March 6, 2017 10:24 pm at 10:24 pm #619413👑RebYidd23Participant
How come boys get to slowly kill themselves and it’s socially acceptable, but when girls do it it’s suddenly taboo?March 6, 2017 10:28 pm at 10:28 pm #1222796YW Moderator-29 👨💻Moderator
(T)March 6, 2017 10:36 pm at 10:36 pm #1222797
What is this (T) business for goodness sake? Can someone please explain?March 6, 2017 10:36 pm at 10:36 pm #1222798
In the CR, it’s only boys who smoke who are OTD. Girls are allowed to smoke as much as they please.March 6, 2017 11:12 pm at 11:12 pm #1222799akupermaParticipant
How is it respectable for boys to smoke? While historically women have tended to be less inclined towards addictive vices (smoking, drinking, various other drugs), that may be due to either biological or cultural factors that cause women to be more level headed (if you hold by Darwin, if young women tended to be as crazed as young men, it would seriously interfere with child rearing and be very dangerous for the children).March 6, 2017 11:19 pm at 11:19 pm #1222800
I don’t know if it’s true that women are less into addictive vices than men. Women are more into alcohol, and they probably drink as much coffee as men do. It’s true that those things are less dangerous than smoking, but I don’t think that’s the reason why. I highly doubt that the reason that women enjoy chocolate more than smoking is because it’s less dangerous.
I think that smoking and getting drunk are somehow less feminine than eating chocolate.March 6, 2017 11:19 pm at 11:19 pm #1222801
Also less tznius (maybe that’s what makes them less feminine).March 6, 2017 11:24 pm at 11:24 pm #1222802yytzParticipant
Smoking is assur for men, according to nearly all authorities, and is in fact taboo in many communities.
Men’s alcohol consumption is way higher than women’s, for Jews and non-Jews alike.
It’s possible women eat more chocolate, but it’s actually pretty good for you (especially dark chocolate.)March 7, 2017 12:26 am at 12:26 am #1222803
Generally speaking… In modern society, women typically turn their pain inward, against themselves. Depression. Eating disorders. Cutting. Acting out in relationships.
Men on the other hand are more likely to turn outward, turn to drugs/substances, and act out with more risk-taking behaviors and overt aggression.
yytz: AFAIK, LU was not talking about eating chocolate for its health benefits in tiny pieces. It also has a lot of caffeine, at least the healthy stuff, which also has an effect. But I digress.
When she means chocolate, I am guessing that she means CHOCOLATE. I’ve known chocolate. At those times, no one would ever think to tell me that such chocolate was a healthy thing. It’s a whole nother chocolate experience.
Good point overall 🙂
RebYidd23 love… Don’t you worry. Women do get their chance at killing themselves slowly.
<<<I live in a glass house though so that’s it for me.>>
Peace 🙂March 7, 2017 12:40 am at 12:40 am #1222804
I actually had some dark chocolate tonight. Thank you YYTZ for allowing me to eat chocolate guilt-free.
Yes, I was fleishiks. (why else would anyone in their right minds eat pareve chocolate? But it actually was pretty good, and served its purpose).March 7, 2017 12:42 am at 12:42 am #1222805
Maybe yytz works for a dark chocolate companyMarch 7, 2017 1:44 am at 1:44 am #1222806yytzParticipant
LB: Good point about internal/external!
LU: You’re welcome! Chocolate does have caffeine (and the stimulant theobromine), so I personally would never eat it at night, but if you’re a coffee drinker you might be used to so much caffeine that the amount in a little chocolate wouldn’t disrupt sleep.
The funny thing is that men should eat a lot of chocolate too (as I’m sure many do), since men are at higher risk of a heart attack, which chocolate seems to help prevent.March 7, 2017 2:59 am at 2:59 am #1222807skripkaParticipant
I think both male and female smokers are equally insaneMarch 7, 2017 3:01 am at 3:01 am #1222808rebshidduchParticipant
That was going to be my question. Good question. Any answers?March 7, 2017 1:42 pm at 1:42 pm #1222809
Yytz: Maybe it’s just me but I noticed that men/guys prefer chocolate cakes and such desserts more so than women.
