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When I was in the Parsha, my issue was I was underrepresented. It may have been because I left Yeshiva and went to work instead of Kollel, or that I looked 17 when I was 23 (when I got engaged, many comments on simchaspot were wondering why a kid was getting married). Baruch Hashem though, things worked out for me.
However for those who are having a hard time with networking, here is an interesting idea.
If there were zoom meetings set up with people, with the participants representing 2-3 singles, and in the meeting, each person takes turns to discuss the single in question. Afterward, the participants can email each other for more info about the single they represented, and potentially set something up.
There may be a few issues with this approach, one being that the main issue is picky people… That wouldn’t really solve that. Another issue is, might be a zoom meeting with Men and ladies. This can be solved if there was a no-camera policy, or make meetings for only men, and only ladies.
In my head this is a good idea, I have no clue in reality if it is or isn’t. I do not have the time or know-how to get such a thing going, but If you think this is a good idea, please go ahead and get it done if you can.
You haven’t explained what exactly is your idea. I’m confused
Apparently the OP is suggesting that Shadchanim network via Zoom.
This sounds like the shidduch meetings women hold in many communities, updated to take advantage of technology so they can potentially branch out to other communities instead of staying local.
Better solution. Stop ignoring younger non learning boys. They are available by the dozens.
Oh woops! That would mean a solution for the shidduch crises that does not involve stopping yeshiva bochurim from learning. What was I thinking? The mods better take that one down before we are all excommunicated.
N0m: If you were correct, then working/non-learning boys would be remaining unmarried. But that doesn’t appear to be the case.
Dear Ujm,
There are four options for young boys in our community that are no longer learning. They marry early, fake it in yeshiva, become unmarriageable, or leave the fold. Those that thread the needle, are pretty much invisible. So yeah, they do not appear in any case.
N0m: There is no abundance (i.e. more than other demographics, namely learning boys) of non-learning boys who remain long-term single or even single until an older age. In other words, there is absolutely no evidence (if you submit otherwise, please do submit it) of non-learning boys marrying later than learning boys or of them remaining single in greater proportions than learning boys.
This is even the case if you discount “fake learners in yeshiva” and disregard them. Regarding those openly not learning in yeshiva are not getting married later or never moreso than learners.
Regarding going OTD (“leaving the fold”), there’s probably some truth to that; but that’s more due to the fact that learning Torah is more likely to keep one in the fold and sincerely observant than one who isn’t learning.
P.S. N0m: It is after Chanukah. You stipulated that you’d follow up on the conversation regarding saving the lives of men before women, in the thread you promised a further comment on over a year ago that never materialized.
n0m – you better get on that! nothing excites him more than that topic (discussed ad nauseum and rehashed whenever possible) except maybe slapping your wife and kids.
Dear UJM,
There are entire groups of older working boys that barely even date. The point is that they need to date younger because they do not age nearly as well as learning boys.
Dear UJM,
When I last posted, I remembered my pledge and found that thread. Your recollections are far superior to mine. I see that I was really in middle of the sugya then, I would have to get back there. In the meantime, I apologize.
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