Yeridas Hadoros, prime ex: Kibbud Av v’Em

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    Unfortunately, our generations are descending. Its evident in all aspects of life and in all communities. Tznius is lacking, Ahavas Chinom is lacking, people are lax in business issues, even when dealing with fellow Jews ,and principles have changed for the worst.

    But I think the typical example of yeridas hadoros can be seen in the mitzvah of ‘Kabed Es ovicho V’es Imecho’. I’ve spoken to elderly people who were brought up in pre-war Europe and they cannot believe how things have changed. They would speak to their parents in third person, they would stand up for them when they entered a room. Its seems that they were in total awe of them.THEY NEVER DARED GIVING THEM MUSSAR or questioning them in anyway. Raising their voices to them? Unheard OF!

    My father once told me how he came home from cheder once crying because the Rebbe had hit. When his father heard that, he smacked him again. Why, ? ‘Because if the Rebbe hit you, you probably deserved it’

    Nevertheless, the love they had for them was geniune.

    Today we have erhlicher Yeshiva Bochurim who come home with ‘freshly baked’ chumras, impose it on parents, speak disrespectfully, and whe parents criticize them, it doesnt seem to have much affect.

    I know its like this all over, some better and some worst. Who’s to blame? Are we spoiling them too much or not enough? Do selfish parents have better children because they dont allow themselves to be taken for granted?

    Or is it perhaps the educators who are at fault? Do they not emphasize ‘Kibbud Av’ as they should? Its in the Aseres Hadibros afterall! Isnt that the ultimate reason to expect it be taught and

    properly and enforced?

    Most importantly, why did it deteriorate to THAT extent in a period of 60 years?


    “Most importantly, why did it deteriorate to THAT extent in a period of 60 years?”

    Ikvos HaMoshiach



    The terrible lack of Kibud Av V’Eim in our generation is appalling.


    this is our own doing…we put everything on the yeshivah, rebbe, administration…where in the torah is it mentioned that when you send a`child to yeashiva you are absolved of their chinuch? we get compliments regarding all our children what balay derech cheretz they are…hows that? because we taught them. whenever we saw them address person not properly like ‘dee’instead of ‘eir’, we corrected it, also to get up for grown ups etc, etc,. ‘noitzair teaina yochal pirya’. plenty adults dont have or dont speak with derech eretz to elders, and that is what their children see. see rashi ‘shimon v’leivi achim’ parshes vaychi


    Kids take an example from their parents. It depends on how their parents treat THEIR parents..


    Jent1150 is absolutely right.


    I am still not satisified as to why things took such a dramatic change for the worst in our generation.


    We live in an age of acceleration – incredible increases in technology being the major example. So everything is happening faster, and unfortunately I guess that means that yeridos hadoros is happening at an accelerated rate. Probably the most important thing we can do is model consistency, or let our kids know we attempt to and value it. Rabbi Frand some years ago spoke during the aseres yemai teshuva about cynicism. It may be transcribed in one of his books. It may be the biggest antidote.


    Unfortunately, some act as if this Mitzvah only begins when the parent passes away.


    Children some years ago had much greater and much more responsibilities. Hitting was acceptable in those days, so parent’s and teachers alike were more terrifying to them. Children didn’t have much of a voice then as they do now, which gives them a sense of power. Now days Mothers have careers and Fathers are learning & sometimes working as well, so there isn’t much time to discipline, which is hardly an excuse. Our children, Our family, should come first, but unfortunately there are children left to fend for themselves without sufficient attention. Many children are raised by their daycare teachers from infancy. Sadly, there is so much more to add to the list of reasons behind all the chutzpahdik children out there. All I have to say is, thank God for Shabbos, everything suddenly STOPS, & forces families to spend quality with each other.

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