Why not use your real name?

Home Forums YWN Main Site & Coffee Room Issues Why not use your real name?

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  • #589796

    I use my own name online. Daniel Breslauer (actually, Daniel Yehuda Breslauer) is my real name. I don’t understand why so many others avoid using their real names online. What is it exactly that you are afraid of?

    Are you afraid of repercussions for your children in case their schools (chedorim, yeshivos, beis yaakov, whatever) find out you are using the internet? (Regarding this, I must admit that me and my wife are just me and my wife – ie, no children yet.)

    The reason for using my real identity online? I don’t have anything to fear. If I don’t have anything to fear, why shouldn’t I use my own name online?

    There are clear benefits: it’s a lot easier to avoid loshon hora and related things when you are online using your real name. It’s easy to call people bad things (especially in places like forums and blogs) when you don’t have to fear facing any consequences. Using your real name can make you think twice: “do I really want to say this?”

    I’d like to see your reasons for (not) using your real name online.

    #840727

    moti107
    Member

    1 thing that you will gain for sure is that you might find a job since your sharing your wisdom under your real name.

    #840728

    proud tatty
    Member

    Personal information is not allowed in the CR. Users are told not to pry into the personal lives of others. Why should I use my real name?

    I might also be denied a job if someone finds some of my writings and disagrees with me. It is nice being anonymous.

    I also would feel vulnerable. Something might go wrong if I talk about my planned pesach vacation in a hotel with my real name. One could easily look up my name and gain info based upon some of my old posts, put 2 and 2 together and break into my home when I am away.

    I see no personal gain to using my real name.

    #840729

    Daniel. Identify theft. Profiling. Stalking. All are reasons why people use pseudonyms online.

    Being able to express opinions that you think, while not having to worry with people knowing who you are while expressing those opinions, and condemming you for it.

    In the many years that I’ve been online, I have unfortunately come across people who have had all of the above caused to them, causing them immmense amount of stress and suffering.

    And generally, once something is on the internet – it’s there. It cannot be deleted or retracted. Might you really want your children in future years to be able to see a comment that you made in good spirits, but that could be taken in the wrong manner?

    It’s not a case of hiding the full identity – most people do not try to take on a different persona when they are online – as you will see from looking around the CR, screennames can be based on values, backgrounds, profesion’s etc.

    It’s just a safer way of dealing with the greater and wider unknown – if someone came up to you in the street, a total stranger, and started asking you your details – would you give it to them?

    All it is, in the end, is a way of protecting yourself from the dangers of the internet (of which there are many)

    #840730

    yentish
    Participant

    one word…shidduchim…shidduchim…shidduchim 🙂

    no really, all kidding aside, its very easy for one’s words to get twisted around or misinterpreted. this is true of course with a face to face conversation, but even more true with posting comments that express your views. On blogs, media sites or news sites such as YWN, its very easy for someone to misunderstand your opinion, which could then come back to haunt you. Also, since most people remain anonymous on YWN, one feels more comfortable expressing his or her views. I don’t think anyone should take someone’s opinion less seriously just because they remain anonymous.

    I’m not ashamed that I have the internet, that’s completely beside the point, I’m just concerned with the backlash of a person who can’t read between the lines.

    For example, I post on Onlysimchas using my real name, when someone i know has a simcha. i have had situations where acquaintances come over to me and say, “oh, i saw you posted under so and so’s name, mazel tov” etc. This kind of situation is completely innocuous, and obviously OS allows klal yisroel to share in each other’s simchos in a very real way. On sites such as YWN however, where one expresses opinions as opposed to just saying “mazel tov”, posting under your own name can be tricky.

    #840731

    azi
    Participant

    Mr. Breslauer,

    type this into google: Daniel Breslauer YWN

    now you know why people dont use their real names.

    #840732

    For me, I don’t care about people being able to find posts I made online. Why should I fear that? Why should I be afraid? I don’t make any particularly controversial statements, don’t hold any extreme opinions, don’t tend to intentionally offend others, tend to be polite in my writings. As far as I know, someone who googles my name will not get the impression that I am a lazy, violent, criminal, unreliable, unknowing person.

    Using your real name motivates you to remain nice, and be friendly. For example, I doubt whether “moti07” would have written his insulting allegations against me in the “Mehadrin bus” topic, if his real name would be next to it. this is the third time that I have deleted this reference – please refrain from attempting to get this reference approved. YW Moderator-72

    #840733

    akuperma
    Participant

    I got confused and thought “user name” was an account and haven’t figured out how to change it. Anyone checking on the user name will find me fast enough. I’m used to serious discussions where everyone uses a real name (and avoids insults and taunts).

    #840734

    Moderator: apologies, I didn’t know that link was forbidden. I’ll take some time to read the rules. Let me clarify what I was saying, for the others: suggesting that I am a ‘chareidi-basher’ is laughable. I was referring to a way for others to see this by themselves.

    akuperma: it is exactly as you say. People who engage in serious discussions, where insults and taunts have no place, have no reason to fear using their real names.

