May 4, 2011 10:24 pm at 10:24 pm #596666
Luxury Spacious Home In Pakistan.
Great Location In Quiet Wealthy Neighborhood.
Reduced For Quick Sale Cos No TV, Phone Or Internet Service Available And No Helipads On Roof.
Very Secure – Next To Large Military Base.
Suits Long Term Or Invalid Occupancy.
Near Local Zoo – Was Once Invaded By Seals.
All Amenities Inside: You’ll Never Need To Go OutdoorsMay 4, 2011 10:37 pm at 10:37 pm #768490
Further reduced as prior occupants had no time to clean up
Affordable cheap labor to help with that
Great business opportunity to timeshare for the famous who want to vacation under the radarMay 4, 2011 10:44 pm at 10:44 pm #768491
Includes great courier service and room service
Wireless interior, wired exteriorMay 4, 2011 11:14 pm at 11:14 pm #768492LemonySnicketParticipant
Not worth it. The garbage will pile up quickly cause are no Bins (hehe). :pMay 4, 2011 11:46 pm at 11:46 pm #768493
The garbage will pile up quickly cause are no Bins
Quite the contrary. I heard the Bins were Laden with garbage.May 5, 2011 12:08 am at 12:08 am #768494
Building professionally Sealed
No bed bugs. Rats disposed of.May 5, 2011 1:07 am at 1:07 am #768495zaidy78Participant
Truthfully, it is probably a great investment now. One day it will probably be turned into a museum with a mosque.May 5, 2011 3:10 am at 3:10 am #768496
A piece of history
Inhabitants a mysteryMay 5, 2011 7:37 am at 7:37 am #768497
Zaidy78 (There’s no mod78 is there…??? Just wondering cos you pop up about once in two months…):
The whole Bin Laden episode is a tremendous source of embarrassment to the Pakistani authorities and the allegedly all-knowing pakistani secret service, the I-C-NO-I-DONT. Time will tell how much they really knew of Laden Garbage Bin’s hideout. If it turns out that they were completely unawares then there’s no way they will allow that building to remain standing cos it will be the proof and symbol of their largest booboo, and I’m sure they will demolish it.
So if you were looking for a retirement home, I’m sorry. Anyway, it has cameras sending images half way across the world, not to a cave in Torra Borra but to a white house in the DC areaMay 5, 2011 8:48 am at 8:48 am #768498hanibParticipant
lolMay 5, 2011 3:29 pm at 3:29 pm #768499smartcookieMember
This thread made me smile today! You people actually have very creative descriptions!May 5, 2011 6:37 pm at 6:37 pm #768500adorableParticipant
I was wondering where you think you are going to be telling us to move to….you are very cute i must say! thank you for the laughMay 5, 2011 7:38 pm at 7:38 pm #768501600 Kilo BearMember
Taken. I already brokered it to the Neturei Karta. They want to open up something like a Chabad House for their Muslim brothers – it will be called Beis Chaval of Abbottabad.May 5, 2011 11:11 pm at 11:11 pm #768502
Deal fell through
They couldn’t get a mortgageMay 6, 2011 5:40 am at 5:40 am #768503
Mortgage? Those things dont exist with these people. They move into new houses in one of 2 methods:
With a large bag of cash
With the help of an AK47May 8, 2011 5:10 am at 5:10 am #768504
Didn’t know NK had either of those
Btw, Shticky,this thread is really funny 🙂May 8, 2011 7:23 pm at 7:23 pm #768505
If previous owner returns,you must evacuate immediately.(He might,y’know!)May 8, 2011 8:36 pm at 8:36 pm #768506
How did Osama pass the time in his house? No internet, no phone,no midnight strolls, NO CR! For how long can you play solitaire? 5 years?May 8, 2011 8:47 pm at 8:47 pm #768507
Hopefully in the live positionMay 8, 2011 8:58 pm at 8:58 pm #768508
(my response was to eclipse; the mods are obviously inundated with all our posts)May 8, 2011 9:06 pm at 9:06 pm #768509yaakov doeParticipant
BSD – He had 5 wives with himMay 8, 2011 9:12 pm at 9:12 pm #768510
Eclipse and ayc- they are actually turning it into a museum. As we speak, there are deep sea divers scouring the ocean floor in order to recover his remains so that they can restore him to his home and keep it as authentic as possible. The cr will be posting visiting hours. Bring along nose plugs.May 8, 2011 10:09 pm at 10:09 pm #768511
Ewwwwwww!May 8, 2011 11:07 pm at 11:07 pm #768512
BSD – He had 5 wives with him
Whaaaat? 5 wives? For 5 years? Under one roof? I almost feel for the guy! How did he manage with 5 mothers-in-law????May 8, 2011 11:14 pm at 11:14 pm #768513GumBallMember
ShtickyGuy- I WANT THE HOUSE!!!!!May 8, 2011 11:40 pm at 11:40 pm #768514
Are they taking single Moms with Sect.8?:)
(they probably divide THE TENANT into 8 SECTIONS)May 9, 2011 2:01 am at 2:01 am #768515
eclipse lol!!!May 9, 2011 6:39 pm at 6:39 pm #768517
Building still for sale
All your needs will be met.
