February 10, 2011 9:37 am at 9:37 am #594908
I have a terrible habit that when I’m bored, nervous or just anytime, my fingers find their way to my lips and I start picking, pulling, ripping… I wish I can stop but I can’t help myself, did anyone have this habit and successfully stop? How?
(I also heard trying during the week to stop this habit gives you schar for shmiras shabbos, it will be easier on shabbos to refrain – it is VERY hard for me on shabbos, and is the first thing I do when shabbos is out.
Any help will be appreciated!February 10, 2011 3:31 pm at 3:31 pm #739627
1.Ask your close friends WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE to others.(unattractive,etc.)
2.Give your HANDS a substitute activity.
3.Reward yourself FOR EACH MOMENT OF RESTRAINT.This accumulates “traces of will power” which eventually make you more in control.February 10, 2011 3:54 pm at 3:54 pm #739628yummy cupcakeMember
i have the same problem!!!!!!! and i know how gross it looks to other ppl because i’ve seen others do it but it doesnt stop me!!!!!!!! i like eclipse’s other suggestions tho! i’ll try anything! (well, almost)February 10, 2011 3:56 pm at 3:56 pm #739629yogiboobooMember
umm- you are NOT alone! i do it day and night. My husband cant stand that I do it. but i cant help it. as a matter of fact as i read your post I started picking. It is such a bad habit. Shabbos is worse. I try to not make myself bleed but if my husband catches me he warns me shabbos shabbos. and i say “wait ok yeah i know but one more pull.” i’ve been doing it for years. at night i put on this aquaphor type stuff from CVS to just calm it down and moisten it but next morning im back to picking. i also chew the inside of my mouth(lips) im just “addicted.” im totally together with you on this one!February 10, 2011 4:04 pm at 4:04 pm #739630
My husband can’t take it either, that’s why I’m looking to stop… (besides that it’s painful when your lips are so dry!)February 10, 2011 4:05 pm at 4:05 pm #739631
Just noticing a pattern, do you think it’s only a female thing??February 10, 2011 4:05 pm at 4:05 pm #739632yummy cupcakeMember
wow, i didn’t know it was THIS common!February 10, 2011 4:19 pm at 4:19 pm #739633always hereParticipant
a Rebbe who worked in the same yeshiva as I did used to pull @ his beard… enuf to make it sparse.
pulling lips (ouch! I actually never heard of this before): a female thing?
pulling beard hairs: a male thing?*
* duhhh.. I just re-read my post, lolFebruary 10, 2011 4:19 pm at 4:19 pm #739634yossi z.Member
No it is not a only a female thing, I do it too. The best solution I found was keep your lips moist but not too wet (otherwise you have soggy skin wich, you guessed it, peels)
😀 Zuberman! 😀February 10, 2011 4:26 pm at 4:26 pm #739635
Maybe you could all pretend you’re on a date,or that a video camera is on you….February 10, 2011 4:31 pm at 4:31 pm #739636real-briskerMember
I think a good solution is to put on a vaseline to prevent the lips from becoming chap, and then you will not have anything to pick.February 10, 2011 4:36 pm at 4:36 pm #739637TheGoqParticipant
i sometimes bite the crook of my hand between the thumb and forefinger how weird is thatFebruary 10, 2011 4:54 pm at 4:54 pm #739638candy613Member
yeah the best thing to do is to keep something on your lips at all times! Whether you like carmex, vaseline, ect. if you have some nasty oily thing on there you wont want to touch it! Its just like the cure for stopping thumb sucking. Put nail polish on because you dont want that chemical taste in your mouth.
GOOD LUCK 😉
>O<613February 11, 2011 2:01 am at 2:01 am #739639HaLeiViParticipant
Oh, so that’s you, Goq?
