March 4, 2013 9:41 pm at 9:41 pm #608447
Does anyone know what they are and if yes can you please post them?
ThanksMarch 4, 2013 9:53 pm at 9:53 pm #1044295yytzParticipant
I believe they’re listed in his book Career of Happiness. I don’t have it on hand right now.
A shalom bayis manual I highly recommend is Garden of Peace by R’ Shalom Arush. There are separate men’s and women’s versions. It’s much different than R’ Avigdor’s advice (The men’s version at least — I haven’t read the women’s one.) Following R’ Arush’s advice really works wonders.March 4, 2013 9:56 pm at 9:56 pm #1044296
1. Never speak to your husband while he is drinking beer.
2. Never speak to your wife while she is fetching your beer.
3. Never drink the last bottle of beer, without clearing it with one another.
4. Budget for beer–it can’t be expected to come from the regular beverages budget.
5. Be a good designated driver. Make sure to attend any wedding or other event where your husband will want to drink.
6. No zmiros or divrei torah at the shabbos table. Tables are for eating and drinking off of.
7. It is important to talk about your feelings, and you should not do anything else while you are doing so. Therefore, you should not talk about your feelings if there is anything that either of you want to do.
8. Your husband is not a cleaning lady. Don’t ask him to wash the dishes or mop the floor.
9. Your husband is not your babysitter either.
10. Lo Sachmod. It doesn’t matter that your friend’s husband helps out at home and isn’t a drunk and has a real job.March 4, 2013 10:06 pm at 10:06 pm #1044297
# 10 is my fave. Anyways we know your ten commandments but I would still like Rav Miller’s.March 4, 2013 10:11 pm at 10:11 pm #1044298SaysMeMember
popa- sometimes you really make me wonder what kind of person you are irl. They say there’s a grain of truth in every joke. Your sense of humor is really warped at times… Makes me pity the females in your family.March 4, 2013 10:24 pm at 10:24 pm #10442992scentsParticipant
I just remember the first one, Don’t be a tyrant!March 4, 2013 10:33 pm at 10:33 pm #1044300yitzykParticipant
You can probably find one of his shiurim with them on Kol Haloshon. Why not get them straight from his holy words, instead of from here?
Technically, it is still coming from the internet, but you know what I mean.March 4, 2013 11:06 pm at 11:06 pm #1044301
saysme: Many of the posters know me in real life. Ask them.March 4, 2013 11:15 pm at 11:15 pm #1044302
Popa, now I think you’re a woman and you have an insanely low self esteem.
I like 7March 4, 2013 11:48 pm at 11:48 pm #1044303SaysMeMember
popa- any females?March 5, 2013 5:04 am at 5:04 am #1044304yytzParticipant
Here they are, from Career of Happiness, ch. 3. You’ll have to read the chapter to see his full explanations.
1 Be realistic
2 Do no disrupt the routine of marriage
3 Make peace
4 Never say the word “get”
5 Be loyal
6 Never say “I hate you”
7 Love your neighbor as yourself
8 Display your regard for your mate
9 Maintain your appearance
10 Do not be a tyrantMarch 5, 2013 5:13 am at 5:13 am #1044305
Popa, do ANY of those sound familiar? 😉March 5, 2013 1:25 pm at 1:25 pm #1044306Torah613TorahParticipant
I like the Rav Avigdor Miller speaks series.March 5, 2013 6:18 pm at 6:18 pm #1044307
Is # 4 get as in gimmel tes a divorce contract? If not what does he mean? You can’t say can you go get whatever from the wherever for me?!March 5, 2013 6:41 pm at 6:41 pm #1044308Oh Shreck!Participant
WIY, Obviously in the Jewish sense ??. He writes that it should be completely out of the dictionary, never, ever mentioned c”v even as a joke. Once that word is uttered, a certain defensive “barrier” has been broken.March 5, 2013 7:01 pm at 7:01 pm #1044309
I agree. A certain trust is lost. Then c”v, things can snowball from there.March 5, 2013 8:40 pm at 8:40 pm #1044310
Thanks a lot!November 24, 2014 5:14 pm at 5:14 pm #1044312MDGParticipant
“4 Never say the word ‘get’ “
That is why PBA used the word “fetch”:
“2. Never speak to your wife while she is fetching your beer.”November 24, 2014 7:19 pm at 7:19 pm #1044313
saysme: Many of the posters know me in real life. Ask them.
And of course, popa neglects to say who they are or how to contact them.November 28, 2014 10:59 am at 10:59 am #1044314RandomexMember
But they’re posters on the CR, and so they can be contacted here
without even knowing their usernames first. Presumably, what kind
of person Popa is in real life can be talked about without giving
away his identity.
(The original poster seems to have taken the saying about truth in jokes and decided that it means that the jokes a person tells say something true about them, rather than that jokes are based on actual phenomena… I suppose that’s true as well to an extent, but it goes without saying.)
See what I did there?November 28, 2014 3:37 pm at 3:37 pm #1044315
Randomex is my daughter in law. She can answer any questions about me.November 28, 2014 4:46 pm at 4:46 pm #1044316
Randomex, are you indeed to be pitied, as per SaysMe?November 28, 2014 5:23 pm at 5:23 pm #1044317hashtagposterMember
#Do we believe that?
Randomex?November 28, 2014 9:35 pm at 9:35 pm #1044318midwesternerParticipant
I believe Bar Shatya knows Popa. Also, Abba bar Aristotle can help you too.
I have met Popa on several occasions. I believe there is not much that gives him as much pleasure as when people take it seriously when he is yanking their chain.
If his attitude bothers you so much, well as they say, don’t feed the trolls!!November 30, 2014 12:26 am at 12:26 am #1044319
I have met Popa on several occasions.
So tell us! Is he as sweet and soft spoken in real life as he seems in the CR?
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