What if you thought you knew…

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    What if you thought you knew a close friend of yours might have a medical condition but its not the type to discuss it with him/her. How do you find a way to let them know without causing any frusttartion, awkwardness or discomfort?

    Another name

    Be general, you can say (or email or text) something along the lines of “I hope you are doing well, I just wanted to let you know that no matter what, I’m here for you…” That way, you are leaving your friend an opening, if she is open to opening to you, and at the very least she’ll know you care.

    (As with everything in life), much hatzlacha and siyata dishmaya!


    ANYTHING that you might suspect….but which your friend has chosen to not yet share with you should not be brought up by you until they want to share that with you.

    people are entitled to privacy and to not share everything with friends. In other words its nobody’s business if they have something. If they want you to know they will tell you.


    Is this a medical condition from birth, or recently developed? Are you asking because you think it will really help your friend if they know someone else knows, or because you just want them to know you figured it out?

    A few years ago, I became friendly with a coworker and suspected she had a somewhat rare congenital condition–nothing I could have done anything about, but was curious to know how she handled it. But it wasn’t the kind of thing you could just say, hey, do you have such-and-such? Even though that was what I was itching to do. B”H i controlled myself. She was kind of in denial about it. Eventually, after a while, when we had become pretty close friends, she opened up about it herself, which seemed to help her deal with it.

    Given time and space and friendship, if your friend wants to tell you, maybe s/he will.


    ok, so the situation is like his.

    Its not “the @ birth” kind of condition, i think its something that may have developed.

    What happen was, a friend of mine is in the medical field (lets call her B) “B” and I were at an event where she met my friend “C” in passing, and noticed some symptoms of a condition that is not always so common, not always always noticed and easily looked at as normal.

    For example: a person l’a who has diabetes sometimes gives off a fruity smell …one can think its perfume or what not- when really its a sign of a condition.

    Here, I dont think my friend “C” knows that she could possibly have this condition my friend “B’ explained to me, and its treatable with a simple procedure, but its NOT the type to walk up to her and say, listen i noticed XYZ maybe we can go and check it out together…and sending her an email like “whatever happens, you know im there for you” would come off rather strange – and she aint stupid- she’d be like, what? whats goin on?

    so, on one hand I want to let her be aware of this condition, and she’ll probably check it out (if she has it im certain she’ll take care of it) and the other I dont want it to dampen our friendship.

    Please help me.


    You mean your friend might not even be aware of this condition? Then the only way to help her figure it out is either by anonymous email or mention to her how it’s important to go for a yearly checkup. Hopefully the doctor will notice it if its actually something.



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