Just kidding, by the way.February 11, 2011 3:17 am at 3:17 am #739640
If you want to stop picking your lips, you should put hot pepper on them,so that if you lick them, it will hurt.February 11, 2011 3:21 am at 3:21 am #739641candy613Member
there is nothing wrong with licking your lips, except for the fact that it will probably get them dryer. We’re talking about picking here lol
>O<613February 11, 2011 3:24 am at 3:24 am #739642TheGoqParticipant
lol haleiviFebruary 11, 2011 3:25 am at 3:25 am #739643
I think people have to work on underlying issues, before trying to force themselves to stop. It might be a good idea to see a therapist.February 11, 2011 3:45 am at 3:45 am #739644s2021Member
health- was that a joke? cuz i lafed.. girls- i hate when my lips get dry so i wear a lip gloss thats also moisturizing! i love it!February 11, 2011 3:47 am at 3:47 am #739645Smile E. FaceMember
health-does picking your lips indicate underlying issues, or are you joking? cuz then it seems like a lot of us are in trouble…. :0)February 11, 2011 3:47 am at 3:47 am #739646RezdyMember
i like hot peppers so i would lick my lips anyway!February 11, 2011 4:40 am at 4:40 am #739647yankdownunderMember
Try a chapstick sold at the Health Food Shop made with Shea Butter, which is a good Moisterizer for the lips, hands during the Wintertime. Alternatively it could be a sign that you need to hydrate and may need to drink Water or some other Beverage.February 11, 2011 4:53 am at 4:53 am #739648Ctrl Alt DelParticipant
A bitterant helped me stop biting my nails.February 11, 2011 6:52 am at 6:52 am #739649
s2021 & Smile E. Face –
Why would I joke with a name like Health?
Some people who bite their nails have underlying problems.
This sounds to me much worse than that. It sounds as a very destructive habit. Could be a lot of people who do this have some underlying issue.February 11, 2011 6:55 am at 6:55 am #739650HaLeiViParticipant
It’s not so hard to follow Health’s advice. You can buy Lip Therapy.February 11, 2011 7:01 am at 7:01 am #739651i am hereMember
wow its so common i do it to but not so often or i just realize that i am doing it when it hurts. you know like when you pull to much. its a habit in the winter more cause thats when ur chapped more anyways vasiline is good to put on cause u don’t want to get it on ur lips.
Just realized i was doing it while re reading my post before i submit it its kinda weird maybe its even a sub conscience thing.February 11, 2011 7:27 am at 7:27 am #739652
I’m not talking about picking because your lips are dry, moisturizing them won’t help! I’m talking about it for the sheer enjoyment of getting off a good peice – ahhhh! It’s for the habit persee.
Health: get a life, you seem to think there are ‘underlying’ issues behind EVERYTHING!, not everyone has to see a shrink for every dumb thing he or she might do. This is a habit my mom has too and lots of us have caught on, it’s annoying, maybe even unpleasant, but there are no deeper issues behind it! I like pickles with most of my meals, there must be an underlying issue, maybe i have a fear of tasting things on their own, lest the taste be really horrid, it probably boils down to self-confident issues, no?February 11, 2011 11:22 am at 11:22 am #739653Shticky GuyParticipant
So basically it would seem some posters need help with their shmiras halashon… They seem to be kvad peh and kvad lashon and need help watching/guarding their lips. Netzor..mei’ra… sefasecha…February 11, 2011 11:40 am at 11:40 am #739654Mother in IsraelMember
I used to have the same habit but I managed to kick it. It does help to put on Vaseline because you can’t “get a good piece” when they’re not dry. It’s very difficult not to pick dry lips. Mostly willpower is what made me stop doing it, but keeping them moist definitely helps.February 11, 2011 11:44 am at 11:44 am #739655
Skin picking and hair pulling (trichotillomania), to my knowledge, is a habit and one form of OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder). If you google “help for skin picking” there are many web sites that can be helpful. I wouldn’t say someone picking their lips has underlying psychological problems, it’s just a habit that they do without thinking that for some reason they find pleasurable. Except that it does damage to your lips. You could also seek out a cognitive behavioral therapist that deals with skin picking and set out a plan of action how to stop (no you don’t have to talk about your deep problems, childhood etc.) good luck!February 11, 2011 11:59 am at 11:59 am #739656
You could also try putting bandaids on your fingers to remind you not to pick your lips and to make it harder to pick.February 11, 2011 2:30 pm at 2:30 pm #739657chayav inish livisumayParticipant
spread poison on ur lips that way u wont touch themFebruary 11, 2011 2:33 pm at 2:33 pm #739658Sister BearMember
A and D ointment is awesome!!! It makes your lips normal in like 2 days and plus it looks like you’re wearing lip gloss.