    In fact, I feel that if the internet did not offer the anonimity which it unfortunately does offer, many more rabbonim/poskim would be more willing to allow its usage than is currently the case. The danger of the internet is that you can do anything you want, and nobody will ever know. Eliminate that danger, and people won’t do stupid things, fearing the consequences. Imagine a list of the websites one visits would be posted in shul every week. (I might add that in my regular shuls, I’m probably just about the only one with internet access – but in America, it might be an idea.)

    #840735

    oomis
    Participant

    I just find it easier to express my opinion without fear of personal backlash by someone who might axctually know me IRL. On the other hand, anyone who knows me in real life, also knows my Screen Name most likely. Oh well. Had I known what I was doing when I signed up, I would have chosen a username that was different from my screen name as an added precaution.

    #840736

    nonnidev
    Member

    Nonnidev is my ‘real’ name, that is what my grandchildren call me. However, I don’t get to post that in my comments to the news forum, there, my name is Anonymous. 🙁 Does anyone know how to change that, or is that up to the moderators?

    (A Nonni is grandma in Italian, the other grandma is the Bubbe, the great-grandma is the Sabta, and the other great-grandma is the Giga…B’H!!!)

    #840737

    nonnidev
    Member

    I guess my post didn’t post…

    I am called nonnidev by my grandchildren…Nonni is grandma in Italian…their other grandma is Bubbe, their great-grandmother is Sabta, their other great-grandmother is Giga…B’H!

    Now someone tell me how to get my name posted in the comments section of the news forum?

    My name is surely not Anonymous.

    Thanks

    #840739

    Jax
    Member

    nonnidev: one reason your screen name shows as Anonymous on the homepage, might be that you registered to YWN in the CR! is that what you might have done?!

    #840740

    GoldieLoxx
    Member

    nice being somewhere where i dont feel judged. nice to speak to people who cant find out who i am. why do you feel the need to be known???

    #840741

    Daniel, I do blog under my real name, and believe me, I write plenty of controversial things there too, so this is not about being unwilling to stand by my opinions. However, this discussion forum is a very different format than a blog. My blog website is my blog website and I feel free to post whatever i want, but this is a group forum run by moderators and passionate debates can sometimes lead to personal attacks. I don’t feel comfortable giving out my real name here (besides which, most other users here have made-up screen names, so it didn’t occur to me to use my real name.)

    #840742

    aussieboy
    Participant

    Its nice being able to write whatever I want without being judged by who i actually am. How people view my opinions is not influenced by what other people think I am or by my age.

    #840743

    noitallmr
    Participant

    Why would someone want to use their real name for all to see???

    That is definitely not a Mehalach and it doesn’t need explaining…it’s just not what you want!!! Period!

    #840744

    squeak
    Participant

    This is not the first time we’ve discussed using real vs pseudo names. Daniel, jump on the bandwagon instead of trying to make everyone else get off. I should put that in a fortune cookie and send it to your house.

    #840745

    Jewess
    Member

    Why would I want to use my real name in an anonymous coffee room?

    #840746

    cherrybim
    Participant

    Daniel Breslauer: Hey, is that really your name?

    Sincerely, Cherry Bim

    #840747

    squeak
    Participant

    Mr. Bim, LOL!

    #840748

    Nobody
    Member

    I am a Nobody and therefore use my real identity!

    The reason people do not use their real names aside from the reasons already outlined is to ensure the freedom of speech or rather the written word without the fear that it may bounce back on the writer negatively.

    On this site all polite, non offensive, non-breaking-of-halacha etc etc opinions are allowed and everyone has an opinion some stronger than others and this site allows them to express their views and comment onwards.

    #840749

    gavra_at_work
    Participant

    Are you the famous “S.Daniel Breslauer, Professor Emeritus of the Department of Religious Studies at the University of Kansas”?

    No wonder why you don’t care 🙂

    As for me, I’m worried people will try to talk politics in the middle of davening! This way, no-one knows I care 🙂

    P.S. Post your address and then we’ll talk. You are still anonymous with a name.

    Good one CherryBim.

    #840750

    jphone
    Member

    I’m the real Daniel Yehuda Breslauer. Who is using my name as an alias on YWN?

    #840751

    moti107
    Member

    gavra_at_work: check out Daniels profile he is unemployed maybe that’s the title of a Professor, but in any case that is definitely true, unlike his name as cherrybim pointed out….

    #840752

    jphone
    Member

    Lets see, my name is Daniel Yehudah Breslaur, no its Eli Cohen, or is it Gavriel Schwartzberg? Wait, my wife just reminded me my name is Yekusiel Horowitz. Do I have a wife?

    See how “real” real names are?

    #840753

    I used my “real” name.

    #840754

    Nobody
    Member

    Come to think of it aren’t we all annonymous people in a vast world of people all trying to be somebody…

    I think I’m getting a little too deep here…..

