April 19, 2016 4:45 pm at 4:45 pm #617598OkialeMember
I’m 15 y/o raised as a conservative Jew but I’m making the transition to Orthodoxy. I’m currently reading the chofetz Chaim and kitzur shulchan aruch, any other suggestions?April 19, 2016 5:59 pm at 5:59 pm #1149073apushatayidParticipant
find an Orthodox Rabbi to guide you.April 19, 2016 9:14 pm at 9:14 pm #1149074ezrahoersterParticipant
Make sure you’re Jewish according to Orthodox standards meaning you’ll need to be converted by a Orthodox Beis Din if your mother isn’t Jewish according to Orthodox standards.April 20, 2016 4:37 am at 4:37 am #1149075Mashiach AgentMember
Take it slowly step by step. No rush to get all confused with all the laws in one shot.
May Hashem be with you and answer all the needs you ask forApril 20, 2016 10:48 am at 10:48 am #1149076PoshLondonMember
I agree with apushatayid! You need someone to help you. Hatzloche!April 20, 2016 1:58 pm at 1:58 pm #1149077yytzParticipant
May you be successful! As others have said, go at your own pace, so you don’t get burnt out. It takes time to become a ba’al teshuvah, especially when you’re living with your parents.
Studying the Kitzur can be a little overwhelming and misleading, since it doesn’t always match current practice and you might get the impression that it’s extremely difficult and complicated to be observant on a daily basis, while in reality it’s not hard once you’re used to, as you’ll see once you spend time around frum Jews. That’s not to say you shouldn’t study it. Just be careful not to get overwhelmed.
There are plenty of good things to read on websites like Chabad.org, Aish.com, and Simpletoremember.com.
As for books, there are a ton of good ones out there. I enjoy books by Rav Hirsch such as 19 Letters or Horeb, though you might find them a bit difficult to read in currently-available translations. Easily readable translations of chassidic sefarim such as the works of Rebbe Nachman of Breslov (one of my favorites, though I’m not exactly chassidic) are available to read online for free at sites like Azamra. In any case, hatzalacha with your transition!April 20, 2016 2:46 pm at 2:46 pm #1149078mw13Participant
If you’re looking for Seforim, the Mesilas Yesharim (available with an English translation at any Judaica store or online) is a great one to start with.
But as others have pointed out, this is a journey that can become difficult and confusing if attempted alone. Try reaching out to a local Orthodox Rabbi who will be able to guide you along, and who will be able to give advice tailor-fit for your specific situation.
In the interm, there are several great websites that can help you more about Orthodox Judaism, among them aish.com (especially their Judaism 101 section) jewishpathways.com.
May Hashem grant you much hatlocha on your path, and don’t hesitate to ask anything else here!April 20, 2016 4:27 pm at 4:27 pm #1149079Trust 789MemberApril 20, 2016 4:53 pm at 4:53 pm #1149080Geordie613Participant
Just on the previous post (mw13), the first time you learn messilas yesharim should be with a Rebbe or guide.
If you have a local orthodox shul, approach the Rabbi and ask to study with him.
Well done, you have started on an amazing journey to reclaim your true heritage. Hatzlacha Rabba.April 25, 2016 9:16 pm at 9:16 pm #1149081sm29Participant
That’s really great of you to take this step. Eventhough it’s difficult at first, you are doing good for your soul. Hahem appreciates every effort. Remember, if you have setbacks, that’s okay, just get up and continue. All the best –April 26, 2016 1:45 am at 1:45 am #1149082oomisParticipant
Good advice so far. Take it slowly and make it really part of you. DO NOT disrespect your parents in your process. Always approach them in a responsible and loving manner. If they want to do something which you believe or actually know to be wrong (desecrate Shabbos, eat something from an objectively questionable hechsher), then refrain from doing the same or from eating it, but don’t for example, start tearing around the kitchen, throwing food out. You have no idea how powerful YOUR influence can be on them, when they see that the child whom they love has made positive, meaningful changes spiritually, but is still their loving child. Some baalei teshuva develop an unbecoming arrogance about being more religiously observant than their parents, and if ends up causing an unintended chillul Hashem.April 26, 2016 1:35 pm at 1:35 pm #1149083lesschumrasParticipant
Reading this blog without a firm foundation can be very detrimental.April 26, 2016 1:46 pm at 1:46 pm #1149084zahavasdadParticipant
Some baalei teshuva develop an unbecoming arrogance about being more religiously observant than their parents, and if ends up causing an unintended chillul Hashem.
