the demise of a normal sleeping schedule⚰️🛌🗓️

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Viewing 33 posts - 1 through 33 (of 33 total)
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  • #1672284
    english speaking
    Participant

    I feel like not so long ago (’80s), when I was growing up, everyone had a schedule for sleeping. They would go to sleep at a normal hour every day and get up at a normal hour every day.
    Nowadays, even parents with a few kids have erratic hours. They can go to sleep at 2 and get up at 9 or go to sleep at 11 and get up at 7….note the long sleep! When you’re not on a schedule, that’s what happens. And that causes people to get super tired during the day. That didn’t happen when I was growing up.
    I’m not saying everyone’s like this, but there are definitely a lot of people like this. Even working people who have to show up on time every day, either show up late, or come with their belt unbuckled and hair in curlers. (Figuratively speaking)
    What changed? I chap people are probably lazier nowadays, but fixing a normal schedule should be easy.
    What are your thoughts on the matter?

    #1672406
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    You are really showing your privilege as someone who can fall asleep voluntarily.

    #1672539
    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    High Schools also started later, people worked less hours.
    People used to care about their health more?
    Not sure.

    #1672675
    Gadolhadorah
    Participant

    English Speaking: You assert that “people are probably lazier nowadays” as the root cause of irregular sleeping patters. I would submit that the pressures of trying to deal with all the conflicting obligations families have today with davening, school, after-school activities, taking care of older-parents and many two working parents in some cases holding two jobs means crazy hours. I wouldn’t call this “laziness”.

    #1672702
    Sam Klein
    Participant

    Sleeping or drinking your morning coffee is not what gives you your strength for the day. Your strength comes directly from Hashem and its your corrupt human psychological mind that convinces you that since you had your coffee/sleep you feel stronger. Sure we all need to sleep and eat but No one can give you strength besides Hashem. We say every day Boruch hanosein…. Blessed is Hashem that gives us strength…. It all comes directly from Hashem

    Sure We all need to do our part in everything in life. But nobody can heal us besides Hashem not the doctor or the medicine etc….

    Stop depending on humans from rebbes to segulah etc… And go directly to Hashem from your heart. Hashem is waiting to help YOU but he first needs to hear you call out to him.
    Hashem loves his special children klal Yisroel and is waiting to return to us with his bais Hamikdosh but we first need to all yearn for it and so teshuva together as a loving nation so we can be deserving of hashems holy shchina.

    May we all do teshuva ASAP

    #1673014
    funnybone
    Participant

    Sam: dont denigrate a brocha from a tzaddik. It borders on apikorsus.

    #1673063
    Gadolhadorah
    Participant

    Sam….you seem to dismiss the reality that every on of us needs to do our own work in terms of taking care of physical well being, doing whatever we can to de-stress our lives and accept whatever brachos we may be fortunate to receive from tzadikim. Yes, the Ebeshter ultimately governs what happens in the world but to mindlessly dismiss personal responsibility and obligations is the real apikorsus.

    #1673077
    Lightbrite
    Participant

    On a side not so side note, today we work a LOT with screens. Screens that emit light. Light that adversely affects our circadian rhythms, in ways that telling our brains that night (when it is night) is basically day.

    So, this world is different than it was even 20 years ago.

    Oh, and fluorescent lighting!

    People can spend all day in school, work, kollel, cheder, and other places with fluorescent lighting, which also adversely impacts one’s brain’s ability to just turn off.

    Hashem is in charge, but that does not mean that these technological advances don’t impact us. Hashem needs us to also take our environments into perspective.

    #1673080
    Lightbrite
    Participant

    To maintain a more regular sleeping schedule, I have started taking melatonin and Benadryl regularly, under my doctor’s supervision.

    I thought that I was the only adult having trouble falling and staying asleep.

    However, lo and behold, it turns out that there are other adults who also take sleep aids. Granted, taking a sleeping aid does not come easily, or without risks. There are studies linking frequent antihistamine use and dementia. However, for right now, not sleeping puts me at risk for other problems. So, this is where I am in my life at this point.

    …I don’t know if everyone’s sleep patterns, needs, and habits remain consistent over one’s lifetime.

    #1673084
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    May we all do teshuva ASAP

    We’re waiting for you to lead by example.

    #1673091
    akuperma
    Participant

    The problem goes back to the invention of electric lights. Before them almost everyone went to sleep when it got dark out. Worldwide, it appears the sleep deprivation is a public health problem.