    #840755

    feivel
    Participant

    someone, a very clever person, on this website was able to find my email address from a few harmless (and i thought to be non-revealing) pieces of information i had casually mentioned by the may in my posts (a while back). what more personal information could be found out if my real name was used? and what could be done with it by a certain element here who may feel hatred towards me?

    you have mentioned many times here daniel how you are without fear. well a mosquito is also without fear, that is not particularly commendable. to have fear yet to go ahead and act, THAT is courage (mark twain said something like that)

    #840756

    feivel
    Participant

    daniel

    i see in your body of writings you have a strong interest in martin buber. you seem to show him a great deal of respect. did you know he was an apikoras and married a goy? i am inferring from this something about your own ideas. do you think this inference is correct? i might also be from the world of academia. perhaps someday your obtaining a position might be dependent on my opinion of you.

    are you perhaps staring to feel even a little bit of fear of using your real name?

    #840757

    chaverim
    Member

    feivel: are you listed in the phone book? If so, forget email which itself can be anonymous, but anyone can get your phone number and ADDRESS. If you are unlisted, you are one of the small minority. Shouldn’t listing name, address and phone # is the directory be a more serious security concern than just a real name online?

    #840758

    feivel
    Participant

    chaverim

    “Shouldn’t listing name, address and phone # is the directory be a more serious security concern than just a real name online? “

    perhaps, so?

    here i am expressing my opinions which can engender a great deal of animosity among the thousands of readers of this website, and perhaps even a desire for revenge.

    the phonebook contains nothing of my personality, ideas and opinions or anything else to stimulate action against me.

    and in any case there are MANY additional possible security concerns, using my visa online or in a store, my garbage can, etc. that takes nothing away from the particular security concern being discussed here.

    #840759

    Nobody
    Member

    we live in a world where one’s own security and that of one’s family/near and dear must be taken into account when using any so called annonymous blog site.

    It’s all very noble to imply that those who write here are afraid to sign with their own names and this possibly would cajole them into revealing their identities but to what end and to what purpose?

    #840760

    nonnidev
    Member

    Okay Jax, since I’m a techno-idiot and have no idea how you young folks do things around here, can you please help an old bubbe out?

    I really have no idea how I registered my name.

    How do I correct this issue?

    I can use a cholent pot correctly, and I can correct homework; but use this forum, not quite…

    Thanks in advance for your help…

    nonnidev

    #840761

    areivimzehlazeh
    Participant

    nonnidev- you can take your question to the “Attention Mods” thread, or email a mod

    PS- I don’t want to aggrevate the POY thread, so I’ll just say that the following post deserves a nomination 🙂

    squeak

    Member

    This is not the first time we’ve discussed using real vs pseudo names. Daniel, jump on the bandwagon instead of trying to make everyone else get off. I should put that in a fortune cookie and send it to your house.

    #840762

    nonni_devora
    Member

    Okay, okay, oooookaaaay!

    I figured this out myself *very proud* and I’ve changed my name a bit…

    Now, I can post in the blog and I am not Anonymous any longer.

    Thanks Jax for that bit of information…Even at my age, I can actually navigate the world of blogs! Who nu!

    Truthfully, I use pseudo names for different reasons; for distinguishing my different mailboxes for parts of my work, for my many projects, sometimes for fun, but Ha Kodesh Baruch Hu knows my name and that is what counts! 🙂

    #840763

    areivimzehlazeh
    Participant

    congrats nonni 🙂

    #840764

    Jax
    Member

    nonni_devora: nice work there! 😉

    #840765

    nonni_devora
    Member

    This brings to mind a funny story…When my middle daughter was 4 and in camp, she came home one day to tell me she wanted to play with a child from her group. I asked her what the little girl was called, she told me, then I asked her what the girl’s mother was called so I could ask to arrange a playdate. My daughter looked at me and said, “Ima, her name is mommy…” 😉

    #840766

    shaatra
    Member

    What fun is it to use ur real name?

    #840770

    Jax
    Member

    your in the clear!

    #840771

    jphone
    Member

    Perhaps we should require the moderators use their real names?

    If we did, we’d have 12 moderators named Chaim Cohen, 14 Baruch Katz’s, 9 Esther Friedmans and 14 Yoel_From_Willi_B’s.

    #840772

    cherrybim
    Participant

    And 1 Joseph.

    #840773

    shaatra
    Member

    Ames: what?

    #840774

    feivel
    Participant

    we havent seen a post from daniel in quite a while

    i wonder if he changed his username to something anonymous?

    #840775

    chaverim
    Member

    feivel: I saw him post today on the main site. He also posts on wikipedia with the same name and his photo is there. So I doubt he went into hiding.

    #840776

    jphone
    Member

    Its good to know someone is keeping tabs on Daniel Breslaur.

    #840777

    moti107
    Member

    Who knows maybe Feviel and Daniel is 1 person

    #840778

    shaatra
    Member

    Ames I thought u meant that, I wrote it but it was deleted!! I am a shaatra 🙂

    #840779

    I’m still here. Was gone for two days because I was quite busy learning the intricate details of the cell cycle, replication checkpoints and the like, and forcing myself to learn math.

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