"Wearing Perfume"

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  • #599192
    bein_hasdorim
    Participant

    Do you as a woman wear perfume? Do you as a guy wear cologne?

    If no, why not? Is it Assur or Mutar?

    I understand it is problematic for a man to take pleasure in the

    perfumed scent of a strange woman, not his own wife.

    However, a man isn’t really supposed to get that close to strange

    woman anyhow. Perfume or Cologne worn properly is not supposed to

    make everyone in the vicinity turn around, start sniffing or

    sneezing. It is supposed to ber noticed only by someone who gets

    real close to you. So what’s the problem?

    #814195

    otherwise it’s nice to smell nice and there is nothing wrong with doing so as long as you don’t overload yourself, to the extent that you can be smelled from half way accross the room..

    #814196
    shlishi
    Member

    Since, as bein_hasdorim points out, it is only supposed to be noticed by her husband, why would she wear it outside the home in the first place? (Or why would an unmarried girl wear it altogether.)

    #814197
    bein_hasdorim
    Participant

    [Mods; I guess you didn’t get my request to fix my typos]

    [can you change on top “If no” to “if not” and “to ber” to “to be” thanks]

    #814198
    am yisrael chai
    Participant

    I would imagine some women would say perfume is a chiyuv during a 3 day yom tov…

    #814199
    tryinghard
    Member

    “Perfume or Cologne worn properly is not supposed to

    make everyone in the vicinity turn around,-Well somehow it does. start sniffing or

    sneezing-Right. Unfortunately, many ppl can use lessons on how to properly apply it.”

    Guess you’re a man (bein_hasdorim). A man usually likes perfume on his wife…. Ppl w/o a wife, may like it on your wife. At times you don’t have to go that close to smell it…

    #814200
    WIY
    Member

    If people 5 feet away from you can smell it you are wearing too much!

    #814201
    kylbdnr
    Member

    BTW it’s usually teachers who wear the yucky perfume u smell miles down…lol

    #814202
    Stamper
    Member

    I think it’s pretty obvious perfume for a man (or cologne or whatever it’s called) is assur. For a married woman, its muttar at home, not when her husband is away and she is shopping or when she goes to work.

    #814203
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    I think it’s pretty obvious perfume for a man (or cologne or whatever it’s called) is assur.

    If it was obvious, you wouldn’t have to say so. You would just say it is assur, and cite to a source.

    #814204
    Toi
    Participant

    i understood from my rabbeim that the reason men dont generally wear cologne is that it usually smells like week old pizza.

    #814205
    golden mom
    Member

    i so have a problem with women wearinf perfume i learned its assur to attract other men then u shouldnt wear outside

    i also learned that at certain times it assur for ur husband to smell it on u or even on ur clothes (even when u r not wearing it) so then when can u wear it for 2 wks and only @ HOME??????? dont get it

    #814206
    mytake
    Member

    As a single girl,(who is madly in love with perfume!) I wear perfume at home only. Even though there are some perfumes that are supposed to be subtle enough that a passerby wouldn’t smell it, I’ve noticed that I smell lots of women’s perfume in public areas so I personally don’t wear any outdoors. (I do make exceptions for girls-only events, though!)

    #814207
    yepyep
    Member

    That’s correct, golden mom. Only for those two weeks. Some women like wearing perfume for themselves – not necessarily to attract attention. That being the case, they can wear outside the home – something with a soft scent.

    #814208
    ronrsr
    Member

    The scent should not precede you into a room nor remain in the room after you’ve left.

    #814209
    Abe Cohen
    Participant

    Since a woman shouldn’t wear perfume outside the home, why do some wear them to weddings?

    #814210
    twisted
    Participant

    I have low level upper respiratory inflamation on a regular basis, and I am very sensitive to smoke, volatiles and perfume. The latter generally smells like bug spray to me. When someone passes by and emits a three meter cloud of lingering air pollution it is just plain offensive.

