Started Shiduchim & need help with Seminary Facts

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    I am 23.5, I’ve learned in Ner Yisroel from 9th – 12th then stayed for two year in BM. Then went to Israel for 3 years. While I was there I learned in the Mir and during the last year started some online college.

    Now I am back, Learn in the morning, and go to school at Touro at night. Going for a Business degree. So alls well BUT now I started going out and I get read people all the time. Its hard to know who will be right for me and it’s hard to understand what them MatchMakers are really saying. When guys are suggested to girls, they are researched to find out where they went to yeshiva. But I dont know nothing about seminaries!

    I was told that BJJ is very frum. I went out with a person from there and she was not such a frummy as much as she was yeshivish! This makes things a little difficult for me, I don’t have any sisters only 5 brothers! & my Mom hasn’t been to a seminary for 20+ years. G/D bless her.

    Anyway, I am more of a regular guy, not yeshivish, but very frum. I am career focused I know what i am going for. I don’t mind starting out for a zman in Isreal but wouldn’t mind keeping my schedule the way it is with sadarim and college. I am open to start out in learning but not more then a couple months becuase I see myself as a worker in the long run.

    Please somebody help me understand about the following Seminaries:

    1. Maachon Raaya (recently getting a couple of names from here)

    2. Darchei Bina (from what I heard, it makes me worry)

    3. Banos Chava (sounds okay, but maybe too JAPPY)

    Want to know, if students from these schools would intellectual fit with me.




    i dont know anything about those seminaries, but i do know something about seminary in general, and this applies to yeshivas too. dont focus so much on the seminary- its the PERSON that is important. every school has a name and a reputation, but there is obviously a mix of girls who goes to each school, so you really need to find out what kind of person she is, more than where she went to school.


    Don’t get hung up on schools or seminaries. It is not a very meaningful way to tell who is right for you. I found my wife on Frumster, you may want to give that a try as well.


    I agree with above posters.

    We had such a mix in my sem.

    I think it matters more how they see you. They might be summing you up based on your learning background and yeshivos, but that may not reflect the type of girl you want. I would ask those suggesting shidduchim to you what type of girl they see you with (and why) (meaning, why did they think of HER for you?) That may clue you in as to how they’re perceiving you.


    I hear thanks, its good points your making.

    So I should be open to people who went to whatever seminary…?

    Loyal Jew

    Research is the shadchen’s job, not the boy’s. There are things no boy can find out by himself: are there frumkeit issues away from the immediate family? Do they have problems with someone who is doing a degree? When you decide to return to learning, will they support? Etc. If you feel it necessary to do your own research, maybe it’s time to get your own shadchen.


    The whole idea of research is outrageous, and a waste of time and effort.

    The correct way to do it is the way businesses do it. You ask for the information you want, and then you put in the contract that if they made misrepresentations then you get remedies. That is what I did with my wife, and it worked perfectly.


    Hello Defrostings! Soo I usually don’t go on Yeshiva world and I usually don’t read the coffee room threads (thanks to touro’s endless amount of work!) But Hashgacha has it that I happened to see your post and saw that you are going for Business… by any chance are you taking Business Policy because I need the book for a case study… do you happen to have it an not be using it? It’s the book with I think a maze and a key… I don’t know the name because I only used it once! As for seminaries… I happened to have gone to one of the seminaries you listed so feel free to ask me about it… but in general, be careful with listening to people talk about seminaries..make sure it’s not someone who has something against someone who went there or against the actual seminary because you’ll end up hearing lashon hara and probably a lot of biased info that isn’t true…so be careful:) Additionally, yes it’s always good to get a feeling for the type of seminary the girl you’re going out with went to, but just because a girl went to a certain school doesn’t mean she’s the same type you heard the seminary is. So of course be careful if you hear something about a seminary that you don’t feel comfortable with, but check into the girl herself to see who SHE is, not what the seminary is! Hatzlacha in Touro and hatzlacha with shidduchim! Hope it goes very quickly for you! Hashem should give you clarity and make it ask painless as possible:)


    ummm…u pose as a guy in shidduchim here, but in another post ur asking about seminary in israel or america and the way you’ve worded ur question, sounds like a girl…If you wanna find out about seminaries, ask it out right….


    One time poster- your a flirt!


    wow I totally didn’t mean to sound like one! Guess it’s a good thing I stay away from Y.W threads…


    I cannot stand this. If someone wants to post questions about contradicting things such as asking about seminaries, and now shidduchim so what!? I hate how people get called out here, and embarrassed it is disgusting. Get a life this is a blog, an open forum, stop embarrassing people it is so upsetting.



    “Want to know, if students from these schools would intellectual fit with me.”

    So you want to know if the girls are religously on your level? Intellectually?

    Please Clarify.

    One time poster:

    “thanks to touro’s endless amount of work!”

    OMG. Thank you. I’m so sick and tired of people badmouthing ‘Camp Touro’. I’ll be graduating in 2 weeks iyh and lemme tell you- it was no walk in the park. The amount of assignments and tests have been out of control.

    *Stepping off soap box*


    As a generalization-

    1. Maachon Raaya- Dunno

    2. Darchei Bina (from what I heard, it makes me worry)- you are probably right

    3. Banos Chava-(sounds okay, but maybe too JAPPY)- spot on.


    Publicized negative speech about seminaries may count as lashon harah unless it is specifically said to the person who will benefit from the information. Similar to starting a thread asking people to give their opinion about a certain person.

    I hope no one takes offense.


    so why wake up a questionable thread that has long been buried?

    🍫Syag Lchochma

    SaysMe – I wish my brain worked like that! There are so many thing I can see that nobody else does (I mean diagnostically, NOT hallucinatory, thank you) and other things don’t occur to me at all. I’ll never get my detective badge 🙁

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