Should I buy my chavrusa a fancy cheescake for shavuos?

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Viewing 18 posts - 1 through 18 (of 18 total)
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  • #1972737
    dag1
    Participant

    Or will it make him feel indebted to me? He’s a bigger talmud chachom then me and he still learns with me so I feel like I owe him.

    #1972761
    Participant
    Participant

    why not stick with a copy of your sefer and give me the cheesecake.

    #1972990
    Gadolhadorah
    Participant

    What is a “fancy” cheesecake?? Is it made from cream cheese derived from a special cholov yisroel from cows who are known for being machmir on every inyan of kashrus?

    #1973021
    commonsaychel
    Participant

    Does the fancy cheesecake come with a poster?
    @GH the cheese comes from the cows that belch less to minimze climate change

    #1973126
    yuda the maccabi
    Participant

    if you feel hakoras hatoiv i think you should buy him something nice
    in my opinion a cake is not something that will make someone feel indebted to you
    but it will show him that you appreciate him and what he does for you

    #1973196
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    You can buy me the cheesecake, I won’t feel indebted to you.

    #1973230
    meir G
    Participant

    how is your chavrusa financially , if he learns with you and could use the money- than do something that means something ( if you are in the position maybe 1800 for yom tov )
    dont worry about his indebtedness to you – unfortunately 1800 will barely get one kid into camp for HALF A SUMMER!

    #1973232
    DovidBT
    Participant

    Making the cheesecake yourself would imbue it with more meaning.

    #1973262

    meirG, koneh leha haver, indeed!
    please help a poor Talmid Haham to send a way just one kid for half a summer has a ring to it …

    mier can be right and your friend will really appreciate a financial gift. It may though change a relationship to a more financial one … I find I have better relationship with Talmidei Chachamim who had time for my questions when I was dirt poor with no financial payoff in mind.

    #1973415
    meir G
    Participant

    imagine calling a big lawyer lewin, brafman, dershowitz and saying a i have a legal question for you , what would be his answer?
    yet you can call or go over to any big posek and ask your halacha shaaloh for free bekovod ubesever panim.. with no fee

    always ask.. give the check anonymously to his wife & it wont change your relationship , figure what yom tov cost you and match it ( if u can)

    #1973834
    Reb Eliezer
    Participant

    What is wrong with hakoras hatov for him learning together with you? Dibbuk chaverim increases your Torah knowledge.

    #1973858
    commonsaychel
    Participant

    @rebE, spoken like a true fiftysixer, ó milyen édes egy csók a kezében

    #1973911
    Reb Eliezer
    Participant

    common saychel, are you Hungarian? I never heard this expression. He might feel as a rebbi, mitalmidai yoser mikulom, you gain from students more than the teachers. also beholden.

    #1973928

    meirG > imagine calling a big lawyer
    rebE> What is wrong with hakoras hatov

    rebE – attitude described here.
    Meir, his law degree is his, and Torah is Hashem’s and you are l’hathila not supposed to charge for it. I know there are ways, but I am thinking of your attitude where you assume as a most desirable thing to pay your hevrusa, and (jokingly?) dismissing the amount that it will “only” pay to send only one kid for only one month.

    I know I sound like a spoiler of cheesecakes, but I am simply trying to align our actions with our values, as sometimes we get used to doing something that may not be the best without AAQ.

    I like Meir’s suggestion to slip it anonymously. DISAPPOINTING and DANGEROUS for you – to suggest through the wife. So, if we agree that there is a little lack of kavod to pay to Talmid Haham, kavod of his wife is the same as of him. So, let’s protect his feelings, but his wife’s – not? As we know, women’s prayers are answered immediately… but slipping it in is a good idea – paying more than usual when attending simchos, or paying and not attending, adding when schools collect for specific teachers (is it a thing in your area?).

    #1973930

    traditional ways to support Talmid Haham:

    – buy from him, instead of other merchants. I do that sometimes. YD 234:4 תלמיד חכם שיש לו סחורה למכור
    – do business with him. Rambam De’ot 6:2. This is harder, you need to be confident that your business is honest and successful.

    #1973934
    commonsaychel
    Participant

    Reb E im 100% Galitz, I married a 100% hung, this expression is very common

    #1974445
    efshar azoi
    Participant

    cheese = my chavrusa in at bash gematria!!

    #1975409

    we need an update on what happened with the chevrusa and the cheesecake!!

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