    #814211

    I believe that the origin of applying scents to people (perfume, cologne, incense, etc.)was to cover the smell of unwashed human bodies, both male and female. During the middle ages in Europe, bathing was considered evil. However, so was the smell, so perfume was applied to the person and his or her clothes.

    #814212
    Abe Cohen
    Participant

    RK: The gemorah talks about perfume.

    #814213
    a mamin
    Participant

    My take: I give you a lot of credit! You certainly are doing the right thing!!

    #814215
    apushatayid
    Participant

    “So what’s the problem?”

    You are spending too much time around women?

    #814216
    bpt
    Participant

    Ah, cologne. Back in the days (the 80s) anyone who was on the ball wore cologne. Who here remembers Drakar Noir, Polo (in the green bottle), Grey Flannel (Geofrey Beene, I think)?

    No comment on women. Sorry, outta my leauge.

    #814217
    golden mom
    Member

    anyone who wears perfume just in the house it lingers on your clothes so dont think when u go out u dont smell from it

    #814218
    kapusta
    Participant

    No comment on women. Sorry, outta my leauge.

    How about nail polish?

    *kapusta*

    #814219

    bpt, you had me rolling! my dad wears polo and personally its my fave for guys

    and i wear perfume most days. but technically its a body spray so teh scent is lighter. but for shabbos i wear real stuff. is it really so bad if i like to smell nice?

    #814220
    tweety
    Member

    Wearing perfume is not usser if u wear in your house and fremda men don’t smell it. The second a man smelled it even in your house u were oiver. Perfume should only be worn to pleasure your husband not yourself!

    #814222
    golden mom
    Member

    nail polish is a totally diffrent parsha

    #814223
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    Perfume should only be worn to pleasure your husband not yourself!

    That is not part of my religion.

    Source please?

    #814224
    golden mom
    Member

    tweety i dont think the women is ouer i think it is the man

    and the same goes for ur husband he is ouer also if he is not supposed to smell u ..

    #814225
    golden mom
    Member

    and by the way i could be wrong dont go one handy but i think the halacha is in hilchos bas yisroel

    #814226
    Stamper
    Member

    golden mom: If you cause someone to be oiver, you are putting a “stumbling block” in front of them, which is assur for you to do. Even if you tell yourself you are only putting it on for yourself, you are still being ???? ???? every time you pass a man in the street who can smell it.

    #814227
    kapusta
    Participant

    nail polish is a totally diffrent parsha

    You’re right. I should have put something after that line to show that I was kidding. If you read some threads, you’ll notice nail polish seems to be a favorite joke topic of bpt.

    *kapusta*

    #814228
    mewho
    Participant

    perfume is not tzniusdik.

    the smell makes people get attention from strangers.

    if someone smells a nice scent they will look to see where the smell is coming from.

    it is an attention grabber.

    it should not be permitted.

    #814229
    LITOVA
    Member

    I wear perfume, just a little, for myself. I dont see anything wrong with that.IS THERE anything wrong with wearing perfume on a date?

    #814230
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    IS THERE anything wrong with wearing perfume on a date?

    You definitely should. Nothing wrong with it.

    Mods: Why is this in the controversial topics forum? There is absolutely nobody normal who has any issue with perfume when used normally.

    #814232
    Sam2
    Participant

    Why is there an obsession with inventing Issurim nowadays? If wearing perfume was Assur then the Poskim would have said so.

    #814233

    Is there an issue with wearing a “scent” that is marketed towards both genders like Calven Klein One? Since the scent is designed to be gender neutral?

    #814234
    golden mom
    Member

    thy did look it up

    #814235
    FL613
    Member

    People should be considerate of others when wearing perfume in public. There are many people who are very sensitive (allergic) to perfume. I get headaches and dizzy when I am exposed to a strong scented perfume.

    #814236
    apushatayid
    Participant

    “perfume is not tzniusdik.

    the smell makes people get attention from strangers.”

    So does the odor caused when one does not bathe for a week. Perhaps we should institute that women bathe daily on grounds that it is untsniusdik otherwise?

