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I am conducting a poll on human behaviour.
FOR THE MEN:
If you had a choice between a very reserved introvert whose looks you found “perfect”, and an extrovert who isn’t perfect-looking,which would you prefer?
FOR THE WOMEN:
If you had a choice between a handsome man who preened himself a lot,and expected you to do the same,and a very plain-looking man who was very sensitive to your feelings,which would you choose?
FOR BOTH;
WHICH MIDAH TOVAH WOULD AUTOMATICALLY MAKE SOMEONE BEAUTIFUL/HANDSOME IN YOUR EYES?
NOT FAIR. I started the Human Nature Experiment Project series!!! (do not look here, why threads change direction, what people discuss, how to add a thread..)
K I D D I N G !!!
Anyways it seems that you are, in fact, trying to answer all questions yourself, by way of wording. ???? ??? ??? ?????. Besides the last which you leave open, I surmise you’re alluding to ??? ???? which you so often stress. AM I WRONG??
I would choose the introvert. Although introverts may appear quiet or shy at first they are very sensitive, creative and intimate 🙂 In response to your last question there is no single middah tovah that would make someone beautiful in my eyes.. it’s all a package and a unified network of complex human personality that makes an overall impression. Indeed, Chazal and later Aristotle argue that virtues are unified, that its difficult to have one without the others..
Mentchlichkeit, and (real) ehrlichkeit above all!
a person who wants to grow
Since the question is about which Middah would make someone beautiful and not what the best or most important Middah is, I’d say that a happy person fits that bill.
4SURE the plain looking sensitive, and someone KIND
i would take someone not so good looking and kind and sensitive for sure but does that mean someone ugly looking?
I would go with the introvert and should have the middah of being genuine and sincere.
Eclipse – I am confident you realize there are so many more dynamics to this question (dont eb insulted) – however from my experience I have found this would be my choice knowing what I know today….
The introvert / extrovert toss up would depend on what your own personality is.
In my case, and A++ super-duper achiver, dance-in-the-middle-of-the-cirle type, would be meaningless to me (in fact, quite possibly a deal breaker), as I’m as B- as you can get.
As far as a male being overly preocuppied with his / his spouse looks, I’d venture a guess and say, its a match made in heaven, and they deserve each other (and lucky for the rest of us, that they’re out of circulation, so the rest of us are safe)
As for the prime middah? That would need to be one who makes every effort to do nice things for their partner. It could be a minor as buying the variety of shampoo the other likes, to as monumental as making a rack of lamb on a tuesday, just because.
I would go for the plain looking guy who was sensitive to my feelings + the midda of anavah.
@clockwork_kiwi, can you explain a little more about “Indeed, Chazal and later Aristotle argue that virtues are unified, that its difficult to have one without the others.”? I’m not always the best at reading comprehension & I’m not familiar with this.
I cant stand a man who is more worried about his appearance than I am about mine. Pretty to look at… not to live with.
Is sense of humor a midda?
Oh, I forgot- 100% pure honesty is very important too.
” I cant stand a man who is more worried about his appearance than I am about mine. “
Oooh, do I have a shlump for you:
* Fingerprints on his eyeglasses, (lopsided, of course)
* Tail of necktie is longer than the bib (and tucked into pants)
* Heels of shoes are worn down, (and one lace is open)
And the for the coup de grace…. he has a feather and pearl pin in his too narrow brimmed, faded non- Borsalino hat. whose brim is up…(but is down for casual outings)!
Want more details?
Why does masculine have to equal shlump?
I dont want an effeminate man who wears pants tighter than my tights (its an epidemic!) or has a chup more dramatic than Elvis’, with more hairspray.
Blue collar guy in a white collar job.
Got details?
“Blue collar guy in a white collar job”
Classic line. Really.
And you are right about the tight pants. I know a few who do, and its realy not pasedik. Luckily, my boys (and poppa) are not onto this fad.
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