When to start shidduchim

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  • #1516594

    Videoman
    Participant

    Hi,
    What are the usual requirements for a bochur to start shidduchim?
    How does one know if they’re ready?
    If a bochur is working, how much should he be making before starting?

    All sound advice is appreciated.

    #1516612

    DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    What are the usual requirements for a bochur to start shidduchim?

    He needs someone to go out with

    How does one know if they’re ready?

    Rule of thumb: old enough to post on the CR, old enough to get married

    If a bochur is working, how much should he be making before starting?

    $20 an hour

    All sound advice is appreciated.

    Hatzlacha getting some

    #1516629

    Joseph
    Participant

    Chazal answer this question:

    Shemona Esre L’Chuppa.

    #1516666

    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    @DaasYochid ☕

    Rule of thumb: old enough to post on the CR, old enough to get married

    Disagree. I was posting here before I was in high school, definitely NOT ready for shidduchim.

    How does one know if they’re ready?

    Are you ready to financially support a family for the rest of your life? Are you ready to have kids? Are you ready to educate kids and give them chinuch?

    #1516645

    Takes2-2tango
    Participant

    Joseph . U suggested in another thread regarding polygamy to counter the shidfich crisis. How old should one be to consider it , in your opinion?

    #1516687

    morahmom
    Participant

    If you’re posting this question to the coffee room, you’re not ready.
    Find a rebbe/mentor that you’re comfortable with who knows you.
    Hatzlacha rabbah!!

    #1516692

    Joseph
    Participant

    Takes2: In NY the legal age to marry is 16.

    #1516902

    Midwest2
    Participant

    You have to talk it over with someone who knows you personally. Some people are ready at 20, some are never ready. Family and parents are another factor to consider.

    If you don’t have a rav or rosh yeshiva you can talk with, call NEFESH and get a professional. Marriage is the most important decision you’ll make in your life. And the problem is that if you decide wrong, it’s not just your own life you’re messing up, it’s also the life of the person you marry and any kids you may have.

    Play it safe. Talk to someone who knows you or will get to know you and your situation well. Anonymous advice on the CR isn’t the best way to go about it.

    #1516909

    Videoman
    Participant

    Yes, obviously what one reads online/here needs to be taken with a grain (or a truckload sometimes) of salt.
    Yes, I agree that I’m not making this decision solely based off of the responses.

    I am curious to know what the general opinions are, that’s all.

Viewing 9 posts - 1 through 9 (of 9 total)
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