But you won’t.May 9, 2011 7:18 pm at 7:18 pm #768518
I may be interested. Just a few questions:
How far is minyan? Is it Ashkenaz or sfard?
What kind of shechita?
How are the neighbors? Are they tzniyusdik?
Do they have an eiruv? Or am I not supposed to ask?
Does their vaad not allow internet or was it just Osama’s frumkeit?
Will my kids be accepted into schools? Are they more chassidish or litvish? Do they speak Yiddish?
What kind of town is it? Is it like Monsey? Lakewood? Boro Park? Out of town?
Does Kova or Bencraft have a branch there?
These midnight raids-are they a regular occurrence? I could sleep thru most things, but this sounds a bit much.
Do they have good courier service?
How do I get there? Are they still running those helicopter tours?
To which wife do I give the down payment? Do I give it to his son? Which one?
Is there anything else I need to know before I buy?May 9, 2011 8:53 pm at 8:53 pm #768519
Also, can I volunteer for the chevrah kaddishah, or is that taken already by the SEALs?May 9, 2011 10:23 pm at 10:23 pm #768520
JUST RELEASED! “OSAMA BIN LADEN”
COMING SOON TO A SHORE NEAR YOU!May 12, 2011 10:22 am at 10:22 am #768521Ken ZaynMember
LOL to you all ? ? ?May 12, 2011 2:53 pm at 2:53 pm #768522
Any answers to my questions? I don’t like to go into things blindly.;)May 13, 2011 5:45 pm at 5:45 pm #768523bptParticipant
Thanks for the revival AYC. Great puns!May 13, 2011 6:03 pm at 6:03 pm #768524
And can someone please bump the “great real-estate” thread?
With pleasure. This was requested on another thread, a “best personal thread” thread. Yes, we’re very good at bumping. Bumping up, bumping off…May 13, 2011 8:52 pm at 8:52 pm #768525
bpt, glad you are enjoying Shtick’s thread along with many others!May 13, 2011 8:57 pm at 8:57 pm #768526
Ok, BSD, I’ve spoken to the real estate agent & have some answers for you:
“How far is minyan?” Depends…a minyan of what?
“What kind of shechita?” As long as you keep out of sight, you have nothing to worry about.
“How are the neighbors?” You mean, “Who are the neighbors?” (Does that answer your question??
Ok, let some other agents respond to your other pressing queries.May 13, 2011 9:35 pm at 9:35 pm #768527
AYC- “Depends…a minyan of what?” Ma’aminim of course! The kind of people that are prepared to be moser nefesh.
“As long as you keep out of sight, you have nothing to worry about.”
Those were Osama’s last words…
I dunno maybe I’ll wait for another deal to come along. I’m still behind on payments for a bridge I bought.May 15, 2011 2:07 am at 2:07 am #768528
BTW, did Shticky sell you that bridge by any chance?? 🙂May 15, 2011 9:48 am at 9:48 am #768529
did shticky sell you that bridge?
No I didnt sell it. It could have been a bridge too far. Too long to go into great detail, so you’ll have to do with this abridged answer.
can I volunteer for the chevrah kaddishah or is that taken already by the SEALs?
No no no! You got it all wrong. The SEALs dont work for the chevrah kaddishah, they only supply them with customers…
Ps Such a shame OBL died before achieving his stated aim of muslim control in all corners of the earth without learning that the earth is in fact round… 🙂May 15, 2011 2:46 pm at 2:46 pm #768530☕ DaasYochid ☕Participant
How far is minyan? Is it Ashkenaz or sfard?
On site minyan, five times daily, nusach Wahhabi. Doesn’t face mizrach, though; the minhag is to face Qiblah.May 15, 2011 5:29 pm at 5:29 pm #768531
AYC-Shticky is an awesome agent. I paid a mare pittance for the bridge. I’ll make back all my money as soon as I get those toll booths set up…May 15, 2011 6:37 pm at 6:37 pm #768532
BSD- some people will have the chutzpa to bypass those toll booths by flying w/ Sealed helicoptors…May 20, 2011 2:11 pm at 2:11 pm #768533
With up to 9 wives holed up with him, OBL couldnt have been armed otherwise if would have shot himself…
And why are the al qaeeda guys upset? They have all now moved up their rankings.
Bin Laden has had the ultimate waterboarding experience. He went up to heaven where he was met by 72 vegans.May 20, 2011 4:39 pm at 4:39 pm #768534
When Osama got up there, George Washington, Thomas Jefferson etc. greeted him wielding batons and beating him. When he started yelling for his promised paradise they responded “here we are , your 72 Virginians”May 20, 2011 5:54 pm at 5:54 pm #768535adorableParticipant
some people here can sell me anything and i would buy it from them…you are so convincing!
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