!May 28, 2014 7:51 pm at 7:51 pm #1017908sm29Participant
It depends on the baby and age. At first, they need the comfort to learn trust and security. After awhile, when they are ready, then you help them slowly to soothe them self. It takes time for them to adjust, but it helpsMay 28, 2014 9:45 pm at 9:45 pm #1017909baruchderrinParticipant
did you try giving some gripe water such as ‘little tummys’ which are usually all natural made of chamomile and other good safe things. that has helped us. also, always make sure to get a good burp after eating before sleeping
invest in a couple good soothing lullaby albums
we never felt the cry it out method was for us as we feel a baby should not be left to ‘self soothe’
the first couple months by us were intense, no sleep, bh it will get easier soonMay 28, 2014 9:52 pm at 9:52 pm #1017910oomisParticipant
I feel for you. My first child was a very colicky baby for a full year. He was the worst spitter-upper, to the point that the doctor thought he had pyloric stenosis, where the pyloris muscle is in spasm and the breast milk or formula cannot go and stay down. We thought he would need surgery at 5 weeks, but it turned out to be “only” really bad colic, B”H. My husband and I took turns sleeping for nearly a year. The baby slept 15 minutes of every hour. His longest stretch was shy of 2 hours. Not easy. But I am still here nearly 36 years later, B”H, so gam zeh ya’avor for you as well.
I would strongly recommend that if the baby is not vomiting or ill in any way, that you get a set of earplugs and let her cry. I would never do that with a newborn; they need to learn they are safe and secure in their parents’ response to their needs. But by 8 months, your daughter is training YOU, not vice versa. Put a fan on in her room, for white noise (she might be a light sleeper also), and then lovingly say good night (very good to have a specific routine done every single bedtime, including saying shema to her and singing Hamalach). The continuity will help her to self-soothe.
I am blessed to be able to babysit for my ainekel every weekday morning, and he knows that naptime (he is just shy of 2) means Bubby will hold him on her lap and sing “aileluli” a Yiddish lullaby my mom O”H sang to me. He knows without my saying a word that he will put his head down on my shoulderas I sing to him and rock him gently, and then he has lately begun to sing along – slightly off-key (which unfortunately cracks me up, and thus spoils the ambience I am trying to create).
However, where this used to put him right to sleep in thirty seconds or less, now he only needs to be put into the Pack and Play after singing with me for a few seconds, and he puts his head down and goes to sleep on his own. Kids learn quickly, and they love and need routine.
Hatzlacha rabbah. I DO know how frustrating this is. I never had such a problem with any of my other children. And I wish you to see the same ease that I had with my other kids. There IS a light at the end of the tunnel.May 28, 2014 10:08 pm at 10:08 pm #1017911SpiceofLifeMember
A baby with reflux is a different case than a baby without.
If the reflux gets dealt with (how? Any tips?), then the sleeping problem should resolve, or at least improve.
Hatzlocha RabbaMay 29, 2014 4:37 am at 4:37 am #1017912SaysMeMember
if your baby at 8 mths still has severe reflux that she wakes up every 15-30 minutes crying, why isnt that being dealt with? If reflux is waking her in pain, ignoring her cries or routines wont get rid of her painMay 29, 2014 2:39 pm at 2:39 pm #1017913
Thanks all for the encouragement and bracha.
We had searched on Amazon to find this device that plays music with a picture projection, it also has a noise activation when the baby starts to cry or makes a peep it goes on. I would recommend this to other parents it was very inexpensive.
Funny last night she actually slept for 3 hours in the crib before screaming at the top of her lungs. I just put the pacifier back in her mouth and to my amazement she went right back to sleep. I hope this is the beginning.May 29, 2014 7:41 pm at 7:41 pm #1017914oomisParticipant
Only once you pick her up the screams stop (she is a smart cookie).”
There you have it in a nutshell. Things will egt better. I promise.May 30, 2014 2:08 pm at 2:08 pm #1017915
Thanks, I wonder if there is a mute button on her lolMay 30, 2014 5:00 pm at 5:00 pm #1017916hbeMember
As a father of a couple of colicky babies (some of them are in their teens already), I can feel for you. We let our babies cry themselves to sleep. It takes a lot of perseverance,and is not for the faint of heart, but it definitely pays off. I know it doesn’t sit well with your wife, but getting a good set of earplugs (at least for her) will help you – and your baby (I can’t imagine that a baby who only takes small catnaps can be happy) – immensely.
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