    #814238
    WIY
    Member

    Would someone quote a source instead of opinion?

    #814239
    Sam2
    Participant

    WIY: Of course they wouldn’t. It doesn’t exist.

    #814240
    real-brisker
    Member

    WIY – There is something called common sense.

    #814241
    Stamper
    Member

    I mentioned ???? ???? above. In Even HaEzer, the Shulchan Aruch says it is forbidden for a man to smell a woman’s perfume. Also possibly related, Shabbos 62b says one reason for the destruction of the Beis Hamikdash was too much cosmetics, and that a women should care about her appearance for the purposes of not being repulsive to her husband. In the Shevet HaLevi there is a teshuva saying it is incorrect for a woman to dress up when going outside rather than when at home with her husband, and that if a woman puts a great effort into being noticed by strangers, this is reminiscent of the sins of the daughters of Yerushalayim at the time of the destruction.

    #814242
    yid.period
    Member

    1) It is prohibited for a male to [intentionally] smell the perfume that is on a [forbidden] female. (Shulchan Aruch Even HaEzer Siman 21:1. See also Mishna Berura Siman 217:17)

    According to some Rishonim this is a biblical prohibition. (See Rambam Pirush Hamishnayos Sanhedrin Perek 7 on Mishna on 54a and Sefer Chareidim Perek 28 quoting the Tashbatz. They say that the prohibition of “Lo Tin’af” is also read “Lo Tehene L’Af, do not have pleasure with your nose”. See also Sefer Chareidim perek 15 that there is an additional prohibition of “Lo Tikrevu L’Galos Ervah” as anything that causes one to get closer to transgressing Arayos is biblically prohibited.)

    2) Perfume on a girl below the age of twelve, according to some Poskim it may be smelled while others are stringent and disallow this as well. (See Mogen Avrohom Siman 217:10 and Mishna Berura S”K 16)

    Taken from halachafortoday.com

    Some Poskim even prohibit a man from smelling his wife’s perfume on her when she is a Nidah. (Mishna Berura ibid.)

    #814243
    mdd
    Member

    Popa bar Abba, what is the purpose of wearing perfume on a date? The man is not allowed to smell it as she is an erva.

    #814244
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    Popa bar Abba, what is the purpose of wearing perfume on a date? The man is not allowed to smell it as she is an erva.

    A man is generally not allowed to gaze at any part of any erva woman for pleasure.

    So what is the point of her dressing up at all? Or even going on the date at all?

    I don’t know. But she should dress up, and she should wear perfume. I don’t know the sources on this, but I know this is what my rebbeim say.

    So don’t trust me, ask your rav.

    #814245
    Sam2
    Participant

    There is a difference between intentionally smelling for pleasure and noticing a light, good smell from a perfume. Just like there is a difference between staring at a woman for pleasure and seeing her. Most people do not intentionally never look at a girl they are dating. I don’t see the distinction between that and perfume, so long as it’s not overdone.

    #814246
    shlishi
    Member

    popa: Your first comment here chastised a poster for not citing a source. Now when sources are cited, you admit you cannot counter it but that you were taught otherwise (without a source)?

    Also, even putting the point you said you were taught (which would only be applicable to a girl going on a date) aside, married women and unmarried women not on a date would be prohibited from going in public with perfume, based on the provided sources, would you not agree?

    #814247
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    popa: Your first comment here chastised a poster for not citing a source. Now when sources are cited, you admit you cannot counter it but that you were taught otherwise (without a source)?

    I have asked for sources on this thread where posters have invented issurim without even saying they heard it from anyone reliable- just from their boich.

    The source presented that perfume should be assur on a date was not a direct proof, since it is not speaking about dates.

    Therefore, I distinguished that on dates we clearly allow things we do not usually, since we allow them to speak to each other look at each other and create a relationship.

    Then, I stated that I do not know why we allow more on dates.

    Then, I stated that it is nevertheless true, as I know from my rebbeim. And concluded that one should ask their rav.

    I don’t know what is bothering you about that.

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