Or maybe they don’t have to say no as often because they naturally have more muscle mass and less body fat?March 7, 2017 4:03 pm at 4:03 pm #1222810
“LB: Good point about internal/external!”
maskim (I agree/+1March 7, 2017 6:54 pm at 6:54 pm #1222811I. M. ShluffinParticipant
I’m a staunch advocate of gender equality: I think women should have the same right to kill themselves as men have. Everyone is entitled to their own wrong opinions.March 8, 2017 3:52 pm at 3:52 pm #1222812frumnotyeshivishParticipant
“Socially acceptable.” Hmmm. To which society do you refer?
In America, the CDC successfully (for the most part) convinced the public that smoking is not “cool”.
In the US 17 percent of adult males and 13% of females currently smoke, per CDC.
In the Yeshivish world, women rarely smoked, even when rates among men were sky-high and health was not perceived to be detrimentally affected (per my incomplete knowledge of “Yeshivish social history”).
Citing statistics without context is an excellent way to be misleading.
Ergo, women are misleading.
#myargumentsbetterthanyoursMarch 8, 2017 4:02 pm at 4:02 pm #1222813
How do you react when you see a guy in a suit smoking outside his company? Would you still want to do business with him if you found out that he was the CEO?
Even if he is a dad?
What about a woman who is smoking in a tznius skirted suit? Would you want to do business with her? What if she was the CEO?
And if you found out that she was a mother would you feel the same way as a father smoking?
What if both this father and this mother (both married to separate nonsmokers) don’t smoke indoors and interact with their children for the same number of hours and affection.
—Does a smoking father not get more social slack than a smoking mother?March 8, 2017 4:38 pm at 4:38 pm #1222814
“Socially acceptable.” Hmmm. To which society do you refer?”
“Ergo, women are misleading.”
Any time, someone uses a phrase such as “socially acceptable”, they are obviously not referring to every society in every country since time began. They are clearly only referring to the society to which they belong.
Also, I’m not sure the word “women” would be the misleading word in any case. In our society, I think it would be unacceptable for any women to smoke.
My arguments are better than yours. But I don’t use hashtags because I heard (in the CR) that they are goyish. 🙂 So it’s “sheiv v’al taaseh” until I hear otherwise.March 9, 2017 1:29 am at 1:29 am #1222815from Long IslandParticipant
Sorry Guys; I guess I am much older than most of you. My generation of girls smoked – NEVER in PUBLIC – but they did, most seniors of my BY high school smoked. outside school, in our homes (Dad was often a smoker/pipe smoker)
Once they started families they stopped. but still some smoked in private. Today no one does that I know of.March 9, 2017 1:43 am at 1:43 am #1222816
“most seniors of my BY high school smoked.”
really? I’m surprised? Were they considered rebellious? What year or decade are we talking about?
You do write “NEVER in PUBLIC” so it sounds like it probably wasnt that acceptable.March 9, 2017 5:00 am at 5:00 am #1222817rebshidduchParticipant
Lilmod, maybe since it is accepted I will start smoking.March 9, 2017 5:05 am at 5:05 am #1222818
Are bochurim who smoke more open-minded about marrying a girl who smokes?March 9, 2017 5:18 am at 5:18 am #1222819
Rebshidduch – who said it’s accepted?
LB – probably less so, actually. I have a funny story about that, but I’m too tired, so it will have to wait.March 9, 2017 5:23 am at 5:23 am #1222820
LU: I love how you keep us in suspense with your stories, ever waiting for the next one 🙂
Sleep wellMarch 9, 2017 5:30 am at 5:30 am #1222821
🙂 okay, you convinced me.
So I was in a store in Monsey once, and I overheard two Chassidish men talking. One of them was telling the other about a mutual friend of theirs whose wife had been trying to get him to stop smoking. Finally, one day she said to him, “if you don’t stop smoking, I’m going to start.”
The next day he came home to find his wife smoking. He stopped immediately.March 9, 2017 5:31 am at 5:31 am #1222822
Leilah Tov!March 9, 2017 5:33 am at 5:33 am #1222823
That’s so genius!
Wow thanks for sharing LU 🙂
Such a good story and blessed outcome.
Leila tov ?March 9, 2017 5:38 am at 5:38 am #1222824
I wonder if that works with food.
If a woman eats vegetables and healthy and yet her husband doesn’t and he somehow lives off of M&M’s, challah, steak, salami, and potato chips (of course defying fairness by not gaining weight), oh and pizza and soda, would he start eating healthier and cut out the junk food if she decided that she from now on was going to eat exactly everything that he wold be eating?
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