A family member runs a halacha hotline and they told me the #1 Shaala they get is children who are more frummer than their parents and when they go home to the parents for PesachApril 26, 2016 2:59 pm at 2:59 pm #1149085
…and try to spend as least time as possible on the internet that may take away precious time that can be used for personal growth.As for myself, i turn on the computer in the morning to YWN to check out the news and then within 15 minutes the computer is shut for the day. In the evening may download shiurim(lectures) from sites as learn torah or torah anytime that will listen to on my MP3 player at a later time.April 26, 2016 3:09 pm at 3:09 pm #1149086oomisParticipant
I know it from friends who ARE frum, but their son became UBER-Yeshivish, for want of a better expression (really way beyond what most of us think of us Yeshivish), and it has really harmed the family dynamic because of his gaivehdik intolerance of what most people on this blog would consider to be normal behavior in a frum household. I would give an example, but there might be people on this site who know the family and would recognize my description of them.
The bottom line, you want to be more observant, that is so amazing. Just don’t change your relationship with your family in an obnoxious way. People who have been reading my posts for some years, know that I am married to a Baal Teshuvah, a very earnest, ehrliche, and fine man, who was that way BEFORE he ever became frum. That is largely due to his wonderful parents, O”H, who were loving, baalei chessed in every way, and could have taught ALL of us the proper way to act bein adam l’chaveiro. When my husband became frum, he did it little by little, taking on new halachos each time, learning what was proper and what was not. He never once dissed his family, and they took great pride in him becoming more religious, though they themselves were not. They made an extra effort when we came over (once a week with the kids) to have only kosher food and snacks in the house, plenty of unopened paper goods, and never questioned when we felt we could not eat something, i.e. my father-in-law bought a snack with a hechsher that we do not rely upon. But that is because we never made a big deal of it. We thanked him VERY much for going to the trouble of looking for things we could have, but also told him that we are only comfortable eating store products with an OU, OK, or Chof-K, but not the one he found with a different symbol. It makes a big difference, and great Kiddush Hashem, to show our non-religious family, co-workers, neighbors, that being frum doesn’t make us high and mighty. That is for Hashem to judge.April 26, 2016 7:31 pm at 7:31 pm #1149087dovrosenbaumParticipant
You’re very young still.
If you live in an area with NCSY, get involved. They have great rabbis who will help guide you properly.
Don’t take on too much at once. I’d say to start incorporating more into your life gradually. NCSY or your local Chabad can get you a pair of tefillin. Pray with them every morning, except shabbos and yom tov. Begin to learn Hebrew reading, and get some transliterated materials to help learn the prayers in the interim. Keep reading and listening to shiurim and lectures. Keep doing good deeds and incorporate kashrus and shabbos into your life, and you will see great blessings.
When the time comes, apply to colleges with a strong Jewish presence, kosher food, JLIC, etc. Maybe take a year off and learn in yeshiva after you finish high school.
Best of Luck!April 27, 2016 2:12 am at 2:12 am #1149088yehudayonaParticipant
Dov, you’re assuming the OP is male.April 27, 2016 2:23 am at 2:23 am #1149089☢️ 🚭 ☣️ Rand0m3x 🧠🕴️🎲Participant
He’s asked about attending tishen.April 27, 2016 3:10 am at 3:10 am #1149090OkialeMember
Dov, I already have tefillin and have a fairly good knowledge of basic Judaism and halakha in general, but thanks anyways. Yehuda, I am a male
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