Rants on Demand

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Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 15 total)
  • Author
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  • #2164404
    Zaphod Beeblebrox
    Participant

    Beeblebrox International is only mildly ashamed to announce the launch of our latest service: Rants on Demand! ™️. Basically, what happened is my doctor told me that I’ve become so laid back that my blood pressure has become dangerously low, so I should try to get worked up about something to raise it. But I can’t think of anything, so here we are. Please write exactly what you would like a rant to be written about, if you’re for or against the subject matter, and leave the rest to us! We look forward to yelling at you.

    Sincerely,
    Zaphod.

    Ps. Please don’t post about how I shouldn’t post things like this because it wastes your time. News flash: I don’t care. I’m Here to waste your time. That’s what I do. If you have an issue with that, great! Post about it and we’ll be happy to write a rant about why we shouldn’t write rants. We are Beeblebrox International. We have no shame.

    #2164938
    Participant
    Participant

    WB Good to hear from you. I may be the only one who enjoys your threads, b
    How much do I get to charge for providing you with rant material and basically saving your life?

    #2165070
    Yserbius123
    Participant

    Can you write a rant about pointless sophistry on the Internet and how it is Bad For The Jews?

    #2165139
    huju
    Participant

    The opening post is supposed to be funny, but it is not. Nothing to rant about.

    #2165157
    Sam Klein
    Participant

    Can you just ask AI to write something and just copy and paste it into this coffee room topic?

    #2165369
    n0mesorah
    Participant

    Dear Zaphod,

    I’m a big fan! Please write me a rant being disrespectful to me. Certain posters are shying away from being critical of my posts.

    #2165816
    yechiell
    Participant

    i would like to rant on how most orthodox jews were, and still are, in awe and enamored of that orange-haired demagogue, liar, lecher, con-artist, sore loser and dining partner with nazis – his name escapes me

    #2165838
    n0mesorah
    Participant

    While your at it, let’s have a rant for how under appreciated the mods are.

    #2166893
    n0mesorah
    Participant

    After an extensive investigation, I have determined that Beeblerox International has never produced a single rant. As they say on theyeshivaworld.com, they truly have no shame.

    #2167953
    catch yourself
    Participant

    I request a rant on how terrible it is that politicians consider themselves above the law. Nobody knows this better than the President of the Galaxy, so I’m expecting a rather lengthy discourse.

    #2167982

    Of course, the simplest application of text learning is do the mod job. If the mods were to send me an archive of the posts they rejected, it should be possible to train a mod bot for at least some of that hard work.

    #2168176
    Zaphod Beeblebrox
    Participant

    Hello, all. Due to unforseen circumstances, we have been unable to comply with your demands at this time. We apologize most deeply, and hope that the problem will soon be solved, allowing us to once again be your preferred company for idiocy. We thank you for your patience, and we would like you to know that we appreciate your continued support.

    (A rant will be forthcoming as to the exact nature of this problem. It’s very ranteable.)

    #2168197
    ☕️coffee addict
    Participant

    I don’t think there’s an e in rantable

    #2168362
    Participant
    Participant

    Sorry doesn’t cut it.

    #2175545
    n0mesorah
    Participant

    Dear Zaphod,

    Can I please get a rant on how college is a kugel?

    Professional education

    Thanks

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