    #1673118
    Gadolhadorah
    Participant

    As Akuperma notes, blame it all on Edison….in the alte heim, once it was dark, everyone when to sleep reasonably soon thereafter because there was no CR to post in, and you had to be up at 4:30 to 5:00 am to either daven vasikim, milk-the-cows, or both. Overall, technology has vastly improved the quality of our lives is most but not all areas. LB’s excellent posting above explains the negatives in re sleep.

    #1673110
    Joseph
    Participant

    AKuperman: Would you, therefore, agree with me that it is best for society to bring back the candlestick makers and disable the electrical grid?

    #1673108
    Sam Klein
    Participant

    DY then follow my lead I just finished a full fast day on behalf of klal Yisroel and will be doing it again tomorrow for all the horrific tragedies that klal Yisroel is being hit with cause we sadly remain living in denial and have still not woken up to start doing international teshuva as a loving nation together.

    So join me in a taanis tomorrow to show Hashem how much we feel our brothers suffering they are going through
    Every day I fast goes until 72 minutes after sunset (longer then a public fast day) not 45 or 50 minutes after sunset

    Let us show Hashem how much we are begging for mashiach

    #1673135
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    No, no, I mean real teshuvah, not making yourself feel like a tzaddik teshuvah.

    #1673151
    chasid
    Participant

    I’m not sure which planet you live on, but there are no adults that I know that have these kind of erratic sleeping schedules. I am also a product of 80s childhood, and I have a very regular sleep schedule. so do most of the adults that I know in fact I can’t even think of one person that I’m aware of that gets up at 9 in the morning ever.

    #1673196
    Sam Klein
    Participant

    DY

    Hashem is not waiting for each person’s personal teshuva for their sins, that’s set aside daily in our davening and a special day made just for teshuva called yom Kippur.

    HASHEM IS WAITING for klal Yisroel teshuva as a nation-not each person separately-of bein Adam l’chaveiro and achdus-unity-how can we expect mashiach to come when the sinas chinam (baseless hatred) today is worse then the days of the second bais Hamikdosh that was destroyed because of it?

    We need to return to Hashem as one loving nation together on all levels-from frum to Frei to chassidish etc…-and do teshuva as a loving nation together. Yom Kippur is a day for personal repentance of sins. Now Hashem is waiting for public teshuva not personal.

    May we all wake up soon to teshuva ASAP

    #1673201
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    That’s a total copout. You’re trying to get out of doing teshuvah by saying it’s klal Yisroel’s problem, not yours.

    Do teshuvah yourself, then worry about the rest of us.

    #1673283
    Sam Klein
    Participant

    Dy

    Why don’t we sit down on the floor and say tikkun chatzos on behalf of the destruction of the bais Hamikdosh and in a zchus for it to be rebuilt. In the East coast people are now approximately finishing saying it since chatzos while in the Midwest they are now starting to say it. Its never too late until morning and you don’t need to be a Gadol Hador to say it.

    Nosei b’ol (feeling the pain of our brothers) is a very important thing to show Hashem before Mashiach can come. We need to show Hashem our love and feeling for one another.

    #1673634
    Amil Zola
    Participant

    Englishspeaking, perhaps you should concern yourself with issues that impact you. My sleep schedule is mine, it suits my life and lifestyle. Years ago it was determined by my work schedule. If someone can keep their job after repeatedly arriving an hour late what concern of it is yours? Sure if you are depending on them taking their shift before you leave well that’s an issue to take up with management. The science of sleep has taught us many things since you were growing up in the 80s. We’ve learned that biologically teens have different sleep schedules, ergo public schools being responsive and delaying start times. We’ve also learned that parents ‘sleep training’ children can have long term impacts on how they sleep as adults.

    Sometimes it’s good to take a step back and acknowledge the things you can control and the things you can’t. It may help you to sleep better.

    #1674019
    Reb Eliezer
    Participant

    Think of איזהו עשיר השמח בחלקו the one is rich who is happy with what he has, so don’t worry about things you cannot do anything about and you will sleep better.

    #1674017
    Ex-CTLawyer
    Participant

    I’m a child of the 1950s not the 80s.
    Television went off the air at 11:30 after the newscast. There weren’t 24 hour video diversions and personal computers to distract you and keep you up late.
    Since my teen years I go to sleep at 1am (meaning turn off the light after I may have been reading in bed) and I wake automatically at 5am. I don’t use an alarm clock, I have an internal clock.
    There are no electric or electronic devices ion my bedroom to disturb sleep. This means nothing is plugged in which has colored lights showing it is charged, charging, synced to wifi, etc. My cell phone is on my desk in my home office, it does not come to the bedroom. The days of a baby monitor are gone. no noises to wake us during the night. I let the dogs out at midnight and again at 5:10.

