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My oldest son is in 8th grade and Baruch Hashem was accepted to two amazing mesivtas in Lakewood. Which one should we send him to? We have a big dilemma because he really wants to go to one since it has a name as being a top place. Yet it is really big in size so were not sure how he would do there. We as parents like the fact that the other one is smaller and more homey. What should we do? Any advice would be appreciated.
Smaller isn’t always better.
Keep him as close to home as possible. Dorming out of town is no longer like they used to be !
You should start by not taking guidance from a forum of anonymous online posters. Hatzlocha!
If you are looking for something homey, keep him at home. If you are looking for a yeshiva, send him to the best. Afraid he’ll be homesick? Call him three times a day and that will make sure he will be. Otherwise, let him grow up. Your job is done, he’s ready to be a yeshiva bochur.
Do what is best for your son, regardless of the name. Look at the quality of the education, of the rabbonim, or the chevra and your son. Where is he most likely to come out the best person, the best Jew? Does he thrive more from intimacy of small chevra, or being challenged by a higher level of learning? Either way, not a coffee room decision.
Do not rely on something being a “top place” as being a good fit for your son. Speak with his rebbeim and rebbeim from both Yeshivos. Also speak with current talmidim at both places.
Kids do better in places they want to attend.
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