Why all Tznius Asifas are doomed to fail unless there's consequences

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    So there was another Asifa. This time in Boro Park. Will it do anything about the epidemic of Pritzus? I doubt it. Here’s why: first of all, most of these Asifas, since they’re voluntary, tend to be attended by those interested and mostly complying already. Anotherwards the speakers are preaching to the choir. Those who the Asifa is for rarely attend.

    Number two and this is my main point. There are no social consequences! So even if someone gets the message, they can just shrug it off. They figure they’ll square it with Hashem eventually. In the mean time they’ll dress as they please. And no one will tell them a word.

    The Asifa used to work years ago when people had more Yiras Shomayim. They just needed to hear that something was forbidden and they listened. But today? In America’s unprecedented Hefkerus, where society is pushing the limits every day more and more, this infiltrates the Jewish community as well.

    And that’s why you can walk in the, supposedly, most Frum neighborhoods, and you see people dressed in the most Pritzusdike way. It’s unbelievable! Just today I saw a woman walking with a little girl, no doubt enrolled in the local BY. The girl was dressed normally but the mothers skirt barely covered her knees!

    The reason is simple. The girl attends school where there are standards but the mother has no one enforcing any guidelines. So unless we are ready to sanction those who violate Halacha and the sensitivity of our community, all these Asifas won’t accomplish anything.

    Every community whether yeshivish, MO, Sephardic, or whatever, must draft guidelines that their members must keep, and if they don’t the men should not be welcome in shul, the women too, and the children will be asked to leave the school of that community.

    Why can’t we stand up for the purity of our own community? Will we really allow anyone and everyone to flout our Halacha and Minhagim without telling them a word?

    If a woman walks into a linen store, for example, and the owner notices she isn’t conforming to Halacha let her take her aside and say ”nothing personal but as long as your’e dressed like this I ask you not to shop here’. Give up a few dollars for Hashem. If she hears this from a few people she’d quickly change her behavior.

    Chazal say that those who don’t protest an Aveira are punished for it. Where is the outrage? The righteous anger at those contaminating our streets.

    Of course it has to be done in the right way, speak pleasantly. But make your point clear. These actions will not be tolerated.

    There is an attitude of being non-judgemental. This is from the outside world. It is not the Jewish way. If these practices are not curtailed they will keep on pushing the envelope. Are you so sure that mini-skirts will not be seen in the streets of Boro Park?

    The little I know

    There is a greater fear. It was heard at other Asifos, and it was attacked at the internet Asifa in BP last year. If anyone does not comply with the expected rules of tzniyus, their children will be expelled from yeshivos and frum girls schools. Now that will fix things!

    The freedom with which kids are put into the streets, the welcoming arms of the yetzer horoh, is astonishing! Yet, many, many yeshivos and schools have specifics in their admission criteria about the levels of adherence to “standards” for the parents. I have only an inkling of understanding how this may be relevant, but for the most part, it is senseless. If we run our chinuch system to be “rejecting”, what on Earth do we expect from HKB”H when He deals with us Midoh Kineged Midoh?


    Gold42: Suggestion – Move to Mea Shearim where they already follow your Mehalech.

    Besides, any storeowner who did this would get sued, and rightfully so.

    I suspect a troll.


    “The girl was dressed normally but the mothers skirt barely covered her knees!”

    So you’re complaining that someone followed Halachah? I don’t get it.


    You wrote, “The girl was dressed normally but the mothers skirt barely covered her knees!”

    That means the skirt did cover the knees, correct? So I don’t see what the issue is. Are you trying to put in new standards? Now covering the knees is not enough, it needs to go down to mid-calf?

    Either that, or you need a lesson in English. Your use of “anotherwords” shows that you can use one anyway.



    The OP has a point. It is a painful situation. And many people feel they may do as they please.

    Also, if you do something wrong, that is one thing. But if you are a Chotai Umachti it is much worse. You have no idea who you are affecting, and where this may lead the person being affected. I personally am very concerned about having that responsibility.

    And obviously, on the positive side, the rewards even in Olam HaZeh are tremendous. Especially since this is so difficult.


    BP is not a Kehilla its a part of Brooklyh with alot of frum jews , There are all sort of people who live there from MO’s to Satmar (Unlike Williamsburg, Lakewood or KJ)

    And plenty of people just go to 13th ave to Shop , so they might not even be from Borough Park

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