    I also drink coffee top relax at night, the caffeine does not keep me up, Mrc. CTL cannot drink caffeine after 3PM if she wants a good night sleep.

    When the grandchildren are here for the summer we have set sleep times. Under 5, 7:30pm, 5-8, 8:30 pm, 8-13, 9pm, Teenagers 10:30pm and everyone up by 7:30, 8am minyan in the house, 8:45 breakfast.

    #1674479
    Participant
    Participant

    I normally get about 6 hrs. or so, basically going to sleep and waking up at the same time, but very often I get so extremely tired like suddenly in middle of the afternoon. Did that happen in the ’80s?

    #1674509
    Joseph
    Participant

    CTL, how do you manage on 4 hours/night of sleep? (Especially as a teenager!) Is that seven days a week or do you make up for lost sleep on weekends? You don’t experience tiredness some days of the week?

    #1674689
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    Some people just naturally need less sleep.

    #1675708
    Ex-CTLawyer
    Participant

    @Joseph
    I manage well on 4 hours per night. My parents had similar sleep patterns as do my brothers. My elder sister requires 7 hours.
    The 4 hours is an every night thing. When I was younger I could skip a night’s sleep each week without it affecting me, but since about the age of 50, I need to sleep every night.

    I always found the hour of 5:15-6:15 to be ‘my time’ and very productive, no interruptions.

    #1675725
    Joseph
    Participant

    CTL, are you sure you’re a mere mortal?!

    #1675771
    WinnieThePooh
    Participant

    Of course not, Joseph. He also cooks, does laundry and mows his own lawn, runs a highly successful law firm, serves on his local government, and regularly hosts his entire extended family. What mere mortal does all that?

    #1675806
    Joseph
    Participant

    Winnie, and the craziest part is despite that grueling schedule he has a load of time for us in the Coffee Room!

    Do you think he even sleeps altogether? I suspect he’s being modest when he says he sleeps for four hours.

    #1675886
    DISCOVERHASHEM
    Participant

    CTLAWYER I admire you, you sound so cool

    #1676771
    daascochmabinah
    Participant

    I think a lot of it has to do with how fast paced our world is today, & the hot button topic of technology. In today’s world it doesn’t matter if you’re a parent, working professional, or Talmid chochom shteiging away in the Beis. The fact of the matter is, there’s always s/t going on & everyone wants to be a part of it. This is coming from the perspective of a 21 y/o, but I think it still holds true. The internet is also a big part of this imo, everyone wants to see what everyone is up to, social media is one of the biggest time-sucks of all. Before I deleted my social media accounts, I’d find myself in bed at 10:30 stalking all the Jewish bloggers until easily 2 AM. The internet/social media also creates a certain type of anxiety which I know definitely keeps me up at night. I just think we live in a society that as people, we care less about ourselves, and more about others, in-turn not doing what we need for ourselves.

    #1676791
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    You Internet-insomniacs are so cute.

    #1676803
    Ex-CTLawyer
    Participant

    @WTP
    I can assure you that I am mortal. But no one who has met me or seen me would call me ‘mere’ (smallest or slightest).
    It is now 11:05 am. I got up at 5 and let the dogs out. I took the carcass from Friday night’s turkey and put it in a pot with freshly chopped veg and spices and water and set it to boil for soup. I through a load of wash in. At 6:45 I turned the pot down to the lowest setting to simmer, moved the wash into the dryer and left for minyan. After minyan, I learned for 45 minutes and then came home. I turned off the soup, removed the carcass from the pot and placed the covered pot on my patio table to cool (so I could skim the fat off later and serve the soup for supper tonight).
    I then made breakfast for Mrs. CTL and myself. At 10:45 I had a scheduled teleconference with a client and his accountant for 15 minutes. I’ll work on their request in the office tomorrow.

    I’m spending a little diversion time in the CR and at noon I’m taking my 12 year old grandson to the local middle school for open rec basketball

    About 3PM I’ll feed the dogs.
    I’ll put supper in the oven about 4:30pm, tonight it’s easy …Turkey pot pies made with leftover turkey from Friday Night.
    While it bakes, I’ll go to mincha,
    The grandchildren are coming for supper, after supper Mrs. CTL and I will enjoy the kids while their parents clean up, do the dishes, etc.
    Around 9PM, when it quiets down, I’ll get on my treadmill and read while I walk for about 45 minutes.

    With planning I’ll get a lot in today. Yesterday was my day of rest

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