I find that I only wanna pick my lips on Shabbos and have to do everything in my power not to. But when Motzei Shabbos comes, I don’t need to pick them anymore. Weird!!!February 11, 2011 4:12 pm at 4:12 pm #739659
With Chayav’s advice,you won’t HAVE any lips to worry about!Problem solved.February 13, 2011 5:40 pm at 5:40 pm #739660
For all those in denial -This is from Mass. General Hospital OCD clinic web site, under glossary:
This would include lip picking!February 13, 2011 6:02 pm at 6:02 pm #739661deiyezoogerMember
men pulling their beard-sounds familiar whats wrong? why should it be called weird? love doing it. never thought into it. too busy. from now on gotta give some more thought.February 13, 2011 6:07 pm at 6:07 pm #739662
You could also put a gag in your mouth so you can’t pick with your lips and tie your hands so you can’t pick with them either.February 13, 2011 6:11 pm at 6:11 pm #739663
not funny popa_bar_abba. You wouldn’t write this if you suffered from this. It’s important to show sensitivity to others.February 13, 2011 6:21 pm at 6:21 pm #739664
Suffered from this?
I don’t think anyone complained of “suffering” from this.
But if it helps, I also bite the dead skin off my lips. It has never bothered me.February 13, 2011 6:26 pm at 6:26 pm #739665
Health: For all those in denial -This is from Mass. General Hospital OCD clinic web site, under glossary:…
Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think this probably means, picking because you’re trying to harm yourself i.e. mental illness (I have a friend who did this – she had bipolar)… not someone picking because of a habit that they enjoy, not EVERYTHING boils down to majorly deep reasons, it’s a plain old habit like any other.
editedFebruary 13, 2011 6:33 pm at 6:33 pm #739666always hereParticipant
umm~ ummmm… I think you may want to look up dermatillomania & trichotillomania on wikipedia & then make an informed decision re: ‘enjoying a plain old habit’ :/February 13, 2011 6:57 pm at 6:57 pm #739667
umm -You’re wrong- That’s what they mean. This isn’t mainly a sub-type of bipolar. This is a sub-type of OCD.
I looked high and low for a reputable site, so noone could say -“Eh, you brought a proof from some guy who doesn’t know what they’re talking about.”
deiyezooger – “men pulling their beard-sounds familiar whats wrong?”
It’s only trichotillomania if you pull out tons of hair, that you have a bald spot or almost one.February 13, 2011 7:05 pm at 7:05 pm #739668Anonymous91Participant
I guess i’m not the only one suffering from this…but so far it doesn’t seen like anyone has actually provided a good way to combat this behavior. If anyone has a GOOD way that may help please post!February 13, 2011 7:11 pm at 7:11 pm #739669
Popa, people are suffering from skin picking and picking lips..
“I have a terrible habit that when I’m bored, nervous or just anytime, my fingers find their way to my lips and I start picking, pulling, ripping… I wish I can stop but I can’t help myself, did anyone have this habit and successfully stop? How?”
another poster wrote about picking her lips so much that she is bleeding, and she feels bad that she picks on shabbos.
they are seeking help here, not jokes.
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